Re: How to tell your child they have Autism...

[Guest guest]

the best thing is of honesty and if she is of asking she has of a right

to know of the truth but not share it as though it were of a negative

but share the posititive side of her autism to her.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

the best thing is of honesty and if she is of asking she has of a right

to know of the truth but not share it as though it were of a negative

but share the posititive side of her autism to her.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

the best thing is of honesty and if she is of asking she has of a right

to know of the truth but not share it as though it were of a negative

but share the posititive side of her autism to her.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

My kids, and Allie, know that she has autism from getting sick with

a shot while she was already sick. Since Allie has had a lot of the

illnesses associated with autism, we view autism largely as a

medical condition. Allie is very frustrated with not being able to

get out words, sounds as if that's not that big an issue with your

child? When we talk about it with Allie, it's more of a cheerleading

session, " Allie, I know you can't get your words out because of the

autism, it's okay, we won't give up if you won't, we can make it. "

And I also point out really cool people who have had autism, and

that having autism is really cool, despite the sickness.

In the last few months she really got into reading a children's book

I wrote about her, 's Little Sister. That's pretty cool, now

she will say, " Allie has autism. " I say, " Does that make Allie happy

or sad? " and she says, " Happy! "

I think it's important to be real, but to be as positive as we can.

I want her to have pride in herself and to be able to participate in

treatment decisions impacting her. I think it's made her feel better

about herself since I've started discussing the exact reasons we do

as we do, it's taken away the mystery. And for at least me, mystery

always is way more fearful than truth. I think that's one of the

overlapping things I share with a lot of those with autism, not

knowing something affecting me brings me lots of anxiety, maybe

that's the case with your daughter? Don't know, just brainstorming.

HTH,

Debi

BTW, my daughter just turned 9

[Guest guest]

My kids, and Allie, know that she has autism from getting sick with

a shot while she was already sick. Since Allie has had a lot of the

illnesses associated with autism, we view autism largely as a

medical condition. Allie is very frustrated with not being able to

get out words, sounds as if that's not that big an issue with your

child? When we talk about it with Allie, it's more of a cheerleading

session, " Allie, I know you can't get your words out because of the

autism, it's okay, we won't give up if you won't, we can make it. "

And I also point out really cool people who have had autism, and

that having autism is really cool, despite the sickness.

In the last few months she really got into reading a children's book

I wrote about her, 's Little Sister. That's pretty cool, now

she will say, " Allie has autism. " I say, " Does that make Allie happy

or sad? " and she says, " Happy! "

I think it's important to be real, but to be as positive as we can.

I want her to have pride in herself and to be able to participate in

treatment decisions impacting her. I think it's made her feel better

about herself since I've started discussing the exact reasons we do

as we do, it's taken away the mystery. And for at least me, mystery

always is way more fearful than truth. I think that's one of the

overlapping things I share with a lot of those with autism, not

knowing something affecting me brings me lots of anxiety, maybe

that's the case with your daughter? Don't know, just brainstorming.

HTH,

Debi

BTW, my daughter just turned 9

[Guest guest]

My kids, and Allie, know that she has autism from getting sick with

a shot while she was already sick. Since Allie has had a lot of the

illnesses associated with autism, we view autism largely as a

medical condition. Allie is very frustrated with not being able to

get out words, sounds as if that's not that big an issue with your

child? When we talk about it with Allie, it's more of a cheerleading

session, " Allie, I know you can't get your words out because of the

autism, it's okay, we won't give up if you won't, we can make it. "

And I also point out really cool people who have had autism, and

that having autism is really cool, despite the sickness.

In the last few months she really got into reading a children's book

I wrote about her, 's Little Sister. That's pretty cool, now

she will say, " Allie has autism. " I say, " Does that make Allie happy

or sad? " and she says, " Happy! "

I think it's important to be real, but to be as positive as we can.

I want her to have pride in herself and to be able to participate in

treatment decisions impacting her. I think it's made her feel better

about herself since I've started discussing the exact reasons we do

as we do, it's taken away the mystery. And for at least me, mystery

always is way more fearful than truth. I think that's one of the

overlapping things I share with a lot of those with autism, not

knowing something affecting me brings me lots of anxiety, maybe

that's the case with your daughter? Don't know, just brainstorming.

HTH,

Debi

BTW, my daughter just turned 9

[Guest guest]

I'm going through the same thing with my 10yo daughter. I've also

started going to an autism support group and she's asked me about it.

So far she's been ok with my replies of something along the lies of

her having it, but we have her going to (insert the different

therapies here) to help her. I let her know she's like the other

kids, but just needs some extra help with things like school, or

speech. If she looks upset I mention a class mate or friend who goes

to see the speech therapist for his speech, or something along those

lines so she feels like she fits in.

I hope this helps......Lori

>

> My daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD, Apraxia,

> Learning Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her

> that she has any type of disorder. As long as she can remember she has

> always gone to Speech Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has been

> not wanting to go to any of theese things for almost 2 years now, she

> is tired of it... " it uses to much of her time " , " she would rather do

> something else. " I tell her she needs to go to speech to help with her

> speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just started going to an

> Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism Summit this week

> and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do you have it,

> Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different than

> you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of things

> do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it is

> OK for her to have it and not the other family members. I told her

> everybody is different in thier own way. But she is pressing for

> more... any suggestions? Thanks-Jennie

>

[Guest guest]

I'm going through the same thing with my 10yo daughter. I've also

started going to an autism support group and she's asked me about it.

So far she's been ok with my replies of something along the lies of

her having it, but we have her going to (insert the different

therapies here) to help her. I let her know she's like the other

kids, but just needs some extra help with things like school, or

speech. If she looks upset I mention a class mate or friend who goes

to see the speech therapist for his speech, or something along those

lines so she feels like she fits in.

I hope this helps......Lori

>

> My daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD, Apraxia,

> Learning Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her

> that she has any type of disorder. As long as she can remember she has

> always gone to Speech Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has been

> not wanting to go to any of theese things for almost 2 years now, she

> is tired of it... " it uses to much of her time " , " she would rather do

> something else. " I tell her she needs to go to speech to help with her

> speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just started going to an

> Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism Summit this week

> and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do you have it,

> Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different than

> you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of things

> do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it is

> OK for her to have it and not the other family members. I told her

> everybody is different in thier own way. But she is pressing for

> more... any suggestions? Thanks-Jennie

>

[Guest guest]

There are some really neat books out there written for children about

autism/AS. I work in an elementary school, and the books that I have

seen/used present autism/AS as having unique differences in a

positive way. (There's even one about a boy and his " school tools "

that talks about sensory differences. This particular book helped a

student understand that it was okay to use classroom sensory tools.

A parent sent this book to school because the child wanted to read it

to me. While the student and I were reading the book together, the

child voiced several times that the boy was " just like me " !) Several

parents that I know have read these kinds of books and talked about

them with their children.

We have also used the books in the general education classrooms to

increase awareness about autism. When we have visited with classrooms

as a team (parents, and sometimes students included), we focus on

everyone's uniqueness and how we are all more alike than different in

that respect. Each of us has unique strengths, and we all have

things that we are working on or are more difficult for us to do.

My personal library of books is at school, but if anyone is

interested in knowing some titles of books that parents have used,

let me know, and I can e-mail you or post them. Our metro area

autism network (through the State Dept. of Education) has a lending

library where professionals/parents can borrow books. If your area

has a lending library, maybe you could borrow the books to see if

they are appropriate to read with your child. Hope this helps.

Rhonda

>

> My kids, and Allie, know that she has autism from getting sick with

> a shot while she was already sick. Since Allie has had a lot of the

> illnesses associated with autism, we view autism largely as a

> medical condition. Allie is very frustrated with not being able to

> get out words, sounds as if that's not that big an issue with your

> child? When we talk about it with Allie, it's more of a

cheerleading

> session, " Allie, I know you can't get your words out because of the

> autism, it's okay, we won't give up if you won't, we can make it. "

> And I also point out really cool people who have had autism, and

> that having autism is really cool, despite the sickness.

>

> In the last few months she really got into reading a children's

book

> I wrote about her, 's Little Sister. That's pretty cool, now

> she will say, " Allie has autism. " I say, " Does that make Allie

happy

> or sad? " and she says, " Happy! "

>

> I think it's important to be real, but to be as positive as we can.

> I want her to have pride in herself and to be able to participate

in

> treatment decisions impacting her. I think it's made her feel

better

> about herself since I've started discussing the exact reasons we do

> as we do, it's taken away the mystery. And for at least me, mystery

> always is way more fearful than truth. I think that's one of the

> overlapping things I share with a lot of those with autism, not

> knowing something affecting me brings me lots of anxiety, maybe

> that's the case with your daughter? Don't know, just brainstorming.

>

> HTH,

> Debi

>

> BTW, my daughter just turned 9

>

[Guest guest]

I'd be very interested in your book list Thanks for sharing! I also am

an asd sp. ed teacher,

but currently working in middle school ...

Belle

On Fri, Aug 1, 2008 at 5:44 AM, asd_sped_teacher <asd_sped_teacher@...

> wrote:

> There are some really neat books out there written for children about

> autism/AS. I work in an elementary school, and the books that I have

> seen/used present autism/AS as having unique differences in a

> positive way. (There's even one about a boy and his " school tools "

> that talks about sensory differences. This particular book helped a

> student understand that it was okay to use classroom sensory tools.

> A parent sent this book to school because the child wanted to read it

> to me. While the student and I were reading the book together, the

> child voiced several times that the boy was " just like me " !) Several

> parents that I know have read these kinds of books and talked about

> them with their children.

>

> We have also used the books in the general education classrooms to

> increase awareness about autism. When we have visited with classrooms

> as a team (parents, and sometimes students included), we focus on

> everyone's uniqueness and how we are all more alike than different in

> that respect. Each of us has unique strengths, and we all have

> things that we are working on or are more difficult for us to do.

>

> My personal library of books is at school, but if anyone is

> interested in knowing some titles of books that parents have used,

> let me know, and I can e-mail you or post them. Our metro area

> autism network (through the State Dept. of Education) has a lending

> library where professionals/parents can borrow books. If your area

> has a lending library, maybe you could borrow the books to see if

> they are appropriate to read with your child. Hope this helps.

> Rhonda

>

>

> >

> > My kids, and Allie, know that she has autism from getting sick with

> > a shot while she was already sick. Since Allie has had a lot of the

> > illnesses associated with autism, we view autism largely as a

> > medical condition. Allie is very frustrated with not being able to

> > get out words, sounds as if that's not that big an issue with your

> > child? When we talk about it with Allie, it's more of a

> cheerleading

> > session, " Allie, I know you can't get your words out because of the

> > autism, it's okay, we won't give up if you won't, we can make it. "

> > And I also point out really cool people who have had autism, and

> > that having autism is really cool, despite the sickness.

> >

> > In the last few months she really got into reading a children's

> book

> > I wrote about her, 's Little Sister. That's pretty cool, now

> > she will say, " Allie has autism. " I say, " Does that make Allie

> happy

> > or sad? " and she says, " Happy! "

> >

> > I think it's important to be real, but to be as positive as we can.

> > I want her to have pride in herself and to be able to participate

> in

> > treatment decisions impacting her. I think it's made her feel

> better

> > about herself since I've started discussing the exact reasons we do

> > as we do, it's taken away the mystery. And for at least me, mystery

> > always is way more fearful than truth. I think that's one of the

> > overlapping things I share with a lot of those with autism, not

> > knowing something affecting me brings me lots of anxiety, maybe

> > that's the case with your daughter? Don't know, just brainstorming.

> >

> > HTH,

> > Debi

> >

> > BTW, my daughter just turned 9

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I'd be very interested in your book list Thanks for sharing! I also am

an asd sp. ed teacher,

but currently working in middle school ...

Belle

On Fri, Aug 1, 2008 at 5:44 AM, asd_sped_teacher <asd_sped_teacher@...

> wrote:

> There are some really neat books out there written for children about

> autism/AS. I work in an elementary school, and the books that I have

> seen/used present autism/AS as having unique differences in a

> positive way. (There's even one about a boy and his " school tools "

> that talks about sensory differences. This particular book helped a

> student understand that it was okay to use classroom sensory tools.

> A parent sent this book to school because the child wanted to read it

> to me. While the student and I were reading the book together, the

> child voiced several times that the boy was " just like me " !) Several

> parents that I know have read these kinds of books and talked about

> them with their children.

>

> We have also used the books in the general education classrooms to

> increase awareness about autism. When we have visited with classrooms

> as a team (parents, and sometimes students included), we focus on

> everyone's uniqueness and how we are all more alike than different in

> that respect. Each of us has unique strengths, and we all have

> things that we are working on or are more difficult for us to do.

>

> My personal library of books is at school, but if anyone is

> interested in knowing some titles of books that parents have used,

> let me know, and I can e-mail you or post them. Our metro area

> autism network (through the State Dept. of Education) has a lending

> library where professionals/parents can borrow books. If your area

> has a lending library, maybe you could borrow the books to see if

> they are appropriate to read with your child. Hope this helps.

> Rhonda

>

>

> >

> > My kids, and Allie, know that she has autism from getting sick with

> > a shot while she was already sick. Since Allie has had a lot of the

> > illnesses associated with autism, we view autism largely as a

> > medical condition. Allie is very frustrated with not being able to

> > get out words, sounds as if that's not that big an issue with your

> > child? When we talk about it with Allie, it's more of a

> cheerleading

> > session, " Allie, I know you can't get your words out because of the

> > autism, it's okay, we won't give up if you won't, we can make it. "

> > And I also point out really cool people who have had autism, and

> > that having autism is really cool, despite the sickness.

> >

> > In the last few months she really got into reading a children's

> book

> > I wrote about her, 's Little Sister. That's pretty cool, now

> > she will say, " Allie has autism. " I say, " Does that make Allie

> happy

> > or sad? " and she says, " Happy! "

> >

> > I think it's important to be real, but to be as positive as we can.

> > I want her to have pride in herself and to be able to participate

> in

> > treatment decisions impacting her. I think it's made her feel

> better

> > about herself since I've started discussing the exact reasons we do

> > as we do, it's taken away the mystery. And for at least me, mystery

> > always is way more fearful than truth. I think that's one of the

> > overlapping things I share with a lot of those with autism, not

> > knowing something affecting me brings me lots of anxiety, maybe

> > that's the case with your daughter? Don't know, just brainstorming.

> >

> > HTH,

> > Debi

> >

> > BTW, my daughter just turned 9

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

My daughter is also 10 and was diagnosed with HFA/PDD at age 3. She is

currently having a psychological evaluation that is still in progress. The

psychologist said so far it is looking like she may have some learning

disabilities. It takes a long time for her to answer the questions posed to her

but sometimes she does get them right after the long pause (during testing).

Does anyone have an idea what news I might be getting soon? What kind of LD

would this be?

Thanks

-------------- Original message --------------

I'm going through the same thing with my 10yo daughter. I've also

started going to an autism support group and she's asked me about it.

So far she's been ok with my replies of something along the lies of

her having it, but we have her going to (insert the different

therapies here) to help her. I let her know she's like the other

kids, but just needs some extra help with things like school, or

speech. If she looks upset I mention a class mate or friend who goes

to see the speech therapist for his speech, or something along those

lines so she feels like she fits in.

I hope this helps......Lori

>

> My daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD, Apraxia,

> Learning Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her

> that she has any type of disorder. As long as she can remember she has

> always gone to Speech Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has been

> not wanting to go to any of theese things for almost 2 years now, she

> is tired of it... " it uses to much of her time " , " she would rather do

> something else. " I tell her she needs to go to speech to help with her

> speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just started going to an

> Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism Summit this week

> and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do you have it,

> Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different than

> you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of things

> do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it is

> OK for her to have it and not the other family members. I told her

> everybody is different in thier own way. But she is pressing for

> more... any suggestions? Thanks-Jennie

>

[Guest guest]

My daughter is also 10 and was diagnosed with HFA/PDD at age 3. She is

currently having a psychological evaluation that is still in progress. The

psychologist said so far it is looking like she may have some learning

disabilities. It takes a long time for her to answer the questions posed to her

but sometimes she does get them right after the long pause (during testing).

Does anyone have an idea what news I might be getting soon? What kind of LD

would this be?

Thanks

-------------- Original message --------------

I'm going through the same thing with my 10yo daughter. I've also

started going to an autism support group and she's asked me about it.

So far she's been ok with my replies of something along the lies of

her having it, but we have her going to (insert the different

therapies here) to help her. I let her know she's like the other

kids, but just needs some extra help with things like school, or

speech. If she looks upset I mention a class mate or friend who goes

to see the speech therapist for his speech, or something along those

lines so she feels like she fits in.

I hope this helps......Lori

>

> My daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD, Apraxia,

> Learning Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her

> that she has any type of disorder. As long as she can remember she has

> always gone to Speech Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has been

> not wanting to go to any of theese things for almost 2 years now, she

> is tired of it... " it uses to much of her time " , " she would rather do

> something else. " I tell her she needs to go to speech to help with her

> speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just started going to an

> Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism Summit this week

> and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do you have it,

> Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different than

> you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of things

> do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it is

> OK for her to have it and not the other family members. I told her

> everybody is different in thier own way. But she is pressing for

> more... any suggestions? Thanks-Jennie

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jennie!

There is a GREAT book out there called " Aspergers, What Does it Mean

to Me? " by Faherty. It's kind of like a journal in a sense

but it explains autism (not just aspergers because my daughter's not

aspergers) what it is, what it's NOT, and what it means to yourself,

and to the rest of the world. Most of it is circling things that you

are " good at " or that you " enjoy doing " or " like " and then some are

fill in the blank or draw a picture. There are no right or wrong

answers, we kind of look at it as a diary that helps her along by

giving her ideas and structure. The book is all about the child,

introduces autism very shortly into the book after building up the

child's self-esteem, rather than opening the book and immediately

shooting them down which I liked a lot.

My daughter always knew she had autism but was mainstreamed from the

first grade forward. She started denying autism the past two years

and wanted to keep it a secret from everyone so we got this book and

tried to take the angle that she should be proud to be autistic

because of all that she's accomplished. She still doesn't see it

that way but that'll come with age. She really likes this book and

takes it to therapies with her and they work on it with her so she

gets to write in it several times a week. Each chapter also has a

section for parents and teachers which is SO WONDERFUL! I know I'm

rambling and I'm sorry but I have to tell you just one more

thing! I'm a list-maker...I always have a list going. Like most

people, I check off each item as I finish it. One of the

parent/teacher hints was to let the autistic children check off their

lists as they BEGIN their task because it would probably make more

sense to them. That NEVER dawned on me! It's so simple but it never

EVER occurred to me to do that! I'm telling you...even aside from

something that simple, there are a ton of other things too...it's a

GREAT book. It's helped my daughter tremendously!

I got the book on Amazon for about $25-28 which was less than retail.

Good Luck!

>

> My daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD,

Apraxia,

> Learning Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her

> that she has any type of disorder. As long as she can remember she

has

> always gone to Speech Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has

been

> not wanting to go to any of theese things for almost 2 years now,

she

> is tired of it... " it uses to much of her time " , " she would rather

do

> something else. " I tell her she needs to go to speech to help with

her

> speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just started going to

an

> Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism Summit this

week

> and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do you have

it,

> Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different

than

> you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of

things

> do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it

is

> OK for her to have it and not the other family members. I told her

> everybody is different in thier own way. But she is pressing for

> more... any suggestions? Thanks-Jennie

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jennie!

There is a GREAT book out there called " Aspergers, What Does it Mean

to Me? " by Faherty. It's kind of like a journal in a sense

but it explains autism (not just aspergers because my daughter's not

aspergers) what it is, what it's NOT, and what it means to yourself,

and to the rest of the world. Most of it is circling things that you

are " good at " or that you " enjoy doing " or " like " and then some are

fill in the blank or draw a picture. There are no right or wrong

answers, we kind of look at it as a diary that helps her along by

giving her ideas and structure. The book is all about the child,

introduces autism very shortly into the book after building up the

child's self-esteem, rather than opening the book and immediately

shooting them down which I liked a lot.

My daughter always knew she had autism but was mainstreamed from the

first grade forward. She started denying autism the past two years

and wanted to keep it a secret from everyone so we got this book and

tried to take the angle that she should be proud to be autistic

because of all that she's accomplished. She still doesn't see it

that way but that'll come with age. She really likes this book and

takes it to therapies with her and they work on it with her so she

gets to write in it several times a week. Each chapter also has a

section for parents and teachers which is SO WONDERFUL! I know I'm

rambling and I'm sorry but I have to tell you just one more

thing! I'm a list-maker...I always have a list going. Like most

people, I check off each item as I finish it. One of the

parent/teacher hints was to let the autistic children check off their

lists as they BEGIN their task because it would probably make more

sense to them. That NEVER dawned on me! It's so simple but it never

EVER occurred to me to do that! I'm telling you...even aside from

something that simple, there are a ton of other things too...it's a

GREAT book. It's helped my daughter tremendously!

I got the book on Amazon for about $25-28 which was less than retail.

Good Luck!

>

> My daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD,

Apraxia,

> Learning Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her

> that she has any type of disorder. As long as she can remember she

has

> always gone to Speech Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has

been

> not wanting to go to any of theese things for almost 2 years now,

she

> is tired of it... " it uses to much of her time " , " she would rather

do

> something else. " I tell her she needs to go to speech to help with

her

> speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just started going to

an

> Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism Summit this

week

> and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do you have

it,

> Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different

than

> you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of

things

> do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it

is

> OK for her to have it and not the other family members. I told her

> everybody is different in thier own way. But she is pressing for

> more... any suggestions? Thanks-Jennie

>

[Guest guest]

my daughter is almost 14.......to sit and explain to her that she has

autism....i dont know if the thought has ever crossed my mind....what benefit

would it be to her, she thinks as a 6 year old in most areas.........maybe in

time.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls@...: hmjk@...: Fri, 1 Aug 2008

20:34:09 +0000Subject: Re: Re: How to tell your child they

have Autism...

My daughter is also 10 and was diagnosed with HFA/PDD at age 3. She is currently

having a psychological evaluation that is still in progress. The psychologist

said so far it is looking like she may have some learning disabilities. It takes

a long time for her to answer the questions posed to her but sometimes she does

get them right after the long pause (during testing). Does anyone have an idea

what news I might be getting soon? What kind of LD would this

be?Thanks-------------- Original message -------------- From: " lorily4 "

I'm going through the same thing with my 10yo daughter. I've

alsostarted going to an autism support group and she's asked me about it.So far

she's been ok with my replies of something along the lies ofher having it, but

we have her going to (insert the differenttherapies here) to help her. I let her

know she's like the otherkids, but just needs some extra help with things like

school, orspeech. If she looks upset I mention a class mate or friend who goesto

see the speech therapist for his speech, or something along thoselines so she

feels like she fits in. I hope this helps......Lori>> My

daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD, Apraxia, > Learning

Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her > that she has any

type of disorder. As long as she can remember she has > always gone to Speech

Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has been > not wanting to go to any of

theese things for almost 2 years now, she > is tired of it... " it uses to much

of her time " , " she would rather do > something else. " I tell her she needs to go

to speech to help with her > speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just

started going to an > Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism

Summit this week > and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do

you have it, > Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different

than > you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of things >

do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it is > OK for

her to have it and not the other family members. I told her > everybody is

different in thier own way. But she is pressing for > more... any suggestions?

Thanks-Jennie>

[Guest guest]

my daughter is almost 14.......to sit and explain to her that she has

autism....i dont know if the thought has ever crossed my mind....what benefit

would it be to her, she thinks as a 6 year old in most areas.........maybe in

time.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls@...: hmjk@...: Fri, 1 Aug 2008

20:34:09 +0000Subject: Re: Re: How to tell your child they

have Autism...

My daughter is also 10 and was diagnosed with HFA/PDD at age 3. She is currently

having a psychological evaluation that is still in progress. The psychologist

said so far it is looking like she may have some learning disabilities. It takes

a long time for her to answer the questions posed to her but sometimes she does

get them right after the long pause (during testing). Does anyone have an idea

what news I might be getting soon? What kind of LD would this

be?Thanks-------------- Original message -------------- From: " lorily4 "

I'm going through the same thing with my 10yo daughter. I've

alsostarted going to an autism support group and she's asked me about it.So far

she's been ok with my replies of something along the lies ofher having it, but

we have her going to (insert the differenttherapies here) to help her. I let her

know she's like the otherkids, but just needs some extra help with things like

school, orspeech. If she looks upset I mention a class mate or friend who goesto

see the speech therapist for his speech, or something along thoselines so she

feels like she fits in. I hope this helps......Lori>> My

daughter is 10, almost 11 years old. She has Autism, OCD, Apraxia, > Learning

Disabilities, ect..... I have never straight out told her > that she has any

type of disorder. As long as she can remember she has > always gone to Speech

Therapy, RSP, Social Skills Group. She has been > not wanting to go to any of

theese things for almost 2 years now, she > is tired of it... " it uses to much

of her time " , " she would rather do > something else. " I tell her she needs to go

to speech to help with her > speech, RSP to help with school work ect. I just

started going to an > Autism support group in my area and went to an Autism

Summit this week > and she is asking " What is Autism " , " Why do I have it " , Do

you have it, > Does other family members have it " , " I dont want to be different

than > you " ...ect. How do you explain this to your kids, what kinds of things >

do you say to them to help them understand what it is, and that it is > OK for

her to have it and not the other family members. I told her > everybody is

different in thier own way. But she is pressing for > more... any suggestions?

Thanks-Jennie>

[Guest guest]

Cheryl you not need to sit of her down to tell of her this but make

of it causual words to ehr and identify to her why she does waht she

does is of because of her autism such as share I know sound is hard

for you , many with autism have a hard time with sound , or well

sound is of hard for you because of you autism and this will help her

figure it out for her own self internally if you will.

the outward expressions of us might appear of 6 in many areas but

what is of profoundly trapped with in us (because of lack of words to

express it or show it in ways others cant tell of us) does not equate

we are of not understanding at a higher level about other things.

she may very well be of aware of her bing different and wonding to

self of the whys to it but is not able to know because no one is of

giving her the key words to learn/understand of her own being. many

times we as parents may know our child is of responding due to

sensory issues or wahtever but no one is of giving us the words or

teaching us to read our own bodies and thus we are of left with only

the ability to respond non vernbally in ways others see as negative

behaviors.

When a child is of for example struggling with diabetes over time

they are of exposed so frequently to the terms of their disease, and

thus can communicate to others if their blood sugar is of off or low

or too high and they learn how to read the tools to measure their

levels and such they learn of this as part of their over all part of

self learning to manage of their lives, but for some with autism and

or other learning issues or cognitive/intellecual issues they are of

not educated in the terms of their challenges in ways to learn how to

communicate to others in ways that supports them. when we fail to

expose of the children to these terms we lock them into their

disability with no voice or ability to reason out the things they can

learn over time to understand over their beings.

we also on the other fashionbs need to learn to respect their no's to

a degree. out of all the peoples those with cogntive and intellectual

impairments are the ones who lack respect to their right to say no,

which leaves of them vulnerable to abuse by caregivers and others.

Most people are of able to say no and it be of respected so we need

to learn to validate of our kids no's too.

sondra

[Guest guest]

sorry wanted of to clarify of my post in part was to cheryl but most

was of in response as a whole to the group. teaching of the terms and

about their dx is of a life process not a thing one does and sits them

down to tell of them all at once. make of it as positive as posible not

making it look like they are of a negative for to have of autism but

that it is of a part of them not the whole of them. Even though the

autism sort of dictates how we will respond and react to any given

situation.

sondra

[Guest guest]

HI All

we got a book called

I have autism....what's that? (I can probably find the ISBN if anyone is

interested) which describes very simply what it is like, my daughter found it

very useful as although she has a learning disability in addition to ASD, she

knows that she is not the same as others and is very frustrated by this, at

least she now has a reason or a name to why she is different, from which she

seems to have taken comfort.

Tony

In a message dated 02/08/2008 05:14:44 GMT Standard Time, fightingautism@y

ahoo.com writes:

Maybe she would understand her own body better? Even six year-olds

understand differences. My five year-old is always talking about

things she notices different about each other and herself.

Debi

>

>

> my daughter is almost 14.......to sit and explain to her that she

has autism....i dont know if the thought has ever crossed my

mind....what benefit would it be to her, she thinks as a 6 year old in

most areas.......most areas......

>

> Cheryl S [chez]

(\__/)

(='.'=)

( " )_( " )

[Guest guest]

HI All

we got a book called

I have autism....what's that? (I can probably find the ISBN if anyone is

interested) which describes very simply what it is like, my daughter found it

very useful as although she has a learning disability in addition to ASD, she

knows that she is not the same as others and is very frustrated by this, at

least she now has a reason or a name to why she is different, from which she

seems to have taken comfort.

Tony

In a message dated 02/08/2008 05:14:44 GMT Standard Time, fightingautism@y

ahoo.com writes:

Maybe she would understand her own body better? Even six year-olds

understand differences. My five year-old is always talking about

things she notices different about each other and herself.

Debi

>

>

> my daughter is almost 14.......to sit and explain to her that she

has autism....i dont know if the thought has ever crossed my

mind....what benefit would it be to her, she thinks as a 6 year old in

most areas.......most areas......

>

> Cheryl S [chez]

(\__/)

(='.'=)

( " )_( " )

[Guest guest]

Maybe she would understand her own body better? Even six year-olds

understand differences. My five year-old is always talking about

things she notices different about each other and herself.

Debi

>

>

> my daughter is almost 14.......to sit and explain to her that she

has autism....i dont know if the thought has ever crossed my

mind....what benefit would it be to her, she thinks as a 6 year old in

most areas.........maybe in time.

>

> Cheryl S [chez]

[Guest guest]

Maybe she would understand her own body better? Even six year-olds

understand differences. My five year-old is always talking about

things she notices different about each other and herself.

Debi

>

>

> my daughter is almost 14.......to sit and explain to her that she

has autism....i dont know if the thought has ever crossed my

mind....what benefit would it be to her, she thinks as a 6 year old in

most areas.........maybe in time.

>

> Cheryl S [chez]

[Guest guest]

both of my girls know that they are autistic and have known for many

years. They could hardly know otherwise as they have been seeing

various professionals since they were 18 months old. My elder child

is very compromised and does not really understand but walks up to

people and says, " Hi my name is Rach, I'm autistic, what's your

name " . for her, it isn't really a problem. Everyone else however is

very taken aback by her " forwardness " .

My younger child doesn't want to be like her sister and has

continuously fought against all of the supports we have worked so hard

to put in place. She refuses to have a schedule, or leave class to

work with an SLP or SEA. In fact, because she is " Only a little bit

autistic " , she claims that she doesn't need any of those things that

her sister needs.

We have always just been matter of fact about her condition. " You are

autistic, but you get extra help to make it easier for you to

concentrate " . She has two or three friends who also work with her for

extra help time. It makes her less differentiated in class.