Re: Introduction for new and old members

[Guest guest]

Hello Rhonda from New South Wales ..

This is Sami who is living between Saudi Arabia and Kuwait .. in a way I felt

moved by what

happened to you, may you have the blessings and strength to empower your heart

to go

through .. and may your heart be filled with bliss along the way ...

Sami

> Hello to so many new members!!

>

[Guest guest]

Hello Rhonda,Your story touched me. I also suffered a similar childhood of abuse, and hatred. My brother and I watched my mother night after night endure beatings and knowing that her kids were watching. And of course the abuse was turned on to us. Our lives were in a hurricane of black hatred. The only light we knew was our mother. She taught us what unconditional love was, and that was our lifeline as we grew up. My mother passed unexpectantly in a car accident when I was 9, so my brother and I moved away into a completely different world of unknown possibilities with our real dad who we didn't even remember (who was a drug addict). Strange circumstances. We've actually grown into adults now who can handle anything life throws our way. I'm certain of it. As long as we remain open to the power of the divine to help guide us even in the blackest of times. You're a courageous person for telling your story, and making the change for the better. Breaking the cycle of a dark life is an incredibly difficult thing to do. You just have to realize that that's not the life you want for yourself anymore, and take the steps to changing it. Everything from then on falls into place and once again you're standing on your own two feet. Focus is the key word. Motivation then comes second. Endless blessings to you Rhonda,Stefanie>> Hello to so many new members!!> > Thank you Debbie for such a warm welcome back, I have read your messages through the group and I just wanted to let you know my brain not only reads but also writes dyslexic as well, (although I'm in no way multi lingual!! lol)> > I thought that perhaps now is a good time to intoduce my self and my background a little to some of the new members.> > As you know, my name is Rhonda but most of my friends call me Rhondie. I am 39 years old, pisces earth monkey living on the east coast of New South Wales, Australia, roughly half way between Sydney & Brisbane, near Coffs Harbour, with my (nearly) 15yo son Nick and our (nearly) 17 yo boarder . has been like a brother to Nick their whole lives and his mother Helen is my best friend, so we are like our own little "quasi" family. I'm a bit of a hippy at heart and believe global healing will be our salvation on earth.> > I find much support from my immediate circle of friends who are all very spiritually minded people and a blessing to have in my life.> > My earliest childhood was full of domestic violence and abuse and my brothers and I were all dragged out of bed by my father and made to witness my mother being beaten on a regular basis until my parents got divorced when I was 5. I don't remember much of that, but I do recall the screaming matches between them on the front lawn when dad would come to pick us up for the weekend. My mother was always very vocal with her criticisms of him and quite often would fly into a tirade even at the mention of his name. They both used us as pawns in their bloody battle against each other.> > My dad went on to abuse my stepmother in their earlier years together and my stepfather turned out to be yet another abuser of my mum. At the age of 17 my stepdad inadvertently dragged me into one of his drunken disputes with her (she hated alcohol) which erupted into physical violence and all I could do was try and get this man (who'd been like a father) off my mother. I copped a couple of punches to the head for my trouble, but I got her out of there. He wouldn't let us drive out of the driveway, but the violence stopped. Of course she went back and he did eventually learn to control himself to the point where he'd just put holes in walls, but in, all she endured far too many broken bones and black eyes and fear in her life for my liking.> > > Mum harboured a lot of bitterness and was a very hard task master. It seemed that nothing we did was ever good enough for her. That did eventually change throughout the years and she learned to drop her expectations of us and just love us for the beautiful spiritual adults we became. I had a couple of major confrontations with her over the years regarding her expectations and judgements especially during my struggle to "cut the apron strings" and live my own life. Inevitably I came to understand that she did the absolute best she could with the knowledge and awareness that she had at the time. The same holds true for my dad and my stepdad and this is how I have come to forgive them and myself over the years.> > I have experienced several different types of therapy/healing teqhniques/psychic development workshops over the years including rebirthing, crystal healing, body magik, psychometry and have been reading tarot since my son was a baby. I have explored many different spiritual philosophies over the years and am always open to new experiences and learning. Louise Hay and Shirley Maclaine were influential in my earlier days of empowerment, as was Dawn Hill and Ruth Montgomery.> > My mum passed away unexpectedly in December last year not quite 57 years of age. Although she went blessedly quickly from heart failure, and I am joyous that she has graduated, the shock of her passing without warning, without saying goodbye, without telling her I love her and without thanking her, has been huge and I'm now just starting to come out the other side of the most intense grief I've ever experienced. She had become my rock and my best friend. > > Surprisingly enough, my dad has stepped up to the plate and is more supportive now than he ever has been in our lives and my beloved younger brother is finally getting some much needed support. My two brothers, my stepsister and my youngest (half) brother and I are all bonded in our childhood experiences together and there is a lot of love, forgiveness and acceptance between us and we realise that mum was the butter that held us all together. Before she died, she was our common denominator as we all lived very seperate lives but mum insisted we always get together at easter or christmas or someones birthday if she could. She organised our family get togethers. She always referred to us as "you children" even though we're all adults and I realise in my heart, we are all still children, it's funny cos we always said "us kids" in reference to ourselves in conversation with her or dad or each other! We still do. Gee, I could write a book I suppose! > > Anyway, I share with you only part perception of my unique experience here thus far, and I think I've done so because it sheds light as to why I'm drawn to this group perhaps, and I think it has to do with forgiveness. Forgiving our mother, our father, our abusers and most importantly our selves. Moving forward with love and lightness of spirit is not always an easy thing to accomplish, but it is specifically through our unique experiences that we have the opportunity to embody the emotional and spiritual understanding of our lessons here. (I believe anyway, and this works for me)> > My life has been monumentally upended in the last twelve months and the changes have been one after the next in such rapid succession so as to have left me totally reeling and shellshocked for a few months.......(worse than any smack in the jaw I ever had as a teenager, at least I recovered quickly -in earth terms- from that!! lol) > > Basically in a nutshell, my partner (of 2years) and I split up this time last year. I lost my job in November. My mum died in December. January my rental house went up for sale and my son's mobile phone bill came in at $500, but still no work. February my cousin shot himself and I wrote my car off on the way to his farewell, I have mums car in the driveway now. March I moved house, still no job. April and Easter I went to mums, but spent everyday at the hospital with my brother who was in the psychiatric ward at that time, May I finally got a job and met a beautiful woman, but my kitten was hit by a car and had to be put down the day I started. What a year it's been!! Incredibly up and down! > > I believe everything is unfolding perfectly as it should and I have faith that I am right where I need to be at this point in time for good or bad.> > If you'd like to check out my poetic ramblings, I posted "Neptune Dreaming" through the group a couple of months ago and I also have a myspace page which is www.myspace.com/rhondiel where I have posted it and a few other funny bits and pieces. I have pics of my self and my family that I'm proud to share with any one who cares to look.> > Anyway, this is such an amazing group and my love thoughts and prayers go out to all of you. , I pray for healing for you and your children, I know how it feels to be seperated from those you love and I know how it feels to have your head filled with poisionous thoughts as a child, that one parent has towards the other, so I'm sending much love your way. Laurie, I pray continually for you to be pain free and I pray for love, light and healing for everyone.> > Love & Light,> Rhonda> > > > ____________________________________________________________________________________> Bored stiff? Loosen up... > Download and play hundreds of games for free on Games.> http://games./games/front>

[Guest guest]

Hi Rhondie

welcome back sweet Angel

your story really made me sad

i think you are very couragious to

share this with us all and a strong

person sending you lots of love & strength

namaste

kate

> >

> > Hello to so many new members!!

> >

> > Thank you Debbie for such a warm welcome back, I have read your

> messages through the group and I just wanted to let you know my

brain

> not only reads but also writes dyslexic as well, (although I'm in

no way

> multi lingual!! lol)

> >

> > I thought that perhaps now is a good time to intoduce my self

and my

> background a little to some of the new members.

> >

> > As you know, my name is Rhonda but most of my friends call me

Rhondie.

> I am 39 years old, pisces earth monkey living on the east coast of

New

> South Wales, Australia, roughly half way between Sydney &

Brisbane, near

> Coffs Harbour, with my (nearly) 15yo son Nick and our (nearly) 17

yo

> boarder . has been like a brother to Nick their whole

lives

> and his mother Helen is my best friend, so we are like our own

little

> " quasi " family. I'm a bit of a hippy at heart and believe global

healing

> will be our salvation on earth.

> >

> > I find much support from my immediate circle of friends who are

all

> very spiritually minded people and a blessing to have in my life.

> >

> > My earliest childhood was full of domestic violence and abuse

and my

> brothers and I were all dragged out of bed by my father and made to

> witness my mother being beaten on a regular basis until my parents

got

> divorced when I was 5. I don't remember much of that, but I do

recall

> the screaming matches between them on the front lawn when dad

would come

> to pick us up for the weekend. My mother was always very vocal

with her

> criticisms of him and quite often would fly into a tirade even at

the

> mention of his name. They both used us as pawns in their bloody

battle

> against each other.

> >

> > My dad went on to abuse my stepmother in their earlier years

together

> and my stepfather turned out to be yet another abuser of my mum.

At the

> age of 17 my stepdad inadvertently dragged me into one of his

drunken

> disputes with her (she hated alcohol) which erupted into physical

> violence and all I could do was try and get this man (who'd been

like a

> father) off my mother. I copped a couple of punches to the head

for my

> trouble, but I got her out of there. He wouldn't let us drive out

of the

> driveway, but the violence stopped. Of course she went back and he

did

> eventually learn to control himself to the point where he'd just

put

> holes in walls, but in, all she endured far too many broken bones

and

> black eyes and fear in her life for my liking.

> >

> >

> > Mum harboured a lot of bitterness and was a very hard task

master. It

> seemed that nothing we did was ever good enough for her. That did

> eventually change throughout the years and she learned to drop her

> expectations of us and just love us for the beautiful spiritual

adults

> we became. I had a couple of major confrontations with her over the

> years regarding her expectations and judgements especially during

my

> struggle to " cut the apron strings " and live my own life.

Inevitably I

> came to understand that she did the absolute best she could with

the

> knowledge and awareness that she had at the time. The same holds

true

> for my dad and my stepdad and this is how I have come to forgive

them

> and myself over the years.

> >

> > I have experienced several different types of therapy/healing

> teqhniques/psychic development workshops over the years including

> rebirthing, crystal healing, body magik, psychometry and have been

> reading tarot since my son was a baby. I have explored many

different

> spiritual philosophies over the years and am always open to new

> experiences and learning. Louise Hay and Shirley Maclaine were

> influential in my earlier days of empowerment, as was Dawn Hill

and Ruth

> Montgomery.

> >

> > My mum passed away unexpectedly in December last year not quite

57

> years of age. Although she went blessedly quickly from heart

failure,

> and I am joyous that she has graduated, the shock of her passing

without

> warning, without saying goodbye, without telling her I love her and

> without thanking her, has been huge and I'm now just starting to

come

> out the other side of the most intense grief I've ever

experienced. She

> had become my rock and my best friend.

> >

> > Surprisingly enough, my dad has stepped up to the plate and is

more

> supportive now than he ever has been in our lives and my beloved

younger

> brother is finally getting some much needed support. My two

brothers, my

> stepsister and my youngest (half) brother and I are all bonded in

our

> childhood experiences together and there is a lot of love,

forgiveness

> and acceptance between us and we realise that mum was the butter

that

> held us all together. Before she died, she was our common

denominator as

> we all lived very seperate lives but mum insisted we always get

together

> at easter or christmas or someones birthday if she could. She

organised

> our family get togethers. She always referred to us as " you

children "

> even though we're all adults and I realise in my heart, we are all

still

> children, it's funny cos we always said " us kids " in reference to

> ourselves in conversation with her or dad or each other! We still

do.

> Gee, I could write a book I suppose!

> >

> > Anyway, I share with you only part perception of my unique

experience

> here thus far, and I think I've done so because it sheds light as

to why

> I'm drawn to this group perhaps, and I think it has to do with

> forgiveness. Forgiving our mother, our father, our abusers and most

> importantly our selves. Moving forward with love and lightness of

spirit

> is not always an easy thing to accomplish, but it is specifically

> through our unique experiences that we have the opportunity to

embody

> the emotional and spiritual understanding of our lessons here. (I

> believe anyway, and this works for me)

> >

> > My life has been monumentally upended in the last twelve months

and

> the changes have been one after the next in such rapid succession

so as

> to have left me totally reeling and shellshocked for a few

> months.......(worse than any smack in the jaw I ever had as a

teenager,

> at least I recovered quickly -in earth terms- from that!! lol)

> >

> > Basically in a nutshell, my partner (of 2years) and I split up

this

> time last year. I lost my job in November. My mum died in December.

> January my rental house went up for sale and my son's mobile phone

bill

> came in at $500, but still no work. February my cousin shot

himself and

> I wrote my car off on the way to his farewell, I have mums car in

the

> driveway now. March I moved house, still no job. April and Easter

I went

> to mums, but spent everyday at the hospital with my brother who

was in

> the psychiatric ward at that time, May I finally got a job and met

a

> beautiful woman, but my kitten was hit by a car and had to be put

down

> the day I started. What a year it's been!! Incredibly up and down!

> >

> > I believe everything is unfolding perfectly as it should and I

have

> faith that I am right where I need to be at this point in time for

good

> or bad.

> >

> > If you'd like to check out my poetic ramblings, I posted " Neptune

> Dreaming " through the group a couple of months ago and I also have

a

> myspace page which is www.myspace.com/rhondiel where I have posted

it

> and a few other funny bits and pieces. I have pics of my self and

my

> family that I'm proud to share with any one who cares to look.

> >

> > Anyway, this is such an amazing group and my love thoughts and

prayers

> go out to all of you. , I pray for healing for you and your

> children, I know how it feels to be seperated from those you love

and I

> know how it feels to have your head filled with poisionous

thoughts as a

> child, that one parent has towards the other, so I'm sending much

love

> your way. Laurie, I pray continually for you to be pain free and I

pray

> for love, light and healing for everyone.

> >

> > Love & Light,

> > Rhonda

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

_____________________________________________________________________

___\

> ____________

> > Bored stiff? Loosen up...

> > Download and play hundreds of games for free on Games.

> > http://games./games/front

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Stefanie and Rhonda

Both your stories touched my heart and I feel for you. I am 34 years

old and I too had a troubled childhood, my father was very abusive to

my mum, my brother, my sister and I.

I believe that in life we have two choices:

To remain a victim or become a survivor.

We can only become survivors if we learn to forgive and stop the past

block our thoughts and actions in the present.

It takes time and some circumstances can trigger a memory but

replacing bad memories with fresh positive ones helps.

I am so proud of my mum who found the courage to leave my dad after

20 years of abuse.

Unfortunately, my brother who is now 33 years old and has been a drug

addict for 16 years, he is very abusive himself and is currently

still living with my mym and sister in Portugal.

My mum feels sorry for him and hopes that he will get better but I

know this will never happen.

I am trying to convince my mum and sister to get out of there and

come to live near me in England. But their life is there, why should

they have to leave if they do not want to? It is my brother than

does not belong there. He refuses to leave and my mum is to scared

to confront him. My sister who is 19 has already left once but came

back as she had nowhere to go.

I am learning to forgive but how can I forgive my brother for beating

my mum and sister and destroying their home?

Lucky am I for being here at least safe from abusive environment, I

am blessed with a wonderful husband but feel powerless as I cannot do

more for my sister and mum.

I think you both are so brave and wonderful people to taking charge

of your lives and doing something positive with and still finding the

time to help others.

May your present and future be blessed always.

Lots of hugs to you.

Love and light

Isabel

(Angel of Love)

> >

> > Hello to so many new members!!

> >

> > Thank you Debbie for such a warm welcome back, I have read your

> messages through the group and I just wanted to let you know my

brain

> not only reads but also writes dyslexic as well, (although I'm in

no way

> multi lingual!! lol)

> >

> > I thought that perhaps now is a good time to intoduce my self and

my

> background a little to some of the new members.

> >

> > As you know, my name is Rhonda but most of my friends call me

Rhondie.

> I am 39 years old, pisces earth monkey living on the east coast of

New

> South Wales, Australia, roughly half way between Sydney & Brisbane,

near

> Coffs Harbour, with my (nearly) 15yo son Nick and our (nearly) 17 yo

> boarder . has been like a brother to Nick their whole

lives

> and his mother Helen is my best friend, so we are like our own

little

> " quasi " family. I'm a bit of a hippy at heart and believe global

healing

> will be our salvation on earth.

> >

> > I find much support from my immediate circle of friends who are

all

> very spiritually minded people and a blessing to have in my life.

> >

> > My earliest childhood was full of domestic violence and abuse and

my

> brothers and I were all dragged out of bed by my father and made to

> witness my mother being beaten on a regular basis until my parents

got

> divorced when I was 5. I don't remember much of that, but I do

recall

> the screaming matches between them on the front lawn when dad would

come

> to pick us up for the weekend. My mother was always very vocal with

her

> criticisms of him and quite often would fly into a tirade even at

the

> mention of his name. They both used us as pawns in their bloody

battle

> against each other.

> >

> > My dad went on to abuse my stepmother in their earlier years

together

> and my stepfather turned out to be yet another abuser of my mum. At

the

> age of 17 my stepdad inadvertently dragged me into one of his

drunken

> disputes with her (she hated alcohol) which erupted into physical

> violence and all I could do was try and get this man (who'd been

like a

> father) off my mother. I copped a couple of punches to the head for

my

> trouble, but I got her out of there. He wouldn't let us drive out

of the

> driveway, but the violence stopped. Of course she went back and he

did

> eventually learn to control himself to the point where he'd just put

> holes in walls, but in, all she endured far too many broken bones

and

> black eyes and fear in her life for my liking.

> >

> >

> > Mum harboured a lot of bitterness and was a very hard task

master. It

> seemed that nothing we did was ever good enough for her. That did

> eventually change throughout the years and she learned to drop her

> expectations of us and just love us for the beautiful spiritual

adults

> we became. I had a couple of major confrontations with her over the

> years regarding her expectations and judgements especially during my

> struggle to " cut the apron strings " and live my own life.

Inevitably I

> came to understand that she did the absolute best she could with the

> knowledge and awareness that she had at the time. The same holds

true

> for my dad and my stepdad and this is how I have come to forgive

them

> and myself over the years.

> >

> > I have experienced several different types of therapy/healing

> teqhniques/psychic development workshops over the years including

> rebirthing, crystal healing, body magik, psychometry and have been

> reading tarot since my son was a baby. I have explored many

different

> spiritual philosophies over the years and am always open to new

> experiences and learning. Louise Hay and Shirley Maclaine were

> influential in my earlier days of empowerment, as was Dawn Hill and

Ruth

> Montgomery.

> >

> > My mum passed away unexpectedly in December last year not quite 57

> years of age. Although she went blessedly quickly from heart

failure,

> and I am joyous that she has graduated, the shock of her passing

without

> warning, without saying goodbye, without telling her I love her and

> without thanking her, has been huge and I'm now just starting to

come

> out the other side of the most intense grief I've ever experienced.

She

> had become my rock and my best friend.

> >

> > Surprisingly enough, my dad has stepped up to the plate and is

more

> supportive now than he ever has been in our lives and my beloved

younger

> brother is finally getting some much needed support. My two

brothers, my

> stepsister and my youngest (half) brother and I are all bonded in

our

> childhood experiences together and there is a lot of love,

forgiveness

> and acceptance between us and we realise that mum was the butter

that

> held us all together. Before she died, she was our common

denominator as

> we all lived very seperate lives but mum insisted we always get

together

> at easter or christmas or someones birthday if she could. She

organised

> our family get togethers. She always referred to us as " you

children "

> even though we're all adults and I realise in my heart, we are all

still

> children, it's funny cos we always said " us kids " in reference to

> ourselves in conversation with her or dad or each other! We still

do.

> Gee, I could write a book I suppose!

> >

> > Anyway, I share with you only part perception of my unique

experience

> here thus far, and I think I've done so because it sheds light as

to why

> I'm drawn to this group perhaps, and I think it has to do with

> forgiveness. Forgiving our mother, our father, our abusers and most

> importantly our selves. Moving forward with love and lightness of

spirit

> is not always an easy thing to accomplish, but it is specifically

> through our unique experiences that we have the opportunity to

embody

> the emotional and spiritual understanding of our lessons here. (I

> believe anyway, and this works for me)

> >

> > My life has been monumentally upended in the last twelve months

and

> the changes have been one after the next in such rapid succession

so as

> to have left me totally reeling and shellshocked for a few

> months.......(worse than any smack in the jaw I ever had as a

teenager,

> at least I recovered quickly -in earth terms- from that!! lol)

> >

> > Basically in a nutshell, my partner (of 2years) and I split up

this

> time last year. I lost my job in November. My mum died in December.

> January my rental house went up for sale and my son's mobile phone

bill

> came in at $500, but still no work. February my cousin shot himself

and

> I wrote my car off on the way to his farewell, I have mums car in

the

> driveway now. March I moved house, still no job. April and Easter I

went

> to mums, but spent everyday at the hospital with my brother who was

in

> the psychiatric ward at that time, May I finally got a job and met a

> beautiful woman, but my kitten was hit by a car and had to be put

down

> the day I started. What a year it's been!! Incredibly up and down!

> >

> > I believe everything is unfolding perfectly as it should and I

have

> faith that I am right where I need to be at this point in time for

good

> or bad.

> >

> > If you'd like to check out my poetic ramblings, I posted " Neptune

> Dreaming " through the group a couple of months ago and I also have a

> myspace page which is www.myspace.com/rhondiel where I have posted

it

> and a few other funny bits and pieces. I have pics of my self and my

> family that I'm proud to share with any one who cares to look.

> >

> > Anyway, this is such an amazing group and my love thoughts and

prayers

> go out to all of you. , I pray for healing for you and your

> children, I know how it feels to be seperated from those you love

and I

> know how it feels to have your head filled with poisionous thoughts

as a

> child, that one parent has towards the other, so I'm sending much

love

> your way. Laurie, I pray continually for you to be pain free and I

pray

> for love, light and healing for everyone.

> >

> > Love & Light,

> > Rhonda

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

______________________________________________________________________

__\

> ____________

> > Bored stiff? Loosen up...

> > Download and play hundreds of games for free on Games.

> > http://games./games/front

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Warm greetings beautiful Isabel! It's amazing at how a childhood like that can shape a person huh? It can either make them much stronger and more of a humanitarian. Or can trap someone on the same path as the abuser. It's really too bad for your brother. I can feel your sadness. My brother too still has his walls up and dwells in the anger. He feels like the people in this world who hurt us, owe us something. He doesn't get it yet. Sometimes I wish I could just plug him in to a different world just to show him how it could be so much better for him. But that's his job alone to find the path he's supposed to travel. Same with your brother. He might realize his behavior one day and decide to change. Sadly, it's his decision alone. In the meantime you and your family should keep yourselves out of harms way. And NEVER feel guilty about it. Your mother is SO courageous! My love to her!Please let your sister know everyday how important she is to you, and how much she's worth as a human being. Some women will "settle" with the wrong man because that's all they ever knew. Please let her know that that's NOT true. And she constantly deeply loved. Forgiving is the most powerful healing tool we come equipped with. I agree. To forgive is to set yourself free of the past and the emotions keeping you a prisoner. has a very beautiful "Ramble on Forgiveness":http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view & friendID=81670413 & blogID=277763465My love to you Isabel, and thank you for sharing your touching story with the group. And thank you for letting yourself heal and grow into a beautiful person, in return being in service to others who need healing. That's what this group is all about. Thank you for contributing your light. Endless love and blessings to you,Stefanie> > >> > > Hello to so many new members!!> > >> > > Thank you Debbie for such a warm welcome back, I have read your> > messages through the group and I just wanted to let you know my > brain> > not only reads but also writes dyslexic as well, (although I'm in > no way> > multi lingual!! lol)> > >> > > I thought that perhaps now is a good time to intoduce my self and > my> > background a little to some of the new members.> > >> > > As you know, my name is Rhonda but most of my friends call me > Rhondie.> > I am 39 years old, pisces earth monkey living on the east coast of > New> > South Wales, Australia, roughly half way between Sydney & Brisbane, > near> > Coffs Harbour, with my (nearly) 15yo son Nick and our (nearly) 17 yo> > boarder . has been like a brother to Nick their whole > lives> > and his mother Helen is my best friend, so we are like our own > little> > "quasi" family. I'm a bit of a hippy at heart and believe global > healing> > will be our salvation on earth.> > >> > > I find much support from my immediate circle of friends who are > all> > very spiritually minded people and a blessing to have in my life.> > >> > > My earliest childhood was full of domestic violence and abuse and > my> > brothers and I were all dragged out of bed by my father and made to> > witness my mother being beaten on a regular basis until my parents > got> > divorced when I was 5. I don't remember much of that, but I do > recall> > the screaming matches between them on the front lawn when dad would > come> > to pick us up for the weekend. My mother was always very vocal with > her> > criticisms of him and quite often would fly into a tirade even at > the> > mention of his name. They both used us as pawns in their bloody > battle> > against each other.> > >> > > My dad went on to abuse my stepmother in their earlier years > together> > and my stepfather turned out to be yet another abuser of my mum. At > the> > age of 17 my stepdad inadvertently dragged me into one of his > drunken> > disputes with her (she hated alcohol) which erupted into physical> > violence and all I could do was try and get this man (who'd been > like a> > father) off my mother. I copped a couple of punches to the head for > my> > trouble, but I got her out of there. He wouldn't let us drive out > of the> > driveway, but the violence stopped. Of course she went back and he > did> > eventually learn to control himself to the point where he'd just put> > holes in walls, but in, all she endured far too many broken bones > and> > black eyes and fear in her life for my liking.> > >> > >> > > Mum harboured a lot of bitterness and was a very hard task > master. It> > seemed that nothing we did was ever good enough for her. That did> > eventually change throughout the years and she learned to drop her> > expectations of us and just love us for the beautiful spiritual > adults> > we became. I had a couple of major confrontations with her over the> > years regarding her expectations and judgements especially during my> > struggle to "cut the apron strings" and live my own life. > Inevitably I> > came to understand that she did the absolute best she could with the> > knowledge and awareness that she had at the time. The same holds > true> > for my dad and my stepdad and this is how I have come to forgive > them> > and myself over the years.> > >> > > I have experienced several different types of therapy/healing> > teqhniques/psychic development workshops over the years including> > rebirthing, crystal healing, body magik, psychometry and have been> > reading tarot since my son was a baby. I have explored many > different> > spiritual philosophies over the years and am always open to new> > experiences and learning. Louise Hay and Shirley Maclaine were> > influential in my earlier days of empowerment, as was Dawn Hill and > Ruth> > Montgomery.> > >> > > My mum passed away unexpectedly in December last year not quite 57> > years of age. Although she went blessedly quickly from heart > failure,> > and I am joyous that she has graduated, the shock of her passing > without> > warning, without saying goodbye, without telling her I love her and> > without thanking her, has been huge and I'm now just starting to > come> > out the other side of the most intense grief I've ever experienced. > She> > had become my rock and my best friend.> > >> > > Surprisingly enough, my dad has stepped up to the plate and is > more> > supportive now than he ever has been in our lives and my beloved > younger> > brother is finally getting some much needed support. My two > brothers, my> > stepsister and my youngest (half) brother and I are all bonded in > our> > childhood experiences together and there is a lot of love, > forgiveness> > and acceptance between us and we realise that mum was the butter > that> > held us all together. Before she died, she was our common > denominator as> > we all lived very seperate lives but mum insisted we always get > together> > at easter or christmas or someones birthday if she could. She > organised> > our family get togethers. She always referred to us as "you > children"> > even though we're all adults and I realise in my heart, we are all > still> > children, it's funny cos we always said "us kids" in reference to> > ourselves in conversation with her or dad or each other! We still > do.> > Gee, I could write a book I suppose!> > >> > > Anyway, I share with you only part perception of my unique > experience> > here thus far, and I think I've done so because it sheds light as > to why> > I'm drawn to this group perhaps, and I think it has to do with> > forgiveness. Forgiving our mother, our father, our abusers and most> > importantly our selves. Moving forward with love and lightness of > spirit> > is not always an easy thing to accomplish, but it is specifically> > through our unique experiences that we have the opportunity to > embody> > the emotional and spiritual understanding of our lessons here. (I> > believe anyway, and this works for me)> > >> > > My life has been monumentally upended in the last twelve months > and> > the changes have been one after the next in such rapid succession > so as> > to have left me totally reeling and shellshocked for a few> > months.......(worse than any smack in the jaw I ever had as a > teenager,> > at least I recovered quickly -in earth terms- from that!! lol)> > >> > > Basically in a nutshell, my partner (of 2years) and I split up > this> > time last year. I lost my job in November. My mum died in December.> > January my rental house went up for sale and my son's mobile phone > bill> > came in at $500, but still no work. February my cousin shot himself > and> > I wrote my car off on the way to his farewell, I have mums car in > the> > driveway now. March I moved house, still no job. April and Easter I > went> > to mums, but spent everyday at the hospital with my brother who was > in> > the psychiatric ward at that time, May I finally got a job and met a> > beautiful woman, but my kitten was hit by a car and had to be put > down> > the day I started. What a year it's been!! Incredibly up and down!> > >> > > I believe everything is unfolding perfectly as it should and I > have> > faith that I am right where I need to be at this point in time for > good> > or bad.> > >> > > If you'd like to check out my poetic ramblings, I posted "Neptune> > Dreaming" through the group a couple of months ago and I also have a> > myspace page which is www.myspace.com/rhondiel where I have posted > it> > and a few other funny bits and pieces. I have pics of my self and my> > family that I'm proud to share with any one who cares to look.> > >> > > Anyway, this is such an amazing group and my love thoughts and > prayers> > go out to all of you. , I pray for healing for you and your> > children, I know how it feels to be seperated from those you love > and I> > know how it feels to have your head filled with poisionous thoughts > as a> > child, that one parent has towards the other, so I'm sending much > love> > your way. Laurie, I pray continually for you to be pain free and I > pray> > for love, light and healing for everyone.> > >> > > Love & Light,> > > Rhonda> > >> > >> > >> > >> > > ______________________________________________________________________> __\> > ____________> > > Bored stiff? Loosen up...> > > Download and play hundreds of games for free on Games.> > > http://games./games/front> > >> >>

[Guest guest]

Thank you for your kind words Stefanie, you are trully amazing.

I think that feeling you are not alone in making a good thing out of

bad situation makes us stronger. This is our choice, who we are and

we choose Love above it all.

Together as One

Lots of hugs

Isabel

> > > >

> > > > Hello to so many new members!!

> > > >

> > > > Thank you Debbie for such a warm welcome back, I have read

your

> > > messages through the group and I just wanted to let you know my

> > brain

> > > not only reads but also writes dyslexic as well, (although I'm

in

> > no way

> > > multi lingual!! lol)

> > > >

> > > > I thought that perhaps now is a good time to intoduce my self

and

> > my

> > > background a little to some of the new members.

> > > >

> > > > As you know, my name is Rhonda but most of my friends call me

> > Rhondie.

> > > I am 39 years old, pisces earth monkey living on the east coast

of

> > New

> > > South Wales, Australia, roughly half way between Sydney &

Brisbane,

> > near

> > > Coffs Harbour, with my (nearly) 15yo son Nick and our (nearly)

17 yo

> > > boarder . has been like a brother to Nick their whole

> > lives

> > > and his mother Helen is my best friend, so we are like our own

> > little

> > > " quasi " family. I'm a bit of a hippy at heart and believe global

> > healing

> > > will be our salvation on earth.

> > > >

> > > > I find much support from my immediate circle of friends who

are

> > all

> > > very spiritually minded people and a blessing to have in my

life.

> > > >

> > > > My earliest childhood was full of domestic violence and abuse

and

> > my

> > > brothers and I were all dragged out of bed by my father and

made to

> > > witness my mother being beaten on a regular basis until my

parents

> > got

> > > divorced when I was 5. I don't remember much of that, but I do

> > recall

> > > the screaming matches between them on the front lawn when dad

would

> > come

> > > to pick us up for the weekend. My mother was always very vocal

with

> > her

> > > criticisms of him and quite often would fly into a tirade even

at

> > the

> > > mention of his name. They both used us as pawns in their bloody

> > battle

> > > against each other.

> > > >

> > > > My dad went on to abuse my stepmother in their earlier years

> > together

> > > and my stepfather turned out to be yet another abuser of my

mum. At

> > the

> > > age of 17 my stepdad inadvertently dragged me into one of his

> > drunken

> > > disputes with her (she hated alcohol) which erupted into

physical

> > > violence and all I could do was try and get this man (who'd been

> > like a

> > > father) off my mother. I copped a couple of punches to the head

for

> > my

> > > trouble, but I got her out of there. He wouldn't let us drive

out

> > of the

> > > driveway, but the violence stopped. Of course she went back and

he

> > did

> > > eventually learn to control himself to the point where he'd

just put

> > > holes in walls, but in, all she endured far too many broken

bones

> > and

> > > black eyes and fear in her life for my liking.

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > Mum harboured a lot of bitterness and was a very hard task

> > master. It

> > > seemed that nothing we did was ever good enough for her. That

did

> > > eventually change throughout the years and she learned to drop

her

> > > expectations of us and just love us for the beautiful spiritual

> > adults

> > > we became. I had a couple of major confrontations with her over

the

> > > years regarding her expectations and judgements especially

during my

> > > struggle to " cut the apron strings " and live my own life.

> > Inevitably I

> > > came to understand that she did the absolute best she could

with the

> > > knowledge and awareness that she had at the time. The same holds

> > true

> > > for my dad and my stepdad and this is how I have come to forgive

> > them

> > > and myself over the years.

> > > >

> > > > I have experienced several different types of therapy/healing

> > > teqhniques/psychic development workshops over the years

including

> > > rebirthing, crystal healing, body magik, psychometry and have

been

> > > reading tarot since my son was a baby. I have explored many

> > different

> > > spiritual philosophies over the years and am always open to new

> > > experiences and learning. Louise Hay and Shirley Maclaine were

> > > influential in my earlier days of empowerment, as was Dawn Hill

and

> > Ruth

> > > Montgomery.

> > > >

> > > > My mum passed away unexpectedly in December last year not

quite 57

> > > years of age. Although she went blessedly quickly from heart

> > failure,

> > > and I am joyous that she has graduated, the shock of her passing

> > without

> > > warning, without saying goodbye, without telling her I love her

and

> > > without thanking her, has been huge and I'm now just starting to

> > come

> > > out the other side of the most intense grief I've ever

experienced.

> > She

> > > had become my rock and my best friend.

> > > >

> > > > Surprisingly enough, my dad has stepped up to the plate and is

> > more

> > > supportive now than he ever has been in our lives and my beloved

> > younger

> > > brother is finally getting some much needed support. My two

> > brothers, my

> > > stepsister and my youngest (half) brother and I are all bonded

in

> > our

> > > childhood experiences together and there is a lot of love,

> > forgiveness

> > > and acceptance between us and we realise that mum was the butter

> > that

> > > held us all together. Before she died, she was our common

> > denominator as

> > > we all lived very seperate lives but mum insisted we always get

> > together

> > > at easter or christmas or someones birthday if she could. She

> > organised

> > > our family get togethers. She always referred to us as " you

> > children "

> > > even though we're all adults and I realise in my heart, we are

all

> > still

> > > children, it's funny cos we always said " us kids " in reference

to

> > > ourselves in conversation with her or dad or each other! We

still

> > do.

> > > Gee, I could write a book I suppose!

> > > >

> > > > Anyway, I share with you only part perception of my unique

> > experience

> > > here thus far, and I think I've done so because it sheds light

as

> > to why

> > > I'm drawn to this group perhaps, and I think it has to do with

> > > forgiveness. Forgiving our mother, our father, our abusers and

most

> > > importantly our selves. Moving forward with love and lightness

of

> > spirit

> > > is not always an easy thing to accomplish, but it is

specifically

> > > through our unique experiences that we have the opportunity to

> > embody

> > > the emotional and spiritual understanding of our lessons here.

(I

> > > believe anyway, and this works for me)

> > > >

> > > > My life has been monumentally upended in the last twelve

months

> > and

> > > the changes have been one after the next in such rapid

succession

> > so as

> > > to have left me totally reeling and shellshocked for a few

> > > months.......(worse than any smack in the jaw I ever had as a

> > teenager,

> > > at least I recovered quickly -in earth terms- from that!! lol)

> > > >

> > > > Basically in a nutshell, my partner (of 2years) and I split up

> > this

> > > time last year. I lost my job in November. My mum died in

December.

> > > January my rental house went up for sale and my son's mobile

phone

> > bill

> > > came in at $500, but still no work. February my cousin shot

himself

> > and

> > > I wrote my car off on the way to his farewell, I have mums car

in

> > the

> > > driveway now. March I moved house, still no job. April and

Easter I

> > went

> > > to mums, but spent everyday at the hospital with my brother who

was

> > in

> > > the psychiatric ward at that time, May I finally got a job and

met a

> > > beautiful woman, but my kitten was hit by a car and had to be

put

> > down

> > > the day I started. What a year it's been!! Incredibly up and

down!

> > > >

> > > > I believe everything is unfolding perfectly as it should and I

> > have

> > > faith that I am right where I need to be at this point in time

for

> > good

> > > or bad.

> > > >

> > > > If you'd like to check out my poetic ramblings, I

posted " Neptune

> > > Dreaming " through the group a couple of months ago and I also

have a

> > > myspace page which is www.myspace.com/rhondiel where I have

posted

> > it

> > > and a few other funny bits and pieces. I have pics of my self

and my

> > > family that I'm proud to share with any one who cares to look.

> > > >

> > > > Anyway, this is such an amazing group and my love thoughts and

> > prayers

> > > go out to all of you. , I pray for healing for you and

your

> > > children, I know how it feels to be seperated from those you

love

> > and I

> > > know how it feels to have your head filled with poisionous

thoughts

> > as a

> > > child, that one parent has towards the other, so I'm sending

much

> > love

> > > your way. Laurie, I pray continually for you to be pain free

and I

> > pray

> > > for love, light and healing for everyone.

> > > >

> > > > Love & Light,

> > > > Rhonda

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

______________________________________________________________________

> > __\

> > > ____________

> > > > Bored stiff? Loosen up...

> > > > Download and play hundreds of games for free on Games.

> > > > http://games./games/front

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks Isabel! You are very amazing too. Our job is to be here for one another so we don't feel lonely in our journeys. There's nothing stronger than oneness, and love.Lot's of hugs back to you beautiful!and never ending solidarity,Stefanie> > > > >> > > > > Hello to so many new members!!> > > > >> > > > > Thank you Debbie for such a warm welcome back, I have read > your> > > > messages through the group and I just wanted to let you know my> > > brain> > > > not only reads but also writes dyslexic as well, (although I'm > in> > > no way> > > > multi lingual!! lol)> > > > >> > > > > I thought that perhaps now is a good time to intoduce my self > and> > > my> > > > background a little to some of the new members.> > > > >> > > > > As you know, my name is Rhonda but most of my friends call me> > > Rhondie.> > > > I am 39 years old, pisces earth monkey living on the east coast > of> > > New> > > > South Wales, Australia, roughly half way between Sydney & > Brisbane,> > > near> > > > Coffs Harbour, with my (nearly) 15yo son Nick and our (nearly) > 17 yo> > > > boarder . has been like a brother to Nick their whole> > > lives> > > > and his mother Helen is my best friend, so we are like our own> > > little> > > > "quasi" family. I'm a bit of a hippy at heart and believe global> > > healing> > > > will be our salvation on earth.> > > > >> > > > > I find much support from my immediate circle of friends who > are> > > all> > > > very spiritually minded people and a blessing to have in my > life.> > > > >> > > > > My earliest childhood was full of domestic violence and abuse > and> > > my> > > > brothers and I were all dragged out of bed by my father and > made to> > > > witness my mother being beaten on a regular basis until my > parents> > > got> > > > divorced when I was 5. I don't remember much of that, but I do> > > recall> > > > the screaming matches between them on the front lawn when dad > would> > > come> > > > to pick us up for the weekend. My mother was always very vocal > with> > > her> > > > criticisms of him and quite often would fly into a tirade even > at> > > the> > > > mention of his name. They both used us as pawns in their bloody> > > battle> > > > against each other.> > > > >> > > > > My dad went on to abuse my stepmother in their earlier years> > > together> > > > and my stepfather turned out to be yet another abuser of my > mum. At> > > the> > > > age of 17 my stepdad inadvertently dragged me into one of his> > > drunken> > > > disputes with her (she hated alcohol) which erupted into > physical> > > > violence and all I could do was try and get this man (who'd been> > > like a> > > > father) off my mother. I copped a couple of punches to the head > for> > > my> > > > trouble, but I got her out of there. He wouldn't let us drive > out> > > of the> > > > driveway, but the violence stopped. Of course she went back and > he> > > did> > > > eventually learn to control himself to the point where he'd > just put> > > > holes in walls, but in, all she endured far too many broken > bones> > > and> > > > black eyes and fear in her life for my liking.> > > > >> > > > >> > > > > Mum harboured a lot of bitterness and was a very hard task> > > master. It> > > > seemed that nothing we did was ever good enough for her. That > did> > > > eventually change throughout the years and she learned to drop > her> > > > expectations of us and just love us for the beautiful spiritual> > > adults> > > > we became. I had a couple of major confrontations with her over > the> > > > years regarding her expectations and judgements especially > during my> > > > struggle to "cut the apron strings" and live my own life.> > > Inevitably I> > > > came to understand that she did the absolute best she could > with the> > > > knowledge and awareness that she had at the time. The same holds> > > true> > > > for my dad and my stepdad and this is how I have come to forgive> > > them> > > > and myself over the years.> > > > >> > > > > I have experienced several different types of therapy/healing> > > > teqhniques/psychic development workshops over the years > including> > > > rebirthing, crystal healing, body magik, psychometry and have > been> > > > reading tarot since my son was a baby. I have explored many> > > different> > > > spiritual philosophies over the years and am always open to new> > > > experiences and learning. Louise Hay and Shirley Maclaine were> > > > influential in my earlier days of empowerment, as was Dawn Hill > and> > > Ruth> > > > Montgomery.> > > > >> > > > > My mum passed away unexpectedly in December last year not > quite 57> > > > years of age. Although she went blessedly quickly from heart> > > failure,> > > > and I am joyous that she has graduated, the shock of her passing> > > without> > > > warning, without saying goodbye, without telling her I love her > and> > > > without thanking her, has been huge and I'm now just starting to> > > come> > > > out the other side of the most intense grief I've ever > experienced.> > > She> > > > had become my rock and my best friend.> > > > >> > > > > Surprisingly enough, my dad has stepped up to the plate and is> > > more> > > > supportive now than he ever has been in our lives and my beloved> > > younger> > > > brother is finally getting some much needed support. My two> > > brothers, my> > > > stepsister and my youngest (half) brother and I are all bonded > in> > > our> > > > childhood experiences together and there is a lot of love,> > > forgiveness> > > > and acceptance between us and we realise that mum was the butter> > > that> > > > held us all together. Before she died, she was our common> > > denominator as> > > > we all lived very seperate lives but mum insisted we always get> > > together> > > > at easter or christmas or someones birthday if she could. She> > > organised> > > > our family get togethers. She always referred to us as "you> > > children"> > > > even though we're all adults and I realise in my heart, we are > all> > > still> > > > children, it's funny cos we always said "us kids" in reference > to> > > > ourselves in conversation with her or dad or each other! We > still> > > do.> > > > Gee, I could write a book I suppose!> > > > >> > > > > Anyway, I share with you only part perception of my unique> > > experience> > > > here thus far, and I think I've done so because it sheds light > as> > > to why> > > > I'm drawn to this group perhaps, and I think it has to do with> > > > forgiveness. Forgiving our mother, our father, our abusers and > most> > > > importantly our selves. Moving forward with love and lightness > of> > > spirit> > > > is not always an easy thing to accomplish, but it is > specifically> > > > through our unique experiences that we have the opportunity to> > > embody> > > > the emotional and spiritual understanding of our lessons here. > (I> > > > believe anyway, and this works for me)> > > > >> > > > > My life has been monumentally upended in the last twelve > months> > > and> > > > the changes have been one after the next in such rapid > succession> > > so as> > > > to have left me totally reeling and shellshocked for a few> > > > months.......(worse than any smack in the jaw I ever had as a> > > teenager,> > > > at least I recovered quickly -in earth terms- from that!! lol)> > > > >> > > > > Basically in a nutshell, my partner (of 2years) and I split up> > > this> > > > time last year. I lost my job in November. My mum died in > December.> > > > January my rental house went up for sale and my son's mobile > phone> > > bill> > > > came in at $500, but still no work. February my cousin shot > himself> > > and> > > > I wrote my car off on the way to his farewell, I have mums car > in> > > the> > > > driveway now. March I moved house, still no job. April and > Easter I> > > went> > > > to mums, but spent everyday at the hospital with my brother who > was> > > in> > > > the psychiatric ward at that time, May I finally got a job and > met a> > > > beautiful woman, but my kitten was hit by a car and had to be > put> > > down> > > > the day I started. What a year it's been!! Incredibly up and > down!> > > > >> > > > > I believe everything is unfolding perfectly as it should and I> > > have> > > > faith that I am right where I need to be at this point in time > for> > > good> > > > or bad.> > > > >> > > > > If you'd like to check out my poetic ramblings, I > posted "Neptune> > > > Dreaming" through the group a couple of months ago and I also > have a> > > > myspace page which is www.myspace.com/rhondiel where I have > posted> > > it> > > > and a few other funny bits and pieces. I have pics of my self > and my> > > > family that I'm proud to share with any one who cares to look.> > > > >> > > > > Anyway, this is such an amazing group and my love thoughts and> > > prayers> > > > go out to all of you. , I pray for healing for you and > your> > > > children, I know how it feels to be seperated from those you > love> > > and I> > > > know how it feels to have your head filled with poisionous > thoughts> > > as a> > > > child, that one parent has towards the other, so I'm sending > much> > > love> > > > your way. Laurie, I pray continually for you to be pain free > and I> > > pray> > > > for love, light and healing for everyone.> > > > >> > > > > Love & Light,> > > > > Rhonda> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > >> > > > ______________________________________________________________________> > > __\> > > > ____________> > > > > Bored stiff? Loosen up...> > > > > Download and play hundreds of games for free on Games.> > > > > http://games./games/front> > > > >> > > >> > >> >>