Re: When You Get Home...

[Guest guest]

,

You are one amazing person...You really brought me into your

world. I felt as if I was the one driving the car, looking for that

destinaton but not knowing and realizing, after reading the end of

your stories...You just amaze me still!!! You are such a wonderful

person! I do believe, yes, everything does have a purpose as you so

eloquently stated in your true story at the end that all of the

circumstances in life do have a REAL purpose and reason, no matter if

it is " good " or " bad " ... Thank you for reminding me! Namaste! LUNA

>

> ( A true story)

>

>

> It's been more than 20 years ago now, when I had just left a

> relationship, which hadn't worked out.

>

> We had actually tried to work it out several times, but we were

just

> very different in our thinking and ideas. We parted mutually, and

on

> friendly terms, so much so even that we both left our apartment,

her

> going to her mother's and me...well, we'll get to that.

>

> We left the apartment just as it was, fully furnished, fully as if

we

> were coming back, and knew we weren't. Except for some clothes,

> everything else stayed. Furniture, tv's, personal effects...

>

> It was a time of self cleaning perhaps...none of it mattered, and

we

> welcomed each other to what they wanted...neither accepted...so it

> all stayed.

>

> I spent the next few days at a motel simply not caring if I made

> another choice or not. I pondered the different things I had tried,

> mostly failed at in one way or another. I felt drained, alone,

numb,

> uninspired.

>

> I spent time in self reflection and even self hatred. I had

millions

> of ideas yet they seemed so void of life...not that I hadn't had

some

> successes, maybe alot looking back, certainly many after, but I

> didn't care if I had another idea again, while pondering a new one,

> something, anything.

>

> After a few days I left the motel...out of money, out of

time...time

> for what I didn't have a clue. I had one small backpack, those kind

> you get in the military, with a few clothes.

>

> Talk about not having a clue...I didn't have the slightest idea

about

> what to do, where to go, what my plan was.....I had none....none

> whatsoever.

>

> Oh, sure, there were places I could have went...friends, family,

> relatives, etc... But it's like I was waiting for something.

>

> I found myself hours later on the interstate with my thumb out. Now

> if you want to know what a fool is, stop sometime to pick up a

hitch-

> hiker and ask him where he's going. If his reply is, " I'm not

> sure...I'll know when I'm there " . Run!!! Just kidding...

>

> I just went. Place to place, ride to ride. I stayed on the

interstate

> except to grab some sleep somewhere, anywhere, or to

eat...somewhere.

>

> A little knack I'd picked up long before made it alittle easier. I

> could approach a manager of a diner or at a motel and offer any

kind

> of work for a meal...for a room for the night to shower and get

some

> sleep...almost always worked well...Perhaps more than half the

time,

> they refused to hear of work/pay...more times than not I'd have an

> entire menu dumped out on the table, providing more for later, even

> money in the bottom of to go meals. Few nights were actually spent

> out in the open, yet, there were enough of them

>

> Maybe six weeks into this listless going, I had about decided to

try

> heading to Hollywood...I had a brother there I hadn't really spoke

to

> in years but the last I had heard, he was somewhere in the 7000-

8000

> block of Hollywood Blvd. Even then, that information could have

been

> very outdated, as he moved often back and forth between California,

> New York and England...he designed his own furniture as well as did

> some acting, well, a certain kind of acting. But I had no clue if

I'd

> even run into him...but at least I'd picked a point to head for.

>

> It was about this time, I think it was outside of Flagstaff. I had

> slept the night under a small bridge. It had started raining hard

> late into the night and I still hadn't found an exit for a motel

that

> would exchange work, even for an early check out...lots of out of

the

> country owners run those places, enough said.

>

> I had just, at that moment, reached the interstate roadway when a

car

> pulled over to give me a ride.

>

> It was an older car, full of people. Now, I've had alot of rides

and

> some can be much better than others...I learned to read people fast.

>

> There was one woman, in her mid twenties, along with three kids,

not

> all that old. Also, there were three other guys, which it turns out

> were all hitch-hiking, and she had picked them up along the way.

>

> The first thing ask me was " do you have any gas money, we're all

> pitching in as we can " ? You can just about see my hand on the door

> handle, already knowing I can not contribute to this request as

much

> as I would love to.

>

> I said how sorry I was that I didn't, I'd run out along time ago,

but

> they could help me if they could just put me out at the next exit

at

> least.

>

> She would hear none of that, just a friendly smile breaking across

a

> very pretty face hidden behind days of driving, decesions, stress

and

> more. " That's ok, we'll figure something out " , she said. Though I'm

> not sure the other guys liked that much.

>

> My feeling over the next little while was she was wanting to start

> dropping these guys off as close as she could to where they were

> going but she needed this to happen faster...it ended up that one

by

> one they all were let off to grab other rides...they were feeling

> they could do much better faster themselves than a woman trying to

> figure out all the things she must have been thinking about right

> then, her fuel situation, money and kids who were overheating ,

tired

> and hungry.

>

> I didn't try to pry but let her know that whenever she needed to

she

> could let me off, or if there was anything I could do to help I

> would, so much as it was.

>

> The next thing I know she's pulling into a shopping area beside a

> truck stop. She had agreed to call some family back in regard to

> getting some money wired to her so she could make it.

>

> Maybe it was her fatique. Maybe it was a feeling...she looked at me

> and ask if I'd mind keeping an eye on her children, and if I did,

> when she got the money, she'd get me further down the road.

Needless

> to say, I stayed. After all, where was I going anyway.

>

> It was hours before the money showed up and it wasn't even alot,

but

> it bought gas, got the kids fed, and feeling better. I had a coffee

> forced on me because I refused a meal, knowing it might be the

> difference in her getting to where she was going.

>

> Between the back and forth and waiting I had found out she had left

> her husband...very bad situation and won't go into it...but was on

> her way to Northern California, driving from, I think it was Ohio,

> non-stop. She had left in the middle of the night.

>

> Now why she happened to be on the southern route instead of way

north

> was only contributed to have getting lost several times, mind lost

in

> so many thoughts.

>

> I took over the driving so she could sleep and on into the night we

> went.

>

> It was sometime early in the morning, perhaps two, when we started

to

> enter " the grade " on I20. If you've driven to LA, from Palm Springs

I

> think it is, after you pass throught the wind farm there...you

start

> to desend from the high desert. It was about now that the car

seemed

> to be running faster, and faster, and faster still...it's like the

> gas was being pressed to the floor more and more and more.

>

> Even as I started applying the brakes, it got faster. Now, going

> somewhere in the neighborhood of 80 mph, I'm using my right foot to

> try to feel out the pedal for maybe something caught on it, faster

we

> go...90...I'm pressing the brakes harder now...just a heaviness,

> faster....96....the engine racing so loudly it wakes the rest up

> wondering what's happening...faster still... 101....just topping

the

> last " hope " , the last and only, what you could say was the last

> chance, before this road went down hill, literally,

from " here " ...and

> there would be no stopping this thing then.

>

> The weight of the heavy car, 106mph, the engine screaming and a

grade

> that makes the best very alert and riding their brakes....this was

> it.......

>

> I pulled the shift out of drive, tried 3rd...nothing, 2nd,

> nothing,...out of gear....the one place you don't want to be on a

> grade...

>

> I put everything I had into that brake while at the same time

easing

> the emergency brake down while trying to make sure it didn't

> catch...riding off the road, hoping for the gravel to do some

> slowing.....and at that moment....at that crest...I got it to the

> side at a " pull off " and slammed that thing into gear.

>

> How we stopped without going through the windshield, or worse, I'm

> not sure....the motor still racing madly...I look around at

everyone,

> shaken, wide eyed.....SAFE.

>

> The engine wouldn't turn off so I got out and popped the hood...it

> was dark...not a light, I couldn't see my hands it was that

dark....I

> felt around, feeling for the carburator, pulling back on the choke,

> easily, effortlessly...it calmed down, till I let it go, grabbing

it

> again, I discovered the spring and a hooking link had vanished...it

> was gone...nothing to hold it back.

>

> I felt my pockets, nothing, thinking, finally reaching down in

front

> of the car, the headlights no help...the grounds dark...I feel

around

> for something, anything. Finally, a piece of old wire. Fumbling

> around I fashioned what I needed and connected it in place. It

worked.

>

> I had to stand there, in front of the car for what seemed like

> several minutes as the events of the past five or ten minutes

rushed

> into my being and tears exploded across my face, bursting out from

> someplace so deep I can't describe it.

>

> For the first time since before I had left on this trip, I felt

> something...and I felt it at it's ultimate force. That place that

> there's no holding back any longer.

>

> Like a movie in fast forward I saw it all over again...and it fell

on

> me like a ton of bricks. Had I not been in this car at this

time...I

> came face to face with, not my mortality...I could of cared

> less....but that of four people who sat just inside of this car.

>

> Did everything for the past few weeks, past few months, past few

> years happen only to make sure I was here at this one moment....the

> only one that really mattered at all? Had it been her driving...

>

> I climbed back into the car and made sure everyone was ok and as I

> put it in gear to continue our trip, she reached over and put her

> hand on my arm....and said, " I know who you are....I knew when I

> picked you up...I know it now, and when you get back home, please

> tell God Thank You " . Thank you.

>

> I didn't really know what to say then, as I drove the rest of the

way

> quietly...not realizing it but taking the freeway one way and then

> the other, till I was out on Hollywood Blvd, driving down the whole

> strip till I got a feeling a certain place would do.

>

> I got out and wished them a safe trip. I hugged them all and double

> checked the linkage. They drove off to their new lives and

hopefully

> better circumstances. And as I turned and was about to decide what

to

> do then to see if my brother was even still here, in this big

> city...there he was, one building over, four stories up, waving to

me.

>

> DC c2007

> knightsintent

>