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Way OT --- to make you laugh ---- When Grandma Goes To Court

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When Grandma Goes To Court

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't

prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first

witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and

asked, 'Mrs. , do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know

you, Mr. . I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've

been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you

manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you'r e

a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to

anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what el se to do, he pointed across

the room and asked, 'Mrs. , do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a

youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't

build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of

the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with

three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet

voice, said,

'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to

the electric chair.'

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