Re: All please read- Mandi Piper

[Guest guest]

Hi Ron,

I didnt know Mandi, but was so moved by your email that I just wanted to say how

very sorry and sad I am for your terrible loss.

I will keep you in my prayers and hope that you can find the understanding you

so need and that the love of your beautiful little girl will help you throught

this awful time.

Much love

Ruth (UK)

---- Original Message -----

From: Mandi P

To: Stillsdisease

Sent: Wednesday, June 25, 2008 3:15 PM

Subject: All please read- Mandi Piper

My name is Ron Piper, I am Mandi's husband of the past 5 years. We

have been a couple for 11 years. Unfortunately I have to inform

everyone that Mandi died Thurs June 19. She committed suicide. She

left no note, no final words, and never gave me an indication that

she felt so bad. We have a 2 year old daughter that she absolutely

loved and adored, I thought she would do anything for her. We are

now left in utter chaos.

Two days before Mandi died, she asked me to take a leave of absence

from work because she was feeling overwhelmed taking care of the baby

and other tasks around the house. I did so, I have done this before

on several occasions without complaint. I loved my wife and let her

know early on that I would drop everything and anything to be here

should she need help. I had an understanding employer also.

Mandi found a way to get both the baby and I out of the house for a

couple hours. She went into a room of the house that we rarely use,

it had a door that closed so that the baby would not see her when we

came home and she shot herself in the head.

She never gave me any indication that she was thinking suicidal

thoughts. I have always been a big protector of Mandi and would have

done so then also. I am at such a loss because Mandi was always

happy, always smiling, and everyone belived the same.

You can see for yourself by going to the web page

www.dropshots.com/mlh951. We use that site for photos so that out of

town relatives could keep up with the baby as she got older. I am in

such a massive state of confusion because she kept these feeling

bottled up so well. I never will be able to understand the torment

those thoughts had to be giving her.

PLEASE!!!! If any of you have any of these thoughts, please speak up

to someone or check your self into a hospital.

Also, I am not very computer literate. I am trying to find something

on the internet that Mandi might have typed to others with Still's

disease that might give me any indication of what went wrong. IS

there a way on this site to view only the discussions that Mandi

chimed in on or started and avoid going over the hunderds of pages of

listed discussions?

Also, please help me if you can- if there is anything you can let me

know about discussions that you have had with Mandi, please inform me

of the link I think it is called, good or bad, I need to know. I

will hold no grudges on negative posts (if there are any), I just

need to know.

Please take care of your self, your family and most of all, don't be

afraid to speak up. I will be checking in as much as possible. If

you don't care to post on the message board for everyone to see, I

can also be reached at a o l under the email name mickstr68-

[Guest guest]

Ron, I'm very sorry to hear of this. I went ahead and researched a little

bit, and you would have to join the " Yahoo " group called " StillsDisease " to

research her messages. I hope this is of some help to you.

Simply type in www.yahoo.com , create a free account, find the " groups "

icon and type in " Stills or Stills Disease " , either should take you to where

you want to go. I think the group is moderated, but being as Stills has

directly impacted your life (even though you don't have it) I can't see

there being a problem with your joining, but I am not a moderator.

I'll say a few prayers for Mandi, yourself & your daughter.

Kirk.

>

>

>

--

Everything in life sucks except things that should!

[Guest guest]

 Im am sitting here with many tears. Stills must bring on great feelings of

depression and feelings of ending it with the pain and medications. I have upped

my Prozac medication to double and seem to be doing better.

 My husband actually almost checked me into a hospital 3 weeks ago I was so bad

with these same thoughts. Im crying so hard because I know how Mandi must have

felt. I have let others know here in my home I have not hidden it.

We are with you in our prayers Ron and with your baby. You sound like a

wonderful man and I am so sorry for your loss. All family members need to know

that this disease is hard on the body and mind. I could not take Mtx it made me

so sad and unreal thoughts of doom that I told the DR right away and thats why I

cant take it to this day.

If there is anything I can do please email me Ron. My prayers and love go to

you. Be strong and hold on to her love and memory in your heart.

  Ann Fultz

[Guest guest]

I just can't believe that another person has taken their life

because of this disease. I've never had a such a hard time dealing

with this. But I've nothing before this, so it's easier for me. I

could never imagine what it's like to want a permanent escape. My deepest

condolences Ron. I'll be thinking of you and your little girl.

: )

Nobody said it was easy

Oh its such a shame for us to part

Nobody said it was easy

No one ever said that it would be this hard

Oh take me back to the start - 'The Scientist' Coldplay

[Guest guest]

Ron,

Please accept my sincerest condolences regarding Mandi. I spoke with

her on email privately and I know she was searching for answers but as

you said, she was very upbeat and positive. I am holding both you and

your daughter in my prayers.

With Deepest Sympathies,

angela

Houston, TX

[Guest guest]

I am so sorry Ron to hear of your loss, I will do all that I can to

advocate and help reach out to others with Stills and on medication

for homones and behaviors so that others don't have to go through or

feel yours or Mandi's pain. If anyone ever needs to be uplifted or

just needs to vent please email me at nicole321a@... I will

listen and pray for all.

Again Ron I am so sorry for your lost.

A.

>

> My name is Ron Piper, I am Mandi's husband of the past 5 years.

We

> have been a couple for 11 years. Unfortunately I have to inform

> everyone that Mandi died Thurs June 19. She committed suicide.

She

> left no note, no final words, and never gave me an indication that

> she felt so bad. We have a 2 year old daughter that she

absolutely

> loved and adored, I thought she would do anything for her. We are

> now left in utter chaos.

>

> Two days before Mandi died, she asked me to take a leave of

absence

> from work because she was feeling overwhelmed taking care of the

baby

> and other tasks around the house. I did so, I have done this

before

> on several occasions without complaint. I loved my wife and let

her

> know early on that I would drop everything and anything to be here

> should she need help. I had an understanding employer also.

>

> Mandi found a way to get both the baby and I out of the house for

a

> couple hours. She went into a room of the house that we rarely

use,

> it had a door that closed so that the baby would not see her when

we

> came home and she shot herself in the head.

>

> She never gave me any indication that she was thinking suicidal

> thoughts. I have always been a big protector of Mandi and would

have

> done so then also. I am at such a loss because Mandi was always

> happy, always smiling, and everyone belived the same.

>

> You can see for yourself by going to the web page

> www.dropshots.com/mlh951. We use that site for photos so that out

of

> town relatives could keep up with the baby as she got older. I am

in

> such a massive state of confusion because she kept these feeling

> bottled up so well. I never will be able to understand the

torment

> those thoughts had to be giving her.

>

> PLEASE!!!! If any of you have any of these thoughts, please speak

up

> to someone or check your self into a hospital.

>

> Also, I am not very computer literate. I am trying to find

something

> on the internet that Mandi might have typed to others with Still's

> disease that might give me any indication of what went wrong. IS

> there a way on this site to view only the discussions that Mandi

> chimed in on or started and avoid going over the hunderds of pages

of

> listed discussions?

>

> Also, please help me if you can- if there is anything you can let

me

> know about discussions that you have had with Mandi, please inform

me

> of the link I think it is called, good or bad, I need to know. I

> will hold no grudges on negative posts (if there are any), I just

> need to know.

>

> Please take care of your self, your family and most of all, don't

be

> afraid to speak up. I will be checking in as much as possible.

If

> you don't care to post on the message board for everyone to see, I

> can also be reached at a o l under the email name mickstr68-

>

[Guest guest]

Ron,

     Your letter made me so sad, cause I can not even imagine the pain, hurt and

confusion you are going through. I lost a boyfriend to suicide a few years ago

it was very hard to deal with. I am so so sorry, my prayers are with you and

your family. I wish I could take away all the pain, or say something to make

things better, but I know I can't. So I am here and my prayers are too.

 

Mandy (from Wyo)

[Guest guest]

Ron, I'm so sorry. I can't begin to imagine how you're feeling. Mandi was such

an intelligent, caring person. She really seemed to be diligently looking for

answers to this disease. There are so many days when we feel so hopeless...and

a few where we feel hopeful. A lot of the drugs we take have warnings for

depression. Please don't blame yourself ever. I have been to that dreaded

place where I put a gun to my head....but at the last minute I reached out to my

Mother who made me realize it was a temporary feeling and that help was

possible. Medication did pull me out of that depression (it was many years

ago)...but for all of us on that track, do as Ron says...get help....reach out.

Someone will be here for you until you can get professional help. Just hold on.

I don't know what else to say through my tears Ron. I just so sorry.

in TX

----- Original Message -----

[Guest guest]

Dear Ron

I am just catching up on my e-mails and have therefore only read of the

death of your wife on the 19th I didn't know Mandi at all but I am sorry

for the sad news unfortunately I understand and you often read in the papers

that no one seems to be able to tell when life has got too much for them to

bear. I can't begin to imagine what you are going through at the moment but

I will be thinking of you and your lovely daughter and hope that this family

can help you.

Take care of yourself

Best wishes

Joan U.K.

[Guest guest]

Hi Ron, my deepest sympathies on your loss. I hope you find the answers

you are looking for. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your

daughter at this devastating time in your lives. Libby.

>

> My name is Ron Piper, I am Mandi's husband of the past 5 years. We

> have been a couple for 11 years. Unfortunately I have to inform

> everyone that Mandi died Thurs June 19. She committed suicide.