Guest guest Posted August 1, 2002 Report Share Posted August 1, 2002 I think these are absolutely hilarious, Carol! Thanks for the laughs. [ ] Dr's office jokes > I just thought these were really funny! > > Love and hugs, > Carol > -------------------------------------------------------------- > Things That Happen In a Doctor's Office > > A man comes into the ER and yells, " My wife's going to have her baby in the > cab! " I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, > and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were > several cabs, and I was in the wrong one. Dr. Mark Mac, San , > TX > > At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and > slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. " Big breaths, " I > instructed. " Yes, they used to be, " remorsed the patient. Dr. > Byrnes, Seattle, WA > > One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her > husband had died of a massive myocardial infarction. Not more than five > minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had > died of a " massive internal fart. " Dr. Steinberg, Manitoba, Canada > > I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I > placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, " Cover your right > eye with your hand. " He read the 20/20 line perfectly. " Now your left. " > Again, a flawless read. " Now both, " I requested. There was silence. He > couldn't even read the large E on the top line. I turned and discovered that > he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his > eyes covered. I was laughing too hard to finish the exam. Dr. > Theodropolous, Worcester, MA > > During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he > informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his > medications. " Which one? " I asked. " The patch. The nurse told me to put on a > new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it! " I had > him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see... Yes, the > man had over fifty patches on his body! Now the instructions include removal > of the old patch before applying a new one. Dr. St. Clair, Norfolk, > VA > > While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, " How long have > you been bedridden? " After a look of complete confusion she answered... > " Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive. " Dr. > Swanson, Corvallis, OR > > I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, " So how was your breakfast > this morning? " " It was very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't > seem to get used to the taste, " the patient replied. I then asked to see the > jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled " KY Jelly. " Dr. Leonard > Kransdorf, Detroit, MI > > A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple > hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and > wearing strange clothing, entered. It was quickly determined that the > patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. > When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed > that her pubic hair had been dyed green, and above it there was a tattoo > that read, " Keep off the grass. " Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon > wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said " Sorry, had to mow > the lawn. " > > Have a great day and keep out of the Doctors Office... > ------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > Check out all the jokes at: > http://www.arthritisinsight.com/fun/jokes > > --------------------------------------------------------------------------- > (Jokes courtesy of Arthritis Insight) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 1, 2002 Report Share Posted August 1, 2002 > I just thought these were really funny! > > Love and hugs, > Carol > -------------------------------------------------------------- > >Carol, those were great, good way to start out my morning. in WA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 1, 2002 Report Share Posted August 1, 2002 Carol, thanks for the laughter. I needed it. Iris __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 1, 2002 Report Share Posted August 1, 2002 Thanks, Carol. Those were so cute! Love... Tess Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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