I'm Still Here

[Guest guest]

Hi All,

I'm still here. On top of all the physical stress and health problems, we

are now dealing with Ron's parents entering the retirement home tomorrow just

outside of Chicago. This is being done at his brother's insistence and the

Dad is very unhappy. In fact, they gave him Xanax to help with the stress

and when he got out of bed, he fell and cracked one of his ribs. This man is

88 years old. He is crying to Ron on the phone that when he signs the papers

tomorrow, that is the end, he has no more options and it is all final. They

have lived in their house for over 50 years and now they are being forced

into this assisted living home. Right now, they have a hospice nurse coming

in and assisting with the Mother who has had breast cancer for 23 years and

the doctor only gives her another 3 years to live. She is 87. The Mother is

excited to go as she will have a whole new set of servants waiting on her.

The Dad is very worried about the expenses (this place is $100.00 per day per

person + anything else that they might want). They can receive nursing care

at $37.00 per day per person and if they want their medications distributed

by a nurse, then that is $8.00 per day per person (I could take that job and

use the extra spending money). When the Mother doesn't want to bath herself

(everyday) that will be extra. When she won't go to the dining room for

meals (which she never gets out of bed), that is also an extra charge. The

brother is upset that the Dad is having a phone hooked up in their room so

that they can at least talk to Ron. This is a terrible mess and I feel bad

and they aren't even my parents and they don't even like me! We offered to

bring them down to Florida, but the Mother won't leave the brother. The

brother told Dad that he should just try it for 3 months and then if he

doesn't like it, he can move back into his house, however, during those 3

months, the brother hopes to have sold the house. Nice guy, huh? This is

also the same guy who wished me dead, so I guess this should not surprise me.

Sometimes, I wish I could sign up for Survivor, but not be found! Well, it

does keep my mind off my own problems and gives me something else to think

about besides myself. Tonight the Dad told the brother, that he was doing

this just for him. How sad! It keeping me awake tonight among other

problems.

I hope this finds all of you having a nice weekend, hopefully with less pain.

Thank God all of the miners were found alive!!!!What a wonderful ending!

Hopefully tomorrow will shine bright for so many people.

Gentle, tender, angel hugs to all,

Debs in FL

[Guest guest]

sorry to hear about ron's parents. hope everything works out for them and

they make friends. that always helps. i'll bet all those papers to sign are

confusing and scary. kathy in il

[Guest guest]

Hi Debs,

I went through a similar situation with a friend a couple of years ago. Her

father suffered a stroke and had to be hospitalized. My friend and her

sister Harleen have lived with their dad all their lives with him paying for

everything. They are both in their late 50s. Harleen insisted that dad go

to a nursing home and that she could not take care of him.

half-heartedly agreed. (I called their dad Uncle Harley or unc) The only

thing unc wanted was to come home and be around his family. I took Wyatt to

see him many times at the home and we spoke often. His condition worsened

and the only thing he wanted was to come home and be with his family. He

knew it was near the end. I spoke and argued with and Harleen many

times telling them that there are agencies that could help them take care of

him at home, but Harleen insisted it was not possible. I finally convinced

that we could do it and we were on the way to the home to tell him. We

got to the home and we were told that we just missed him. He died 5 minutes

before we got there. In my opinion, from the talks that I had with him, he

willed himself to die. He did not want to be a burden to his children and

that was what they made him feel like. I still feel the immense pain of his

loss and Wyatt still talks fondly about unc Harley. There are some people

out there who have been given so much that they don't appreciate the giver

and don't try to return some of the kindness given. I have lost a lot of

respect for and Harleen over this and we have settled on aggreeing to

disagree. So I do know how you could lose sleep over this situation and just

wanted you to know that you are not alone.

Love and Hugs

Stacey in PA

[Guest guest]

Dear Stacey...God bless you for trying to help this dear gentleman. We

need more people like you, Stacey.

Love & Hugs...

Tess

[Guest guest]

Did someone say asparagas? I got a steamer and also know how to make a wonderful homade Hollandaise Sauce...or cheese if you prefer....Oh boy...mmmmm licking my chops.

I had a nice stand of Asparagas and they sprayed a vegetation killer along the fenceline. So ended my Asparagas.... Sure you can buy the stuff from the store its not the same.....

You post made me literally hum the tune Rockin Robin. I love springtime and the birdies. I got my feeder hanging and water in the bird bath. Great to hear from you again.

>From: "Dennis"

>Reply- >

>Subject: [ ] I'm Still Here >Date: Fri, 2 May 2003 18:29:14 -0400 > >Hi Jan, Dave, and everyone, > >Sorry I've been absent - no excuse. I have over 1,000 unread posts from this list serv. I just get tired after work and after doing the chores and supper I conk out. >Anyway - I'm doing well. Spring is finally here and I'm trying to take the time to appreciate it. The birds are coming back - today I saw an Oriole and heard an Ovenbird and a couple of Towhees. I also have a Louisiana Waterthrush (I think) here at home. I just put up 7 Bluebird nest boxes at a 60 acre field at school. Had to dig a hole & set a post for each one. I built the boxes - the carpenter shop at work was too busy. >I'd like to say hello to all the new members who don't know me. I've done all the shots & med x2 and now just use Stevia and milk thistle. Judy and I hike when we can and I get along pretty good. I'll be 59 on May 25th, have 2 dogs and 2 hens. (Judy has 3 cats; the rabbit died last year). > >Be well everyone, >Dennis from NH > >P.S. Picking asparagus tonight. Protect your PC - Click here for McAfee.com VirusScan Online