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ER VISITS

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A friend sent this to me and I thought it was funny. Hope it doesn't offend

anyone.

Love and Hugs

Stacey in PA

Subject: FW: TRUE EMERGENCY ROOM VISITS!

>

> The last one is funny as hell!!!

>

> TRUE EMERGENCY ROOM VISITS!

>

>

>

> INNER SKELETON----- A 63 year old widow was admitted to the hospital in

>

> Recife, Brazil, suffering abdominal pains. X-rays showed that she was

> carrying a 20 inch long skeleton of a fetus which she conceived a decade

> earlier. It had become lodged outside the womb and was never expelled

> from her body.

>

>

>

> FEMALE SOFA----- A 500lb. woman from Illinois was examined in a

> hospital.

>

> During the examination, an asthma inhaler fell from under her armpit, a

> dime was found under one of her breasts and a remote control was found

> lodged

> between the folds of her vulva.

>

>

>

> PRICKLY PAIR-----OUCH! In Michigan, a man came into the ER with

>

> lacerations to his penis. He complained that his wife had " ...a rat in

> her

> privates... " and it bit him during sex. After an examination of his

> wife, it was

> revealed that she had a surgical needle left inside her after a recent

> hysterectomy.

>

>

>

> PING PONG ANYONE?----- A 20 year old man came into the ER with a stony

>

> mass in his rectum. He said that he and his boyfriend were fooling

> around with

> concrete mix, then his boyfriend had the idea of pouring the mix into

> his

> anus using a funnel. The concrete then hardened, causing constipation

> and

> pain. Under general anesthesia, a perfect concrete cast of the man's

> rectum was removed along with a ping pong ball. (Boy we live sheltered

> lives - thank goodness)

>

>

>

> BLIND DRUNK----- A drunk staggered into a Pennsylvania ER complaining of

>

> severe pain while trying to remove his contact lenses. He said that they

> would come out halfway, but they always popped back in.

> A nurse tried to help using a suction pump, but without success.

> Finally, a doctor examined him and discovered the man

> did not have his contact lenses in at all. He had been trying to rip out

> the membrane of his cornea.

>

>

>

> OUCH AND DOUBLE OUCH!----- A couple hobbled into a Washington State

>

> emergency room covered in bloody restaurant towels. The man had his

> hands

> around his abdomen and the woman had hers around her head.

> They eventually explained to doctors that they had gone out that evening

> for a romantic dinner.

> Overcome with passion, the woman crept under the table to administer

> oral

> sex to the man.

> While in the act, she had an epileptic fit, which caused her to clamp

> down

> on the man's penis and wrench it from side to side. In agony and

> desperation, the man grabbed a fork and stabbed her in the head until

> she

> let go.

> And you all thought your day was going bad!!!

>

>

>

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  • 6 years later...
Guest guest

Oh how frightening. I hope you get some answers soon---awful that the ER didn't

do everything the doctor wanted. I really hope you get some answers and that it

is quickly treatable.

e, mom to 'joe' 22 poly/lupus

From: Mathena@... <Mathena@...>

Subject: ER Visits

, " Utah Kids " <utahkids >

Date: Saturday, April 25, 2009, 12:04 AM

Jordon and I have just spent that last 2 nights at the ER. He has been

VERY VERY confused, and we are VERY WORRIED about him,

he went wandering in school, and didn't know where he had been, so they are also

very worried about Jordon like we are.

He has been very confused since.

Yesterday's visit to the ER all they did was take blood and urine labs and

didn't listen to me when I told them that Jordon's pediatrician wanted CT, MRI,

Lumbar puncture, and EEG done. So today we were up to the ER again, with An

actual note this time from the pediatrician. We got the CT and the lumbar

puncture done, but not the MRI or EEG yet. His pediatrician is trying to rule

out something else causing his confusion, other than his Enbrel shots.

I'm very tired atm so not sure I remember the wording but the Enbrel shot has in

a few ppl caused MS. Very rare I'm told. Which these are the signs Jordon is

having.

So we will not be giving him any more Enbrel, in case it is that, causing

Jordon's symptoms. The 2 tests we had tonight were negative so we just need to

do the MRI, and EEG and if those are negative then it is the Enbrel

I will give an update on Jordon after we see his Neurologist and have those 2

tests done.

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