Faith and Loneliness

[Guest guest]

Great post ,you said it all so well. Sometimes you can be alone in a crowd

and loneliness is always difficult to deal with on top of relentless pain. I

personally would rather be alone,then in a bad marriage.

Carol asked if and how our life changed with the onset of the disease. My life

was in the corporate world where I had a career I loved and was driven by

ambition. At the age of 56 my life changed forever. The saddest day was the one

when I left my office for the last time and said goodbye to all the employees

who I had shared more than 30 years with. It took me 3 years to even consider

there could be a life with RA. What a change! My youngest son moved two doors

away and I began to babysit my grandsons who were 5 yrs old and 10 yrs old. They

filled my life with a joy I could never imagine. Here I was doing for them what

I had never had time to do for my own 2 sons. They moved an hour away last year

at the ages of 16 and 22 but we have such a close bond that keeps them either

phoning or visiting 3-4 times a week. My life began to be filled with hockey

games,football,baseball,soccer and PTA meetings. Craig played 2 yrs of elite

baseball which meant travelling all over Canada and the States. We were in our

element since we the took on the job of travelling with him. For these years my

focus was on the boys rather than the RA and I am eternally grateful to be given

this opportunity. My computer room is covered in pictures of all 4 grandsons and

I can look around,see their pictures and smile as I recall the countless

memories we shared. I am a very different person than I once was so RA brought

me blessings that far outweigh the devastation that the disease brought.

All of you,don't ever give up hope of better days to come,they really will.

My foot is still a problem because I can't put a shoe on but two of my patient

partners and I are going to a cottage for the week,some of it will be spent in

studying a new type of MSK screening intended for GPs starting in September.. I

will go no mail tonight some time and will miss you all. Will be in touch as

soon as I get back.

Hugs

June