Re: The holidays are upon us...

[Guest guest]

Sondra, I understand the need for letting Kim be who she is & to allow her

to watch what she wants & we did allow her to watch Barney, Wee Sing & other

toddler videos for a long time. What happened was, she perseverated on them

& couldn't/wouldn't watch anything else until we removed them. Then she

moved on to watching Kate & & not to High School musicals,

Hannah Montana & Disney movies. She fixates on Sing Alongs also. It seems

that it's also anxiety about watching shows/movies she hasn't seen before

but once she sees it being played & is not so new, she can get to the point

of watching the more age appropriate ones. So....when is it allowing her to

still watch toddler videos OK, when if allowed to do that, she'll watch

nothing else & the bigger the gap of having anything in common with other

kids? Since we removed all the toddler types, she is now fixated on

everything Hannah Montana & also wants to buy Sharpay's belted floral jacket

that she wears during the cafeteria song, so, she does fixate, now it's

something more age appropriate, at least.

I don't want to take away what she likes, but she has started liking the new

things that we exposed her to, under duress, initially. but has now changed

what she likes. She does still talk about Wee Sing, but I'm afraid to let

her watch those kiddie things again b/c that will narrow what she has in

common with other kids to enjoy together, so what to do?

She does get her choice in other things, like what she likes to wear,

clothing & hair style. She does get choices & get to do activities she

wants to.

Marie

> cheryl you have a very well balanced view with her and that is of what

> i to admire of you as a mom person for her and you daughter sounds much

> like of me. I to be fo able to watch some documentary sorts of shows

> but prefer of kids based shows much disney sorts of movies and really

> am of anxious to see of the new madagasgar movie. It is of a part of me

> and is of just reflective of who I to be in this life and so now I to

> just accept this is okay and that is shouldnot make me feel bad in this

> life for it. I to not have of the problem it is of that others feel

> uncomfortable and or unsure when they see of adults not acting like

> adults and so that is of thier issues not of mine.

>

> I to also cannot dress like grown up womans or such as cant find

> anythings that brings me texture comfort with those sorts of clothings.

> I to need of my soft sorts of clothing and so wear of sweats and such

> and or jeans and often a mens cotton T shirt sort of clothings because

> can tolerate of the texture of them not because i to have of gender

> issues. some to assume it ot be of a gender issues.

> sondra

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

> Autism_in_Girls-subscribe

> ------------------------

> Autism_in_Girls-unsubscribe@...! Groups Links

>

>

>

>

--

Marie A.

[Guest guest]

Oh dear, I've been there on that one. If there was a single hole

showing ANY stuffing, it got picked. I think with us she pretty much

destroyed everything with holes to the point we had to get new, and

then there were no more holes to pick from.

If only everyone in the world knew the things we deal with!!!

Debi

--- In Autism_in_Girls , " scarletwind63 "

> >Thank you for advice the velcro. I never thought of that . Could you

> lease give me any advice about how to keep her from destroying her

> matresses and other furniture by taking the stuffing out of them? Do

> you have any ideas why she may be doing this?

>

[Guest guest]

where are their outlet stores? I didn't know Hanna had outlet

stores!!!

Rose Christian wrote: We really like Hanna Andersson

clothes. They are really soft and well made, and actually have elastic waist

pants without buttons or zippers. Unfortunately they're pricy. Fortunately we

live near one of their outlets!

Rose

>

> > cheryl you have a very well balanced view with her and that is of what

> > i to admire of you as a mom person for her and you daughter sounds much

> > like of me. I to be fo able to watch some documentary sorts of shows

> > but prefer of kids based shows much disney sorts of movies and really

> > am of anxious to see of the new madagasgar movie. It is of a part of me

> > and is of just reflective of who I to be in this life and so now I to

> > just accept this is okay and that is shouldnot make me feel bad in this

> > life for it. I to not have of the problem it is of that others feel

> > uncomfortable and or unsure when they see of adults not acting like

> > adults and so that is of thier issues not of mine.

> >

> > I to also cannot dress like grown up womans or such as cant find

> > anythings that brings me texture comfort with those sorts of clothings.

> > I to need of my soft sorts of clothing and so wear of sweats and such

> > and or jeans and often a mens cotton T shirt sort of clothings because

> > can tolerate of the texture of them not because i to have of gender

> > issues. some to assume it ot be of a gender issues.

> > sondra

> >

> >

> >

>

> --

> Dare to dream, dare to fly, dare to be the ever chosen one to touch the

> sky.

>

> keeping family healthy the natural way

> with young living essential oils and natural supplements! !

>

> http://health. groups.yahoo. com/group/ lilpixierose

> a great new group for EOs.

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

> you may need to buy of the things that zips over the mattress and

> then buy of a mattress cover so she cannnot reach the mattress

> easily. you can then buy of a fitted sheet that fits the mattress and

> then buy of one that is of a size larger than her bed to tuck in this

> will provide many layers of things to help keep of her from getting

> to it before you catch of her doing of it.

>

> a firm " NO " place a visual poster near her bed saying the rule " my

> bed is for sleeping in " .

>

> * here are some samples of rules to put, make sure to keep them to 3

> or less of things you feel are infractions to her bed.....

>

> no jumping

> no picking

> no tearing

>

> so when ever you see of her doing these things make sure you use the

> firm NO as she will learn over time this word and tone will give her

> a consequence/ but then show her the rules to her bed/

>

> when you see her doing the rules such as if you see of her just

> laying there praise her by saying " I like how you are of laying in

> you bed nicely " or some things that is of showing you like what she

> is of doing but do not point out the fact she is not picking or

> tearing as those words to her might trigger her to actually do the

> action she just heared out of impulse because it might get stuck

> inside of her echoing back you words to her at that moment. and that

> echoing in her might lead to the action of picking and tearing.

>

> if she had a good day of being nice to her bed and if she understands

> the token things of rewards and can wait for them at the end of the

> day allow her to earn a reward, but if she is of not there yet

> developmentally then not do the token sorts of things yet/ as the

> waiting might not be of associated to her good choices and might be

> of seen by her as a fragmented things with no connection at the end

> of her day.

> sondra

>Thank you so much.I will give your suggestions a try and let you know

the outcome. is 13yrs.old but has many behaviors on a toddler

to preschool level.

[Guest guest]

>

> Oh dear, I've been there on that one. If there was a single hole

> showing ANY stuffing, it got picked. I think with us she pretty much

> destroyed everything with holes to the point we had to get new, and

> then there were no more holes to pick from.

>

> If only everyone in the world knew the things we deal with!!!

>

> Debi

>

>

> --- In Autism_in_Girls , " scarletwind63 "

> > >Thank you for advice the velcro. I never thought of that . Could you

> > lease give me any advice about how to keep her from destroying her

> > matresses and other furniture by taking the stuffing out of them? Do

> > you have any ideas why she may be doing this?

> >

>Debi, Seems as if there are no holes she will find a way to make

them. Lol ( have to lol or will lose my mind.) She has taken a brand

new matress and managed to rip holes in it before.

[Guest guest]

>

> Oh dear, I've been there on that one. If there was a single hole

> showing ANY stuffing, it got picked. I think with us she pretty much

> destroyed everything with holes to the point we had to get new, and

> then there were no more holes to pick from.

>

> If only everyone in the world knew the things we deal with!!!

>

> Debi

>

>

> --- In Autism_in_Girls , " scarletwind63 "

> > >Thank you for advice the velcro. I never thought of that . Could you

> > lease give me any advice about how to keep her from destroying her

> > matresses and other furniture by taking the stuffing out of them? Do

> > you have any ideas why she may be doing this?

> >

>Debi, Seems as if there are no holes she will find a way to make

them. Lol ( have to lol or will lose my mind.) She has taken a brand

new matress and managed to rip holes in it before.

[Guest guest]

We have found with our Amy to buy the cheaper foam mattresses. Then we fit a

single bed quilt cover over it and then a twin bed one over that was well. It

gives her to much to try and get thru luckily her attention span runs out before

she gets to the mattress.

 

Subject: Re: The holidays are upon us...

To: Autism_in_Girls

Received: Wednesday, 26 November, 2008, 4:45 AM

Oh dear, I've been there on that one. If there was a single hole

showing ANY stuffing, it got picked. I think with us she pretty much

destroyed everything with holes to the point we had to get new, and

then there were no more holes to pick from.

If only everyone in the world knew the things we deal with!!!

Debi

--- In Autism_in_Girls@ yahoogroups. com, " scarletwind63 "

> >Thank you for advice the velcro. I never thought of that . Could you

> lease give me any advice about how to keep her from destroying her

> matresses and other furniture by taking the stuffing out of them? Do

> you have any ideas why she may be doing this?

>

Start your day with Yahoo!7 and win a Sony Bravia TV. Enter now

http://au.docs.yahoo.com/homepageset/?p1=other & p2=au & p3=tagline

[Guest guest]

You can't beat that, can you.

Karmen

Re: The holidays are upon us...

I think they have some newer gaming systems, don't know if they are

more advanced or not. I also forgot to mention I accidently slammed

the stylet in the van door, crushing it. I called the Leap Frog

company and asked how much a replacement would cost. They said $5 but

not to worry & in 3 days I had a new one on my door at no cost. They

seem to be a very cool company.

Debi

>

> Hi Debi,

>

> My daughter Peri likes her Leapster, too. She has about 7

cartridges for it and it is truly durable. It was so easy for her to

learn. I bought it for her for her 6th birthday (this year) and I

started her out with pre-school games. When she mastered those, I

went to the next grade up and so forth. I am hoping to get her

something more complex, like the next step up handheld electronic

game, but I haven't figured out which one would best suit her.

>

> Karmen

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Becky,

From Hanna's website:

Michigan City, IN

Kittery, ME

Albertville, MN

Lake Oswego, OR

burg, VA

Woodinville, WA (near us, Thank goodness!!)

>

> > cheryl you have a very well balanced view with her and that is of what

> > i to admire of you as a mom person for her and you daughter sounds much

> > like of me. I to be fo able to watch some documentary sorts of shows

> > but prefer of kids based shows much disney sorts of movies and really

> > am of anxious to see of the new madagasgar movie. It is of a part of me

> > and is of just reflective of who I to be in this life and so now I to

> > just accept this is okay and that is shouldnot make me feel bad in this

> > life for it. I to not have of the problem it is of that others feel

> > uncomfortable and or unsure when they see of adults not acting like

> > adults and so that is of thier issues not of mine.

> >

> > I to also cannot dress like grown up womans or such as cant find

> > anythings that brings me texture comfort with those sorts of clothings.

> > I to need of my soft sorts of clothing and so wear of sweats and such

> > and or jeans and often a mens cotton T shirt sort of clothings because

> > can tolerate of the texture of them not because i to have of gender

> > issues. some to assume it ot be of a gender issues.

> > sondra

> >

> >

> >

>

> --

> Dare to dream, dare to fly, dare to be the ever chosen one to touch the

> sky.

>

> keeping family healthy the natural way

> with young living essential oils and natural supplements! !

>

> http://health. groups.yahoo. com/group/ lilpixierose

> a great new group for EOs.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Marie i to be of sorry if miscommunicated of my words . as I to often

share this but maybe was of not clear it is of all about balance. I

to like of my toy things but understand cant carry them every where

and be suh but I to be of use them as transitional things and if it

is of not acceptable for some settings will not take of them out such

as out to eat with family they stay in my back pack, but if in a long

autism related meeting it is of a safe to be ot to get them out if

need to, to help me stay attending and to regulate of self.

if you daughter likes of those things that is of fine but if she was

being of allowed and liked of them to the point of not being of

balanced so that there was of no time to learn new, explore new, and

gain of developmental skills then that is of not healthy.

cheryl shares her daughter needs these items for church and other

places and to me her daughter no only likes them but uses them as a

navigational tool to help her regulate, wait and or sit for a time

such things as this. She is of reflecting that balance and that is of

what was of commenting on in regards to her daughter was the balance

parts of it all.

sondra

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the info....sorry to say there aren't any near me.

Becky in GA

Rose Christian wrote:

Dear Becky,

From Hanna's website:

Michigan City, IN

Kittery, ME

Albertville, MN

Lake Oswego, OR

burg, VA

Woodinville, WA (near us, Thank goodness!!)

>

> > cheryl you have a very well balanced view with her and that is of what

> > i to admire of you as a mom person for her and you daughter sounds much

> > like of me. I to be fo able to watch some documentary sorts of shows

> > but prefer of kids based shows much disney sorts of movies and really

> > am of anxious to see of the new madagasgar movie. It is of a part of me

> > and is of just reflective of who I to be in this life and so now I to

> > just accept this is okay and that is shouldnot make me feel bad in this

> > life for it. I to not have of the problem it is of that others feel

> > uncomfortable and or unsure when they see of adults not acting like

> > adults and so that is of thier issues not of mine.

> >

> > I to also cannot dress like grown up womans or such as cant find

> > anythings that brings me texture comfort with those sorts of clothings.

> > I to need of my soft sorts of clothing and so wear of sweats and such

> > and or jeans and often a mens cotton T shirt sort of clothings because

> > can tolerate of the texture of them not because i to have of gender

> > issues. some to assume it ot be of a gender issues.

> > sondra

> >

> >

> >

>

> --

> Dare to dream, dare to fly, dare to be the ever chosen one to touch the

> sky.

>

> keeping family healthy the natural way

> with young living essential oils and natural supplements! !

>

> http://health. groups.yahoo. com/group/ lilpixierose

> a great new group for EOs.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Dear Becky,

Sometimes the website for Hanna has some good deals/sales.

Rose

>

> > cheryl you have a very well balanced view with her and that is of what

> > i to admire of you as a mom person for her and you daughter sounds much

> > like of me. I to be fo able to watch some documentary sorts of shows

> > but prefer of kids based shows much disney sorts of movies and really

> > am of anxious to see of the new madagasgar movie. It is of a part of me

> > and is of just reflective of who I to be in this life and so now I to

> > just accept this is okay and that is shouldnot make me feel bad in this

> > life for it. I to not have of the problem it is of that others feel

> > uncomfortable and or unsure when they see of adults not acting like

> > adults and so that is of thier issues not of mine.

> >

> > I to also cannot dress like grown up womans or such as cant find

> > anythings that brings me texture comfort with those sorts of clothings.

> > I to need of my soft sorts of clothing and so wear of sweats and such

> > and or jeans and often a mens cotton T shirt sort of clothings because

> > can tolerate of the texture of them not because i to have of gender

> > issues. some to assume it ot be of a gender issues.

> > sondra

> >

> >

> >

>

> --

> Dare to dream, dare to fly, dare to be the ever chosen one to touch the

> sky.

>

> keeping family healthy the natural way

> with young living essential oils and natural supplements! !

>

> http://health. groups.yahoo. com/group/ lilpixierose

> a great new group for EOs.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Also my 16 year old loves her doll that she sleeps with. The attachment

started about a year ago, she never had this when she was younger. She sleeps

cuddled next to this old tattered doll she got when she was about six, and she

changes her name frequently. The most creative name the doll has had was, "

'Cause the Lord don't sell no gasoline on trash purillant. " I kid you not! And

she recently expressed a desire to have a new doll, not to replace the other

one but to join her, and so my mother got her one. Both dolls have pigtails,

which was important. She calls that " tickly hair " . And the new doll's name?

Squishy Oyster. These dolls stay in her bed, and they must be covered up during

the day, but we must do it, she will not hear of doing it herself. A few

times a day she goes to her bedroom and feels around under the covers to make

sure the dolls are there. She will often say, " I thought the bed was blank, but

dolly! " . And at night she draws the covers back ( we cannot do it!) and

exclaims in surprise and delight, " Dolly! " . She gets such joy from seeing the

doll

( now the two dolls) in her bed, and seems surprised each time. When I tried

to get her to learn to make her own bed, she refused, and I think it is

because she feels that if she covers the dolls then she won't be surprised at

night to find them in her bed. There are other layers to this but I lack time.

She doesn't bring the dolls anywhere unless we go away overnight, or if she

goes to her Grandma's overnight. She knows she can't bring them to school. I

love this whole fascination and attachment. She didn't have anything like this

when she was younger and it warms my heart to see her with her comfort dolls.

Melinda

**************Life should be easier. So should your homepage. Try the NEW

AOL.com.

(http://www.aol.com/?optin=new-dp & icid=aolcom40vanity & ncid=emlcntaolcom00000002)

[Guest guest]

Very interesting. Sounds like she prefers the routine as many ASD children do.

Do you have other children? Can anyone else cover the dolls up or is that a

'parents' job in her eyes?

Karmen

Re: The holidays are upon us...

Also my 16 year old loves her doll that she sleeps with. The attachment

started about a year ago, she never had this when she was younger. She sleeps

cuddled next to this old tattered doll she got when she was about six, and she

changes her name frequently. The most creative name the doll has had was, "

'Cause the Lord don't sell no gasoline on trash purillant. " I kid you not! And

she recently expressed a desire to have a new doll, not to replace the other

one but to join her, and so my mother got her one. Both dolls have pigtails,

which was important. She calls that " tickly hair " . And the new doll's name?

Squishy Oyster. These dolls stay in her bed, and they must be covered up

during

the day, but we must do it, she will not hear of doing it herself. A few

times a day she goes to her bedroom and feels around under the covers to make

sure the dolls are there. She will often say, " I thought the bed was blank,

but

dolly! " . And at night she draws the covers back ( we cannot do it!) and

exclaims in surprise and delight, " Dolly! " . She gets such joy from seeing the

doll

( now the two dolls) in her bed, and seems surprised each time. When I tried

to get her to learn to make her own bed, she refused, and I think it is

because she feels that if she covers the dolls then she won't be surprised at

night to find them in her bed. There are other layers to this but I lack time.

She doesn't bring the dolls anywhere unless we go away overnight, or if she

goes to her Grandma's overnight. She knows she can't bring them to school. I

love this whole fascination and attachment. She didn't have anything like this

when she was younger and it warms my heart to see her with her comfort dolls.

Melinda

**************Life should be easier. So should your homepage. Try the NEW

AOL.com.

(http://www.aol.com/?optin=new-dp & icid=aolcom40vanity & ncid=emlcntaolcom00000002)

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 11/27/2008 7:31:40 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

kcboone@... writes:

Very interesting. Sounds like she prefers the routine as many ASD children

do. Do you have other children? Can anyone else cover the dolls up or is that

a 'parents' job in her eyes?

HI again Karmen,

No other children here. Since it is only us, my husband and I, then we are

the ones to cover the dolls. I think she'd be OK with someone else doing it if

we weren't here as the most important thing I think is to " hide " them in the

bed.

Melinda

**************Life should be easier. So should your homepage. Try the NEW

AOL.com.

(http://www.aol.com/?optin=new-dp & icid=aolcom40vanity & ncid=emlcntaolcom00000002)