Guest guest Posted August 19, 2002 Report Share Posted August 19, 2002 Don't you worry about what others think about your divorces, Lynn and Stacey. As you said, Lynn, you are the only one who knows what the situation was and what needed to be done. Nobody else has any business saying anything about it. They don't have to live with the consequences of either staying in a bad relationship (OF YOURS!) or dissolving that relationship (again, OF YOURS not theirs!) - only you do. Interesting that most people keep mum when obviously bad things are happening in a marriage, but their jaws don't stop flapping when it comes to divorce time. I say to the meddlers, WHO ASKED YA? Re: [ ] Faith and Loneliness-Lynn > Hi Stacey, > I have had all that said to me and worse. My children were older when I > divorced and I even had someone say, it was harder on them because they were > older. I beg to differ my children came to court with me and sat with me. There > so called father didn't even speak to them. I divorced my husband and so did my > children. I just won't listen to what people say or don't say. We lived the > nightmare with him and I know we did the right thing. So it takes me back to my > belief, if you didn't live it don't comment on it. We are so much happier > without him, he had become such an embarrassment. I knew my kids deserved > better. I wish there was someone in my life, maybe it is God's plan down the > line. See I use to think God was mad at me for the divorce but I know he is > not. I had to loss some catholic teaching before I realized this. Know you did > what was best, you know it and that is all that matters. > Lynn (MeMom) > > bintherdunit@... wrote: > > > Hi Lynn > > I have to agree with you that being alone is better than being in a bad > > marriage. I did have some people say that I was a bad mother for depriving > > my son of his father. I came back with the same reply that you have. I am > > not depriving him of his father. His father just can't live with us. > > Sometimes it is better not to have one than to have a terrible one and be > > psychologically scarred. I also do not want a bar person. That type of life > > is definitely not for me. I guess I'll just have to wait a little longer. > > Hugs, > > Stacey in PA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 20, 2002 Report Share Posted August 20, 2002 I have heard a lot of women on this site talk about being outcasts (more or less) in their families, etc. for " divorcing " . Seems our friends and " family " all of a sudden have " biblical values " , etc. of STAYING MARRIED. Well that is not correct. There are excellent Christian Counselors out there who differ on Church/divorce. And they are there to help people not feel guilt for it. This is an excellent book and site on the subject. And does back up things with scriptures. For those of you raised in the church and now divorced or contemplating it. The subject here (the LINK below) is mainly ABUSE without BEATING (Physical). It is very well written. And does not minimize Verbal and Emotional abuse as not being " abuse " . It puts Verbal/Emotional right up there with Beating. And stresses it causes just as much if not more damage. And can have the same results. Sorry this was so long. But ABUSE in a marriage ... any marriage... has a place in my heart. And Women need to bond together... not point and turn their backs on other women. (some cases it is also Men abused.) This link brings you to the page of EXTREME VERBAL ABUSE. I live this. http://www.gospelcom.net/rbc/ds/cb011/page4.html There are also links to the Other Pages at the bottom of this article. http://www.gospelcom.net/rbc/ds/cb011/cb011.html#page3 Love, Susie wrote: > Don't you worry about what others think about your divorces, Lynn and > > Stacey. As you said, Lynn, you are the only one who knows what the > situation was and what needed to be done. Nobody else has any business > > saying anything about it. They don't have to live with the > consequences > of either staying in a bad relationship (OF YOURS!) or dissolving that > > relationship (again, OF YOURS not theirs!) - only you do. Interesting > that most people keep mum when obviously bad things are happening in a > > marriage, but their jaws don't stop flapping when it comes to divorce > time. I say to the meddlers, WHO ASKED YA? > > > > > > Re: [ ] Faith and Loneliness-Lynn > > > > Hi Stacey, > > I have had all that said to me and worse. My children were > older > when I > > divorced and I even had someone say, it was harder on them because > they were > > older. I beg to differ my children came to court with me and sat > with > me. There > > so called father didn't even speak to them. I divorced my husband > and > so did my > > children. I just won't listen to what people say or don't say. We > lived the > > nightmare with him and I know we did the right thing. So it takes me > > back to my > > belief, if you didn't live it don't comment on it. We are so much > happier > > without him, he had become such an embarrassment. I knew my kids > deserved > > better. I wish there was someone in my life, maybe it is God's plan > > down the > > line. See I use to think God was mad at me for the divorce but I > know > he is > > not. I had to loss some catholic teaching before I realized this. > Know you did > > what was best, you know it and that is all that matters. > > Lynn (MeMom) > > > > bintherdunit@... wrote: > > > > > Hi Lynn > > > I have to agree with you that being alone is better than being in > a > bad > > > marriage. I did have some people say that I was a bad mother for > depriving > > > my son of his father. I came back with the same reply that you > have. I am > > > not depriving him of his father. His father just can't live with > us. > > > Sometimes it is better not to have one than to have a terrible one > > and be > > > psychologically scarred. I also do not want a bar person. That > type of life > > > is definitely not for me. I guess I'll just have to wait a little > > longer. > > > Hugs, > > > Stacey in PA > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 20, 2002 Report Share Posted August 20, 2002 Thanks for the links, Susie. Great supportive information. I needed that. Love and Hugs Stacey in PA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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