Re: messy /disorganized ASD

December 29, 2008

I think some of my frustration is that I'm so unorganized that when I

try it takes days to get one room clean, I mean with going through

with papers & throwing out what needs to go & keep what needs to be

kept, going through closets, etc. I get so overwhelmed & think if

keeping things organized takes this much time there's no way I'll have

time & so I just give up. I think this is why many of us chronically

disorganized people stay that way. If I'm in a very organized setting

I can keep it that way. Also, when I was an office manager I was

freakish about keeping files organized & such. Strange how I could

manage it there but at home it's so much more overwhelming. But at an

office I was the only one regularly getting into it, here I have 4

messy people. Hubby being one of the worst!

I also think growing up poor makes it worse. Hubby doesn't want to

throw away the most annoying things, like an old Rainbow vaccuum

nozzle. He gets it in his head that he can use that, fix that & make a

few bucks, etc. Then before you know it we have an entire house of

that sort of thing. Very annoying, then they want to argue when we

tell them it's time to get rid of all that stuff. They won't fix them

but won't get rid of them either.

Allie I ask her " keep or get rid of " for artwork. She has reams of

copy paper that she's colored, cut, glued, etc. I tell her if it's a

keep to put it in a specific cubby on her desk, if it's clean put it

in another specific place, & the pieces of cut paper throw away. she

gets the concept, I think it's just so overwhelming for her to do it

because I wait too long to get her going on it. She also has dozens of

various markers, twistables, crayons, etc. We've made boxes for each

type, but she hates taking the time to organize them all, she'd rather

have them in a mess on the floor.

Debi

December 29, 2008

There is no way hannah would organise her drawings to what to keep and what to

throw....thats when i go in and just throw the lot. sometimes if i see a

particular piece that i can see she put alot of work into, a cartoon with lots

of speech bubbles etc, i will keep..........but mostly it all goes. At first i

suggested a box under her bed, but it just overflows all over the

floor...........so no other choice.......

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls@...: fightingautism@...: Tue, 30

Dec 2008 04:32:44 +0000Subject: Re: messy /disorganized ASD

I think some of my frustration is that I'm so unorganized that when Itry it

takes days to get one room clean, I mean with going throughwith papers &

throwing out what needs to go & keep what needs to bekept, going through

closets, etc. I get so overwhelmed & think ifkeeping things organized takes this

much time there's no way I'll havetime & so I just give up. I think this is why

many of us chronicallydisorganized people stay that way. If I'm in a very

organized settingI can keep it that way. Also, when I was an office manager I

wasfreakish about keeping files organized & such. Strange how I couldmanage it

there but at home it's so much more overwhelming. But at anoffice I was the only

one regularly getting into it, here I have 4messy people. Hubby being one of the

worst!I also think growing up poor makes it worse. Hubby doesn't want tothrow

away the most annoying things, like an old Rainbow vaccuumnozzle. He gets it in

his head that he can use that, fix that & make afew bucks, etc. Then before you

know it we have an entire house ofthat sort of thing. Very annoying, then they

want to argue when wetell them it's time to get rid of all that stuff. They

won't fix thembut won't get rid of them either. Allie I ask her " keep or get rid

of " for artwork. She has reams ofcopy paper that she's colored, cut, glued, etc.

I tell her if it's akeep to put it in a specific cubby on her desk, if it's

clean put itin another specific place, & the pieces of cut paper throw away.

shegets the concept, I think it's just so overwhelming for her to do itbecause I

wait too long to get her going on it. She also has dozens ofvarious markers,

twistables, crayons, etc. We've made boxes for eachtype, but she hates taking

the time to organize them all, she'd ratherhave them in a mess on the floor.Debi

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December 30, 2008

Debi, some of the things one can buy to help is of those little

plastic dresser sort of bins and label of them. and make this a daily

chore things as part of the over all responsibility for her such as

one day it is of clean the papers and art and the next the markers,

and the next another object. but each day she is of to do a task to

help teach organize skills.

so like if it is of marker day, have a sibling help her by to get all

teh things into one box and then take of her little bins for them

into the kitchen table areas and set the big box full of markers on a

chair and have her work on sorting until the big box is of empty ,

when done let of her have a token of a quarter to put into a jar,

this way she earns her allowence in see-able gains for the work.

these little skills are of very important for over all long term life

skills. it begins early in the life and needs to be fo worked with

over and over and as shared had worked with my aimee for years and

now at age of 21 she is of getting it and managing better at

organizing. she does get overwhelmed such as at christmas time the

home of her went to a huge mess and she had of tears in overwhelmed

saying she will never be of able to get it back to clean. I to

repeated of how to break down a task. having her start with

collecting all the dishes in the home from room to room and then wash

of them first. and so the list went and she did get it all back to

order. she was so calm she did try of to make pumpkin pies by scratch

for the first time and she was of so happy in them she called and

asked me to come and get of one of them. they were of not too bad for

a first time to try of to make of pies.

cheryl for you daughter i would not be to work on keep and throw away

for her but just getting the work into a bin that helps her keep of

it into a specified place and each weekend things tell her she needs

to take 5 or 10 of them and keep of them and then you place of that

art into a keep bin and the rest you can toss away. as she works on

keeping it clean she earns more paper for her art, so if she tosses

away much then give of her 20-25 papers for the up coming week for

her to do art with. this way she is of earning the supplies for the

art as her reward for cleaning up some of the mess.

same with her books, she can have of them but she is of like a

library sort of things for her she can have of 2-3 of them but when

she returns of them to you she can pick out 2-3 different ones this

helps her organize the amount of clutter and to set a boundary of how

much she is of able to manage to clean up.

then all toys just simply go into a toy box so she does not have to

organize of them yet because we are of just working on the books and

papers for her for now.

sondra

December 30, 2008

Debi... When did you sneak into my house and take over my life? LOL!

Your home sounds just like mine!

I want to be organized and I'd love to have my home look like those who live

in the houses that look like they could be a model home, but I just don't

have the space to store all the clutter! LOL

And while I know I'm bad, it's not just me... Although my clutter is in more

of a mess than hubby's, but he is like your husband, never throwing anything

away because of the chance to use it later or sell it. And yes, it also

comes from not having much growing up. Our kids have a lot more than either

of us did growing up, and I do have to admit that it's because he can fix

nearly anything and so there are times that we find something good that just

needs something fixed.

Most recent example is a Plasma tv! We found it on Craigslist that someone

was giving away because it didn't work anymore, we got it and DH fixed it

and now we have a 33 inch plasma tv. Now where we're gonna put it is beyond

me cause we already have TV's in all the rooms! LOL But no way he'll give it

up.

He will sell somethings and every once in a great while he'll go through and

toss some stuff, but it's never enough to make it completely decluttered.

At times I wish we could move JUST so I could pack up everything and only

unpack what we need and just ignore the rest! LOL

Theresa

>

> I think some of my frustration is that I'm so unorganized that when I

> try it takes days to get one room clean, I mean with going through

> with papers & throwing out what needs to go & keep what needs to be

> kept, going through closets, etc. I get so overwhelmed & think if

> keeping things organized takes this much time there's no way I'll have

> time & so I just give up. I think this is why many of us chronically

> disorganized people stay that way. If I'm in a very organized setting

> I can keep it that way. Also, when I was an office manager I was

> freakish about keeping files organized & such. Strange how I could

> manage it there but at home it's so much more overwhelming. But at an

> office I was the only one regularly getting into it, here I have 4

> messy people. Hubby being one of the worst!

>

> I also think growing up poor makes it worse. Hubby doesn't want to

> throw away the most annoying things, like an old Rainbow vaccuum

> nozzle. He gets it in his head that he can use that, fix that & make a

> few bucks, etc. Then before you know it we have an entire house of

> that sort of thing. Very annoying, then they want to argue when we

> tell them it's time to get rid of all that stuff. They won't fix them

> but won't get rid of them either.

>

> Allie I ask her " keep or get rid of " for artwork. She has reams of

> copy paper that she's colored, cut, glued, etc. I tell her if it's a

> keep to put it in a specific cubby on her desk, if it's clean put it

> in another specific place, & the pieces of cut paper throw away. she

> gets the concept, I think it's just so overwhelming for her to do it

> because I wait too long to get her going on it. She also has dozens of

> various markers, twistables, crayons, etc. We've made boxes for each

> type, but she hates taking the time to organize them all, she'd rather

> have them in a mess on the floor.

>

> Debi

>

December 30, 2008

I go through the " try really hard + give up " cycle here too.