Talk about puberty is scaring me

[Guest guest]

All this talk about girls reaching puberty and changing for the worse is really

starting to

worry me. Sometimes the only thing that gets me through is concentrating on the

little

progresses. Then I read about girls getting aggressive and taking steps back.

I keep hoping

that this can only get better.

Now granted my daughter is very HF so I sometimes think that she will " outgrow "

some of

this as long as I keep working with her.

Moms of HF girls, do you find that this is true? Do I really have to prepare

myself for a major

change in a few years.

Also my almost 8 year old daughter is very talll, 4'9 " and already weighs 64

pounds. I am

really trying to keep her slim so we can push off puberty as long as possible.

I started at 11

so I don't know how much that will help. I keep meaning to ask my mother-n-law

when she

started but she's not the open and honest type.

Thanks for listening,

Rebekah

[Guest guest]

rebeka not all girls on the spectrum are of alike so not all will

escalate to the aggressive behaviors or become SIB or in crisis levels.

But many do. it does seem to get better but there is of a time I to

noted that for about 2-4 years things do get harder as the child

develops rapidly and has of those horomonal shifts. some even begin of

cycling into these sorts of behaviors a year or more before even

developing the breast buds because the hormones are of already

preparing of her body to develop into a young woman even when you cant

be of to see the outward signs of it. then it usually can last for

about a year or 2 after the monthly starts but it is of not always a

daily things but a cycling things.

Even though adult now I to still be of female andmy body os fo going

through the new changes that happen to womans of this age and it is of

creating the same sorts of affects the puberty things did for me. I to

started to have of a emotional crash but it seems to be fo fading some

for me this day even though the brain is of still buzzing inside of me

and the brain and body sorts of feels like a numb effect. any little

thing causes me to escalate to tears and panic sorts of states of being

and if people begin of to have of words to me my anxiety builds to

where my arms and legs shake so much so so that it appears as if cold

and shivering but not. when typing the words are of clear for me but

when speaking them they come disconencted and not clear.

the whole stress of this cause of me to be of more tense which impacts

the fibromyalgia and this is of not a good domino things for me.

But this night at my therapist met of a new hire who is of a behavior

specialist who is of going to be of maybe begin of working for me and

my missy and to observe of the family dynamics to help of me not keep

going to crisis so hopefully he can be of to see what is of triggering

me and how to know what supports i to have of NOT have in the life of

me. He will also be of to help of me utilize of some functional visuals

and thigns because been of so depressed for 3-4 years now cant seem to

function and organize of self or the home of me because overwhelmed and

just trying to stay functional moment to moment not day to day.

so yes some girls on the spectrum do much well and others do not.

sondra

[Guest guest]

Rebekah

I don't have much time but just wanted to say that even if things get more

difficult in one area ( and they may not) , things will get easier in another.

I think back to the things I used to do, like lugging a potty around over my

shoulder in a big green trash bag wherever we went, had to be the exact same

potty I had at home and they had in school, or else my DD wouldn't use it.

And this is when she was four, five, up to six years old. How I used to have

to talk constantly when we were in the car, telling stories over and over

without a break, and how on long car rides like the 2.5 hours to, and 2/5 hours

from, visiting my sister, I almost lost my voice. Or how I had to be quick to

shield babies and men with bald heads because my DD had to hit them .Or how

my DD vomited from anxiety before school for a year and a half before I

finally found the right meds to ease things for her. And I almost never think

about

those things anymore because they passed. I can even smile and laugh about

them. So yes, puberty brings new challenges, but also some new developmental

leaps and some new ease. You'll see, things will ease in some ways even if

they get harder in other ways, and you and she will grow and stretch to

accommodate whatever challenges you'll face. Meantime, breathe and try enjoy

whatever is right now. You may never see those behaviors you fear.

Take care,

Melinda

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[Guest guest]

Rebekah,

My 17 year old hfa does have some mood swings before and during her period.

She is very easy to burst into tears about things and will snap at me for

what I think is no reason at all. It is something we are both aware of and

try to accommodate. She has done relatively well with handling the changing

aspect of her period, but still has to be reminded to take additional

protection along during her " time of the month " . I try to check her bags

before her going to school to check on her taking pads with her.

She has in the past, tried to hit me during one of these times. This is

something that we have talked about on more than one occasion. So far she

hasn't actually hit me.

Dianna

-- Talk about puberty is scaring me

All this talk about girls reaching puberty and changing for the worse is

really starting to

worry me. Sometimes the only thing that gets me through is concentrating on

the little

progresses. Then I read about girls getting aggressive and taking steps back

I keep hoping

that this can only get better.

Now granted my daughter is very HF so I sometimes think that she will

outgrow " some of

this as long as I keep working with her.

Moms of HF girls, do you find that this is true? Do I really have to prepare

myself for a major

change in a few years.

Also my almost 8 year old daughter is very talll, 4'9 " and already weighs 64

pounds. I am

really trying to keep her slim so we can push off puberty as long as

possible. I started at 11

so I don't know how much that will help. I keep meaning to ask my

mother-n-law when she

started but she's not the open and honest type.

Thanks for listening,

Rebekah

[Guest guest]

> Moms of HF girls, do you find that this is true? Do I really have to

> prepare myself for a major change in a few years.

>

In my case, not only did I not go through the drastic changes described

for some autistics, I didn't even go through the kind of changes most

kids go through. I went through all the physical changes normally, but

I didn't have the emotional changes. I'm asexual, for one thing - I

have never had a crush on anyone (I did, however, misinterpret

nonsexual liking for crushes, which apparently also happens with gay

kids) and have absolutely no interest in sex. This has spared me a lot

of the confusion and trouble many teens experience. I also have had

none of the adolescent rebellion and desire to assert my own

individuality by rejecting my parents (not that I don't assert my own

individuality, but I do so by analyzing myself and following my dreams

rather than just rejecting someone else's values). I actually didn't

have the 'terrible twos' either, so maybe that's related.

I've heard that some autistics go through some of the emotional changes

of puberty in their twenties instead of their teens. As a 19 year old,

I don't know yet if that'll be the case for me. In any case, the

adjustment isn't as hard for a young adult having their first crushes

and so on as it is for a teen.

So, no, it doesn't have to be so hard. In fact, for some autistics it's

easier than usual.

Ettina

[Guest guest]

Thank you, I guess I will just be prepared and if it doesn't happen I will be

grateful.

Rebekah

>

> Subject: Re: Talk about puberty is scaring me

> To: Autism_in_Girls

> Date: Thursday, December 4, 2008, 8:08 PM

> rebeka not all girls on the spectrum are of alike so not all

> will

> escalate to the aggressive behaviors or become SIB or in

> crisis levels.

> But many do. it does seem to get better but there is of a

> time I to

> noted that for about 2-4 years things do get harder as the

> child

> develops rapidly and has of those horomonal shifts. some

> even begin of

> cycling into these sorts of behaviors a year or more before

> even

> developing the breast buds because the hormones are of

> already

> preparing of her body to develop into a young woman even

> when you cant

> be of to see the outward signs of it. then it usually can

> last for

> about a year or 2 after the monthly starts but it is of not

> always a

> daily things but a cycling things.

>

> Even though adult now I to still be of female andmy body os

> fo going

> through the new changes that happen to womans of this age

> and it is of

> creating the same sorts of affects the puberty things did

> for me. I to

> started to have of a emotional crash but it seems to be fo

> fading some

> for me this day even though the brain is of still buzzing

> inside of me

> and the brain and body sorts of feels like a numb effect.

> any little

> thing causes me to escalate to tears and panic sorts of

> states of being

> and if people begin of to have of words to me my anxiety

> builds to

> where my arms and legs shake so much so so that it appears

> as if cold

> and shivering but not. when typing the words are of clear

> for me but

> when speaking them they come disconencted and not clear.

>

> the whole stress of this cause of me to be of more tense

> which impacts

> the fibromyalgia and this is of not a good domino things

> for me.

>

> But this night at my therapist met of a new hire who is of

> a behavior

> specialist who is of going to be of maybe begin of working

> for me and

> my missy and to observe of the family dynamics to help of

> me not keep

> going to crisis so hopefully he can be of to see what is of

> triggering

> me and how to know what supports i to have of NOT have in

> the life of

> me. He will also be of to help of me utilize of some

> functional visuals

> and thigns because been of so depressed for 3-4 years now

> cant seem to

> function and organize of self or the home of me because

> overwhelmed and

> just trying to stay functional moment to moment not day to

> day.

>

> so yes some girls on the spectrum do much well and others

> do not.

> sondra

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 12/4/2008 9:10:45 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

rjoyh2o@... writes:

almost 8 year old daughter is very talll, 4'9 " and already weighs 64 pounds.

I am

really trying to keep her slim so we can push off puberty as long as

possible. I started at 11

so I don't know how much that will help. I keep meaning to ask my

mother-n-law when she

started but she's not the open and honest type.

Thanks for listening,

Rebekah

sometimes it just comes wieght doesn't matter.

i understand the worry

eric abbys dad

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favorite sites in one place. Try it now.

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