the leaving of a founder and moderator of the Friends Group

[Guest guest]

As usual, I have tried to be diplomatic and thus failed in my attempt

to clarify anything.

The following is probably more than you want to know... but in the

interest of trying to set enquiries to rest, I will try to address

the difficulty:

Marta has been a dear friend to me... and a foundation of

the " Friends " Group. She was with me from the beginning of starting

the Friends group. Her first post was the 21st post on the group...

and she was the first moderator to the group (in addition to

myself). (If you're wondering... yes, I have almost every post ever

made on the group!) When I started talking about the group, Marta

agreed to be there as an integral part of the group... and has well

lived up to the role of being a part of the group foundation.

Marta has chosen to leave because she and I disagreed about the

banning of a member. I have chosen to keep the member on a moderated

status.

I take banning people from the group very, very seriously -- and we

have used it VERY sparingly over the many years of this group's

existence.

Within the first month of the group (2002), we had a major

controversy with 3 people who caused a great deal of heartache.

There were castigations of Dr. Keshishian by these people... and

abusiveness toward group members. They were banned after I sent them

all a myriad of letters off group to try to resolve the problem.

In 2004 we banned another member after 4-5 letters of warning by me

(off group). She was requested to stop her abusiveness on the group,

was placed on moderated posts for a while... and was finally banned

because of using the F bomb on the moderators. She was WELL WARNED.

In 2006 another member was banned after getting a fellow member to

send costly items and subsequently failing to pay for those items.

Over the years there have been a few instances where individuals were

put on moderated status in order to give tempers time to cool... and

to ensure that we did not have a lot of flaming back and forth.

Letters were written OFF GROUP by moderators to try to resolve the

conflict... and we were fortunate because we were able to resolve the

problem AND retain the members.

It would have been my hope to do so this time.

In the end... I am the list owner... be it good or bad. Right now,

trust me... it feels bad. I made a decision to keep a member... and

that has cost me a friend, and the group one of its founders.

Marta, you are surely missed.

Elle