Re: Can I Please Have a Morning Without Tears (from my kid???). A Rant.

[Guest guest]

Hi Dana,

I'm sorry your going through this now! I do know how you feel! You vent all you

want! Sometimes we need to, and besides that is what this group is here for!

((((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))

Judy

[Guest guest]

I'm dealing with the same type of thing right now. I've been having

to get my daughter (12 y/o) out of bed, once physically putting her

in the shower, to get her to school. Today, she is outright defying

getting in the car. Her therapist said to call the police for

assistance if I have to. I can't believe it would come to that. I'm

not engaging in a power struggle and I understand that her life is

hard and hellish living with OCD. It's such a struggle and balancing

act. Thank goodness I have all of you here to understand.

>

> Sorry, I need this rant.

>

> My little guy (9) has had a miserable ear/sinus infection for

about a

> week and when he gets under the weather, the OCD really cranks up

in

> the form of asking for things and just generally being a non-

compliant

> pill.

>

> EVERY morning he gets up and I can tell by the thud of his feet on

the

> stairs that it's going to be one of " those " mornings. You know,

when

> you hear the stomp as opposed to the normal tread, you have to

> mentally prepare for the onslaught.

>

> Immediately his questions start: " Do I have to go to

school? " " WHY

> do I have to go to school? " " I get tired at school... " etc.

>

> I've been saying, " I'm not answering this. Yes, you're going... "

and

> I walk away.

>

> Then he follows me screaming, " YOU ALWAYS SAY NO!!! I hate it

here!

> You're so unfair!! " ...ad nauseum.

>

> Tears actually started welling up in my eyes 2 days ago because I

knew

> what was coming and I thought, " I just want to exercise, drink my

> coffee and go to work without this nonsense. I don't want the

> freakin' battle. "

>

> Yesterday, he ran up to his room, slammed the door and just said he

> wasn't going.

>

> Eventually he went, but the whole time I kept thinking, " I can't

stand

> much more of this... "

>

> For two days, he's gone to the bus stop crying, saying he hates me,

> etc. I feel like such a monster.

>

> Once at school, his teachers say he's fine.

>

> Sorry, I'm just SO SICK of this...

>

> Thanks for reading!

>

> Dana

>

[Guest guest]

Another cyber (((((((HUG))))))))to you!

We all know how hard this is. I don't know what's going on but everyone here

seems to be having a really hard time this Spring! Including me!!!!

Try to hang in there!

Hugs

Judy

[Guest guest]

Judy,

How is your son doing? Have you seen any improvement?

in TN

jchabot wrote:

Another cyber (((((((HUG))))))))to you!

We all know how hard this is. I don't know what's going on but everyone here

seems to be having a really hard time this Spring! Including me!!!!

Try to hang in there!

Hugs

Judy

[Guest guest]

Judy -

I agree this is a hard spring. For my son, it's school. He said he is done - he

can't wait until summer vacation. And after the year my son's had, I don't

blame him. We are literally counting down the days till summer. He and I are

both exhausted!

hugs,

angela

Subject: Re: Re: Can I Please Have a Morning Without Tears

(from my kid???). A Rant.

To:

Date: Friday, May 16, 2008, 10:29 AM

Another cyber (((((((HUG)) ))))))to you!

We all know how hard this is. I don't know what's going on but everyone here

seems to be having a really hard time this Spring! Including me!!!!

Try to hang in there!

Hugs

Judy

[Guest guest]

Hang in there, they only have school for so much longer...

As others have said, it seems to be difficult for a lot of people this spring.

For us, my

daughter's OCD gets worse when she's ill too. Every spring her allergies flare

up and she is

covered in eczema until the next winter. Her rituals and behaviour gets worse

when she is

so uncomfortable. The psychiatrist thinks her throat clearing is a tic...but it

is so clearly

tied to her allergies, I think he's 100% wrong on that one. Add in the fact that

we have so

much more daylight, and we've got lack of sleep on top of it (it's really hard

to go to bed

when it is still light out!)

My anxious son is worse right now too. Mornings have become a battle every

single day. It

takes my daughter the whole hour to get dressed, she misses breakfast

altogether. At

least she is motivated to not miss the bus! Alas, she is only 5 so she can only

assert so

much will...I've afraid for when she is older.

I think we are all ready for school to be done. Too bad *we* still have 6 weeks

to go... Ugh.

>

> Sorry, I need this rant.

>

> My little guy (9) has had a miserable ear/sinus infection for about a

> week and when he gets under the weather, the OCD really cranks up in

> the form of asking for things and just generally being a non-compliant

> pill.

>

> EVERY morning he gets up and I can tell by the thud of his feet on the

> stairs that it's going to be one of " those " mornings. You know, when

> you hear the stomp as opposed to the normal tread, you have to

> mentally prepare for the onslaught.

>

> Immediately his questions start: " Do I have to go to school? " " WHY

> do I have to go to school? " " I get tired at school... " etc.

>

> I've been saying, " I'm not answering this. Yes, you're going... " and

> I walk away.

>

> Then he follows me screaming, " YOU ALWAYS SAY NO!!! I hate it here!

> You're so unfair!! " ...ad nauseum.

>

> Tears actually started welling up in my eyes 2 days ago because I knew

> what was coming and I thought, " I just want to exercise, drink my

> coffee and go to work without this nonsense. I don't want the

> freakin' battle. "

>

> Yesterday, he ran up to his room, slammed the door and just said he

> wasn't going.

>

> Eventually he went, but the whole time I kept thinking, " I can't stand

> much more of this... "

>

> For two days, he's gone to the bus stop crying, saying he hates me,

> etc. I feel like such a monster.

>

> Once at school, his teachers say he's fine.

>

> Sorry, I'm just SO SICK of this...

>

> Thanks for reading!

>

> Dana

>

[Guest guest]

Hey Dana,

Hugs to you. Sorry you've had some rough mornings lately. The

OCD usually is worse when they are sick. Our son with OCD is 17.

The beginning of the school year this year was rough for us. We

didn't know he had OCD. He was having a lot of anxiety about school

and having panic attacks many mornings getting ready for school. He

was missing a lot of school. Many mornings he would say he just

couldn't go to school. I hated having to make those phone calls to

the attendance office at school. Many of those mornings I ended up

in tears. We ended up getting our son in a homebound program

because he was missing so much school and we didn't know what was

causing the anxiety. Now we know it was OCD. We hoped he would be

able to return to school sometime this year, but that hasn't

happened. I'm glad your son is fine once he gets to school. But it

is hard seeing them struggle and hearing them say hurtful things.

It's the anxiety and the OCD that makes them say it. Hang in there.

Take care

Connie

>

> Sorry, I need this rant.

>

> My little guy (9) has had a miserable ear/sinus infection for

about a

> week and when he gets under the weather, the OCD really cranks up

in

> the form of asking for things and just generally being a non-

compliant

> pill.

>

> EVERY morning he gets up and I can tell by the thud of his feet on

the

> stairs that it's going to be one of " those " mornings. You know,

when

> you hear the stomp as opposed to the normal tread, you have to

> mentally prepare for the onslaught.

>

> Immediately his questions start: " Do I have to go to

school? " " WHY

> do I have to go to school? " " I get tired at school... " etc.

>

> I've been saying, " I'm not answering this. Yes, you're going... "

and

> I walk away.

>

> Then he follows me screaming, " YOU ALWAYS SAY NO!!! I hate it

here!

> You're so unfair!! " ...ad nauseum.

>

> Tears actually started welling up in my eyes 2 days ago because I

knew

> what was coming and I thought, " I just want to exercise, drink my

> coffee and go to work without this nonsense. I don't want the

> freakin' battle. "

>

> Yesterday, he ran up to his room, slammed the door and just said he

> wasn't going.

>

> Eventually he went, but the whole time I kept thinking, " I can't

stand

> much more of this... "

>

> For two days, he's gone to the bus stop crying, saying he hates me,

> etc. I feel like such a monster.

>

> Once at school, his teachers say he's fine.

>

> Sorry, I'm just SO SICK of this...

>

> Thanks for reading!

>

> Dana

>

[Guest guest]

Dana

I am so sorry. I know it is so hard to deal with day after day like that. I hope

you can find some peace from it this weekend and can have someone stay home with

your son so you can go exercise and relax with a cup of joe at Starbucks and

have a little peace. Hope it gets better soon.

Can I Please Have a Morning Without Tears (from my

kid???). A Rant.

Sorry, I need this rant.

My little guy (9) has had a miserable ear/sinus infection for about a

week and when he gets under the weather, the OCD really cranks up in

the form of asking for things and just generally being a non-compliant

pill.

EVERY morning he gets up and I can tell by the thud of his feet on the

stairs that it's going to be one of " those " mornings. You know, when

you hear the stomp as opposed to the normal tread, you have to

mentally prepare for the onslaught.

Immediately his questions start: " Do I have to go to school? " " WHY

do I have to go to school? " " I get tired at school... " etc.

I've been saying, " I'm not answering this. Yes, you're going... " and

I walk away.

Then he follows me screaming, " YOU ALWAYS SAY NO!!! I hate it here!

You're so unfair!! " ... ad nauseum.

Tears actually started welling up in my eyes 2 days ago because I knew

what was coming and I thought, " I just want to exercise, drink my

coffee and go to work without this nonsense. I don't want the

freakin' battle. "

Yesterday, he ran up to his room, slammed the door and just said he

wasn't going.

Eventually he went, but the whole time I kept thinking, " I can't stand

much more of this... "

For two days, he's gone to the bus stop crying, saying he hates me,

etc. I feel like such a monster.

Once at school, his teachers say he's fine.

Sorry, I'm just SO SICK of this...

Thanks for reading!

Dana

[Guest guest]

Hi, Dana. Our son has gone through more health problems and issues

this year then he has in his whole life.

Two ER visits, one for an emergency appendectomy, one for an inner ear

infection with severe vertigo. He's had heart tests (which freaked

him out), and sinus CAT scans, which resulted in them wanting to do

surgery, which we've opted out of for now,. . .He's had 3 sinus

infections, 2 ear infections, pneumonia, and his OCD flared BIG time

right before all the sickness hit. With every single thing, his OCD

would flare back up. It's so frustrating, because he would level out

for a bit and life would start to feel normal, then something new

would hit. Recently, he finally got his braces off, which is an

adventure in itself in a kid with OCD, and now he had to have his

wisdom teeth out. He had the bottom two out the other day and lo and

behold, his anxiety came back last night . . Which really makes us

look forward to having the other two wisdom teeth out in January. . NOT!

Anyway, I guess it was a long winded way of saying every little hiccup

in our son's life causes his OCD to flare back up. Some were big

hiccups, and some have been as small as having a cold. But, his OCD

has been pretty predictable for following it all.

We've been through the tears too. It's so incredibly frustrating and

heartbreaking to go through that I don't know how someone does it

without tears.

I can often tell by the look on our son's face, rather then his walk.

I think when you live with someone who has it, you can just sense

when it's not right. It never ceases to feel like someone has kicked

you in the stomach though.

I agree with Connie. I think it is his frustration and OCD talking,

saying he hates you. When our son starts questions (during movies),

we did some ERP where he was to try to not question, and if he did, we

were to say, " I can't say " . It frustrated him a lot at first, but it

gradually got better. I think they strike out at times, and it's a

place where they feel safe to do so. I think they know Mom will not

stop loving them, even when they exhibit unlovable behavior.

I hope he gets better soon, and things stabilize for you. For us too.

It wears one out, huh?

Hugs,

BJ

>

> Sorry, I need this rant.

>

> My little guy (9) has had a miserable ear/sinus infection for about a

> week and when he gets under the weather, the OCD really cranks up in

> the form of asking for things and just generally being a non-compliant

> pill.

>

> EVERY morning he gets up and I can tell by the thud of his feet on the

> stairs that it's going to be one of " those " mornings. You know, when

> you hear the stomp as opposed to the normal tread, you have to

> mentally prepare for the onslaught.

>

> Immediately his questions start: " Do I have to go to school? " " WHY

> do I have to go to school? " " I get tired at school... " etc.

>

> I've been saying, " I'm not answering this. Yes, you're going... " and

> I walk away.

>

> Then he follows me screaming, " YOU ALWAYS SAY NO!!! I hate it here!

> You're so unfair!! " ...ad nauseum.

>

> Tears actually started welling up in my eyes 2 days ago because I knew

> what was coming and I thought, " I just want to exercise, drink my

> coffee and go to work without this nonsense. I don't want the

> freakin' battle. "

>

> Yesterday, he ran up to his room, slammed the door and just said he

> wasn't going.

>

> Eventually he went, but the whole time I kept thinking, " I can't stand

> much more of this... "

>

> For two days, he's gone to the bus stop crying, saying he hates me,

> etc. I feel like such a monster.

>

> Once at school, his teachers say he's fine.

>

> Sorry, I'm just SO SICK of this...

>

> Thanks for reading!

>

> Dana

>