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> Sorry for the cross post. My son is 4.5 and did ABA for a while which

> morphed into VB which is now morphing into NET (very little use of

> flashcards now). His language has improved dramatically, from about 35

> nouns at age 3 to testing as age appropriate in receptive language and mild

> delays in expressive language. He can ask questions (who, what, where,

> working on when and why and how) and is on the cusp of being conversational.

>

> My question is this. I had another little 4 year old over for a playdate, a

> girl, who is a few months younger than my son. She was talking about how

> she would be turning 5 and be going to kindergarten next year, and taking

> the bus, and riding with her friends, etc...

>

> And it occurred to me, that my own son HAS NO CLUE about something like

> that. I'm holding him back a year and he just has no idea, no clue that

> when kids turn 5 most kids do go to kindergarten and to the big school,

> etc...

>

> I talked to the little girl's mother, and she said that she hadn't mentioned

> kindergarten at all to her daughter, because she is considering holding her

> back a year to give her the " gift of time " , but that her daughter is picking

> it up from her friends at preschool and her friends around the neighborhood.

>

> So my question is this, what skill/skills is my son lacking that he can't

> pick up this kind of stuff from his peers, whereas the little girl CAN?

Isn't some of this observational learning, which many kids on the spectrum are

poor at (don't know what to pay attention to)? I see this w/my daughter to some

extent too. She pretty much listens when it's something she's already

interested in, and I'm still working on making her peers be interesting and

reinforcing to her. Another related factor: even though she also scores

age-appropriately for receptive and expressive language skills, she still has

trouble w/conversation and pragmatics, which is going to limit her

conversational interactions. If she can only do two or three volleys at a time,

that's going to limit the info she gets from others.

Just rambling--I'm sure others are much better informed.

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