Re: Forgetfullness?

[Guest guest]

There is No one more forgetful then I am...  My kids are constantly reminding ME

of what has to be done...   I think the last post, about repetition, is an

awesome one!   Before we leave the house, I let everyone know whats going to

happen (it's to remind me as well as the kids)... then, once we're at our

destination, I 'quiz' everyone... " Okay... what did I say before we left the

house? " .... That is usually a trigger for myself, as well as the kids... 

Another bonus, for someone like me..... wipe off boards!!!  wow, I have

several.    One on the fridge for family things... important dates, especially

( hubby, Lou, constantly forgets important stuff - because I wrote his mom and

dad's anniversary on  " The Board " , he actually remembered to call them last

night!)   I have one next to my computer desk, where I spend most of my time,

whether on the PC or not.... 

Then there are the Super Sticky, Large sized Post It notes!  

Of course, my kids are older (10 and 13) so they don't have a problem with

reading whats on my boards or stickies...

With smaller children, especially those who are " hyper "   or energetic..  I used

poster boards with pictures....  (my own systems, modified when the girls were

little).... I'd make a small graph....   in each box, I would put a clock with a

time of day....then, below the clock, I would put the digital clock.... below

that, I would put a picture of what would be happening at that time ( Ie:

toothbrushing, meal times, playtimes, showers, etc)....  it seemed to really

help the kids learn to tell time as well as keeping them informed of what was

expected of them

Kids seem to thrive on structure ... I suck at structure.. but these are the

ways that I had to do things.. otherwise *I* would forget, and the kids ended up

missing out on stuff at school, etc....  And I didn't want them to miss

out...when it was only *ME* that they could blame, since I'm " the Mom " ....

Hope this helps, even a little!

 

Candace Musmeci

CaeletNox@...

Newburgh, NY

 

~Dipping into the Living Well...One product at a time~

[Guest guest]

,

Do we have the same child??? My almost 9 y/o sounds very similiar to

yours. SHe too read at two years, and was reading chapter books at

4. She was reading WELL, long before she was potty trained at 4

1/2. She simply would not care if her britches were wet or full.

She remembers everything written, but can not remember anything

verbal. The suggestions people responded with I think are very, very

good. I am planning on implementing some of them.

I of course do not know for sure, but with MY child, I did a long

list of things that helped my daughter. CUtting sugar, using chore

charts and lists, post it notes, index cards, repetition and

reminders are all important in setting forgetful kids up for

success. Also diet is huge, and as Beth suggested candida can

be huge as can leaky gut. Primadolphilus is a wonderful supplement

for such kids and can really help.

But I personally continued to be frustrated and my daughter

complained over frustration herself and would frequently cry over

issues. As she got older, it was obvious she was VERY different from

other kids. And I realized all the things I was doing to help was

merely addressing the symptoms and I wanted to get to the root of the

actual problem.

I went through a long grueling process with many many so called

professionals, and it was horrible. We were accused of everything

from causing anxiety personality disorder in my precious baby, to

emotional abuse due to Christianity and homeschooling, sheltering my

child and thus preventing normal development, to bad parenting, and

my husband and I were told that we need therapy to learn proper

parenting so my daughter would be normal.

In the end, my daughter was diagnosed with sensory processing

disorder, which I personally think is probably caused by

environmental assault of her body in utero and after birth. Now, she

is working with a wonderful occupation therapist who CAN do things to

redirect neurological pathways in the brain AND give us coping skills

that are much more effective than general parenting advice that is

effective for all children (these kids are very different and have

very different needs than the average child).

Kathy DeBoer on this list runs a wonderful program and she can refer

you for on OT evaluation for SPD (Sensory processing disorder), or

you can go to the center, or you can use the center we go

to (we drive 45 minutes each way for great clinic called Advance

Therapy). There are also other places. Just make sure the OT's are

qualified to diganose SPD (many have not even heard of it!)

A great read in the mean time is called Sensational Kids. It was

soooo affirming that there was help for my daughter, and it was not

because my husband and I are awful Christian home schooling parents!

It was like the book was written all about my daughter!

The things in your post that make me suspicious that your daughter

should be evaluated for SPD are:

1)heartbroken when she cannot remember things (instructions, facts,

things to do, things you just said 5 seconds earlier, name of a

person or toy)

The fact that she is really really trying but is so smart tells me

something is not prcessing correctly. She is also upset, telling me

she is trying. It is also possible she is having a verbal processing

disorder, but an OT can look at that too.

2) works so hard at trying to listen but she get very easily

distracted.

This would be classified as ADD. I personally believe ADD is a

symptom not a disease and is very common with SPD. What happens is

their senses can not filter and they are completely overloaded with

stimulus and it is very overwhelming for them

3) If it helps at all- she is a very sensitive child (Sounds,

temperatures, etc.)

ALL SPD children are very sensitive to at least one stimulus. My dd

was very sensitive to sounds, and would cry if I ran the blender or

vaccuum. Her auditory was so overwhelmed, a loud noise would send

her into hyper fit because she simply could not cope with the input.

4) it takes her a long time to get the courage to do some things

(very trepidatious

My daughter is very much like that too. She is fearful because she

never knows what is going to send her over the edge in terms of

sensory input. Everything is scary for these kids (unless they are

under sensitive and they seek input, but that is obviously not your

daughter).

5) four and a half to " potty train " and is still having daily and

nightly incontinance

Very common for SPD kids.

Of course these things can also be other things, or even within the

norm of childhood, but your list makes me suspicious that she should

be evaluated for SPD.

I know you said to email you off list, but SPD is so common, and I

want to help people be aware of it, especially in the Trad food

community, because I do believe this is at least partially an

environmental and diet problem. (it is on the autism spectrum.)

If you want to email me privately, I am happy to talk to you via

email, phone, or in person. I know this is overwhelming and I am

happy to help, especially if I can prevent someone from going down

the accusation road that we walked.

Carol Frisk