happiness

[Guest guest]

,

Are you doing Son-Rise? Or have you gone to Option Institute or read

Kaufman's books? He had one by the title Happiness is a Choice.

On Wed, 9 Aug 2000 21:51:30 EDT, egroups wrote:

> Happiness is a Choice! Good for you!

> (Will and Ben's mom)

_______________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 11/12/01 9:08:04 AM, numbthumb2@... writes:

<< But quite literally everyone (Except my Dad) tells me " I just have to get

out of the house go places and have FUN be HAPPY!! " >>

I'm with you. Staying home most of the time keeps me happy. I do go to the

zoo twice a week, so I can say I've been out and that much walking is good,

but otherwise I'm happy to stay home. Our zoo doesn't smell and the plants

are beautiful year-round. :-)))

I used to travel, and I have seen as much of the world as I wish to, but now

I don't want to go anywhere. I have email and phone contact with people in

many states, Canada, Asia, Europe and the UK. Just yesterday I talked with a

Japanese friend by phone, and the day before with a friend in Switzerland.

That's as much contact as I need. My hubby still loves to travel and to meet

new people in person, so I send him off with my blessing. He has his

" vacation " away and I have mine at home while he's gone. Both of us are

happy. >^.^<

I don't think you're wrong. And you are mature enough to know what's best for

you, in my opinion.

Kat

Seattle

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 11/12/01 12:08:02 PM Eastern Standard Time,

numbthumb2@... writes:

> But quite literally everyone (Except my Dad) tells me " " I just have to

> get out of the house go places and have FUN be HAPPY!! " There in lies

> my quandary. I am having FUN and I am Happy right where I am, or as

> happy as one can be who is dealing with CMT.

>

> I am very interested in how the group feels. I realize there is no

> " Right or Wrong, black or White " , I am just interested in how you all

> feel.

>

> Thanks,

> dlc

Hi dlc, I go through the same things here on occassion, but I stand firm and

take care of me. Then there are times, I say the heck with it and do it, only

if it is something I really want to do.

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I think we each have to find our own comfort zone, which makes life much

easier. As long as you are happy and contented. I struggled with my

mum-in-law ( she has MS ) for a good number of years on this issue before

my CMT became difficult to deal with. I think it taught me a lot just to let her

cope at her own level which I now also do.

Good topic

Palombo

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 11/12/2001 9:08:01 AM Pacific Standard Time,

numbthumb2@... writes:

> I am very interested in how the group feels. I realize there is no

> " Right or Wrong, black or White " , I am just interested in how you all

> feel.

I am my happiest at home too. My neighbor is the sameway and he dosen't have

a medical problem. I think your family is worrying about you. Tell them you

have a job at home and can't leave or you will get fired. Haha

[Guest guest]

Hey DLC-

I completely agree with you. It's not like your depressed or afraid to

leave the home. You're just completely happy where you are! I believe

that you should have that right to do what you want to do....This is your

time in life..Your free time and if it's truly yours, you should be able

to do what you want with it....

Marzinski

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[Guest guest]

Answer to dlc

I feel a lot like you do. I go out if I feel like it and sometimes I just

have to get out. Some times I just like to stay at home and do nothing. Now

I know doing nothing is not good for a steady diet, so I try to do what I

want when I want. Going out at night (dark) alone is not for me. I have a

friend that goes to Florida each year and cannot understand why I want to

stay in the Michigan winters.......I like the change of seasons......looking

out the windows at the snow and ice covered trees.......like a winter

wonderland. Of course I stock up on goods so I do not have to get out. I do

get to church each week and joined a women's club that meets once a month

with a board meeting each month. If too much ice, I request a ride with

friends and they do not seem to mind. I am a 76yr old female that worked

until 72yrs old. My CMT was diagnosed when I was 50 yrs and started wearing

braces at 70yrs. I use a cane to get around out doors and walk inside,

keeping my balance by touching furniture. Do carry a walker in the car for

long distances.........

[Guest guest]

Hello,

I believe that it is your life and you could kindly but forcefully tell ones

who

think you must get out to be happy, that you are happy doing what you are

doing. That you would rather conserve your energy for things you enjoy

doing and not what they think you would enjoy doing. I mean really this

is your life, and you should be able to live it the way in which you choose.

Be not afraid to let others know that you are a person who has your

own mind and can make decisions that are best for you.

Thank You,

Heidi

numbthumb2@... wrote:

> Hi!

> I am hoping the group can help me with a little problem. I am happiest

> when I am in my home with all the things I have accumulated over the

> years, my art stuff, the PC (my window on the world) all the things I

> love to play with and work with, I am a 'researchaholic' I spend hours

> researching almost everything simply out of a desire to know. I want

> for little in my own little world, I have an opportunity to write,

> read, paint all the things I wanted to do before, but couldn't because

> of work and raising my daughters. ( I wouldn't have missed a moment of

> raising my girls!!).

>

> Now the problem; my family is constantly telling me how " I " NEED " to

> get out more! It's unhealthy to stay in the house! " (in Ohio there is

> only a few days a month one can get out when you walk the way I do!)

> They insist on taking me somewhere I have been dozens of times before,

> and have no interest in going back to. ((like walking through the

> smelly ZOO! (animals should be reserved for the dinner table ... just

> kidding!) I did that for my kids, now THEY can do it for their

> kids!)) I love it when my family or friends come to my home and chat

> or play chess out in the garden, or what ever, it's always great fun.

> But quite literally everyone (Except my Dad) tells me " " I just have to

> get out of the house go places and have FUN be HAPPY!! " There in lies

> my quandary. I am having FUN and I am Happy right where I am, or as

> happy as one can be who is dealing with CMT.

>

> I am very interested in how the group feels. I realize there is no

> " Right or Wrong, black or White " , I am just interested in how you all

> feel.

>

> Thanks,

> dlc

>

> Foundation: http://www..org

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks!

[Guest guest]

" Happiness is having something to look forward to " .

[Guest guest]

>> " Happiness is having something to look forward to " .

Thats Why I kept you waiting yesterday

The two diets in the studies were called the " low fat " diet and the

" mediterranean " diet.

The data is from the famous Lyon Heart Trial which came out around 98-00

Does knowing this change your answers at all.

Regards

Jeff

[Guest guest]

Agree absolutely!

For me, what works best is reminding myself several times a day to

appreciate the joy of being alive and gratitude for the opportunity to

experience life, and for how fortunate I and my family have been.

The following book, sort of secularizing the philosophies of several

religions into a positive message for the achievement of happiness is

" How to Want What You Have: Discovering the Magic and Grandeur of

Ordinary Existence " by Ray :

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0380726823/104-9361525-2624748

One of my all time favorites.

On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 08:58:45 -0500, Francesca Skelton

<fskelton@...> wrote:

>

>

> Money can't buy happiness: That's not a message you'd expect from an

> economist. But Layard of the London School of Economics dishes it

> out in his new book, " Happiness " (which can be bought, for $25.95). Though

> incomes have doubled over the last half-century, he writes, happiness --

> " just feeling good, " as he defines it -- remains elusive. Why? Layard shared

> some of his thoughts in a phone interview.

>

> What's an economist doing writing about happiness? Economics was really

> invented as a way of examining how economic institutions such as markets,

> taxes and foreign trade would affect the happiness of people. What I'm

> trying to do is to take on board all the psychology of what we can do to

> achieve happiness. Yes, I think if we gave more priority to happiness rather

> than income, the gross domestic product would be less . . . but it's not a

> tragedy if the economy is a bit smaller.

>

> What's keeping us from being happy?

>

> Success in life has become getting highest up the tree. That is what we are

> trying to escape from . . . an individual culture where the chief moral

> obligation is for people to make the most for themselves. Instead, it should

> be creating happiness around you. I'm interested in public policy that

> enables people to live as happy lives as possible. We need a much clearer

> concept of the common good. All kinds of policies would follow from that.

>

> Such as?

>

> Family life is always rated tops in affecting happiness. We ought to be

> making family life easier. Child support should be available to those who

> need it. Parenting should be openly discussed and taught in school, so

> people realize it's a real job. And mental health -- that's the great

> unspoken source of misery in our society. About a third of us will have a

> major mental illness at some time in our lives, and most involve more than

> just the person who is ill. . . . But only 10 percent will see a

> psychiatrist.

>

> What can I do on a personal level to become happy?

>

> One can learn how to separate oneself from negative emotions that seem to

> grip them while focusing on what one can do and appreciate what one has . .

> . I don't meditate, but I am planning to start.

>

> -- Matt McMillen

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jeff:

Quick question:

Which one was the low fat diet? ; ^ )))

==============

I suppose diet A was the Mediterranean. It had more fish

(beneficial) and olive oil (which was less bad than the fats in the

other diet).

No major changes to my guesses.

Rodney.

--- In , " Jeff Novick " <jnovick@p...>

wrote:

> >> " Happiness is having something to look forward to " .

>

> Thats Why I kept you waiting yesterday

>

> The two diets in the studies were called the " low fat " diet and

the " mediterranean " diet.

> The data is from the famous Lyon Heart Trial which came out around

98-00

>

> Does knowing this change your answers at all.

>

> Regards

> Jeff

[Guest guest]

Then why charge $26 for the book?

I like that famous line. I don't do this for the money. I actually give

all my money away to other people, to get stuff I really want.

JR

-----Original Message-----

From: Francesca Skelton [mailto:fskelton@...]

Sent: Friday, February 18, 2005 7:59 AM

support group

Subject: [ ] Happiness

Money can't buy happiness: That's not a message you'd expect from an

economist. But Layard of the London School of Economics dishes it

out in his new book, " Happiness " (which can be bought, for $25.95). Though

incomes have doubled over the last half-century, he writes, happiness --

" just feeling good, " as he defines it -- remains elusive. Why? Layard shared

some of his thoughts in a phone interview.

What's an economist doing writing about happiness? Economics was really

invented as a way of examining how economic institutions such as markets,

taxes and foreign trade would affect the happiness of people. What I'm

trying to do is to take on board all the psychology of what we can do to

achieve happiness. Yes, I think if we gave more priority to happiness rather

than income, the gross domestic product would be less . . . but it's not a

tragedy if the economy is a bit smaller.

What's keeping us from being happy?

Success in life has become getting highest up the tree. That is what we are

trying to escape from . . . an individual culture where the chief moral

obligation is for people to make the most for themselves. Instead, it should

be creating happiness around you. I'm interested in public policy that

enables people to live as happy lives as possible. We need a much clearer

concept of the common good. All kinds of policies would follow from that.

Such as?

Family life is always rated tops in affecting happiness. We ought to be

making family life easier. Child support should be available to those who

need it. Parenting should be openly discussed and taught in school, so

people realize it's a real job. And mental health -- that's the great

unspoken source of misery in our society. About a third of us will have a

major mental illness at some time in our lives, and most involve more than

just the person who is ill. . . . But only 10 percent will see a

psychiatrist.

What can I do on a personal level to become happy?

One can learn how to separate oneself from negative emotions that seem to

grip them while focusing on what one can do and appreciate what one has . .

.. I don't meditate, but I am planning to start.

-- Matt McMillen

[Guest guest]

Money is a pre-requisite to aquire happiness, at least for most folks.

But at about an income of $50K/year, one typically doesn't become

much more happy with increased wealth and income.....

On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 08:48:01 -0600, <crjohnr@...> wrote:

>

> Then why charge $26 for the book?

>

> I like that famous line. I don't do this for the money. I actually give

> all my money away to other people, to get stuff I really want.

>

> JR

>

> -----Original Message-----

> From: Francesca Skelton [mailto:fskelton@...]

> Sent: Friday, February 18, 2005 7:59 AM

> support group

> Subject: [ ] Happiness

>

> Money can't buy happiness: That's not a message you'd expect from an

> economist. But Layard of the London School of Economics dishes it

> out in his new book, " Happiness " (which can be bought, for $25.95). Though

> incomes have doubled over the last half-century, he writes, happiness --

> " just feeling good, " as he defines it -- remains elusive. Why? Layard shared

> some of his thoughts in a phone interview.

>

> What's an economist doing writing about happiness? Economics was really

> invented as a way of examining how economic institutions such as markets,

> taxes and foreign trade would affect the happiness of people. What I'm

> trying to do is to take on board all the psychology of what we can do to

> achieve happiness. Yes, I think if we gave more priority to happiness rather

> than income, the gross domestic product would be less . . . but it's not a

> tragedy if the economy is a bit smaller.

>

> What's keeping us from being happy?

>

> Success in life has become getting highest up the tree. That is what we are

> trying to escape from . . . an individual culture where the chief moral

> obligation is for people to make the most for themselves. Instead, it should

> be creating happiness around you. I'm interested in public policy that

> enables people to live as happy lives as possible. We need a much clearer

> concept of the common good. All kinds of policies would follow from that.

>

> Such as?

>

> Family life is always rated tops in affecting happiness. We ought to be

> making family life easier. Child support should be available to those who

> need it. Parenting should be openly discussed and taught in school, so

> people realize it's a real job. And mental health -- that's the great

> unspoken source of misery in our society. About a third of us will have a

> major mental illness at some time in our lives, and most involve more than

> just the person who is ill. . . . But only 10 percent will see a

> psychiatrist.

>

> What can I do on a personal level to become happy?

>

> One can learn how to separate oneself from negative emotions that seem to

> grip them while focusing on what one can do and appreciate what one has . .

> . I don't meditate, but I am planning to start.

>

> -- Matt McMillen

>

>

[Guest guest]

It's easier to be grateful (one of the secrets of happiness) if you're

living in one of the more advanced countries, have more than enough food to

eat (one of our problems :-)), and a decent roof over your head, and of

course enough money to insure that this will continue.

OTOH, if you're facing a tragedy, or have had one in your life, such as if

you're one of the recent tsunami victims, it's probably a whole lot harder

to be " happy " . That's the trick. To be happy no matter what comes your

way. And sooner or later, almost everyone experiences some disaster or

grief in their life.

I also think some people are born with a higher " happiness " meter than

others.

on 2/18/2005 9:39 AM, Dowling at christopher.a.dowling@...

wrote:

> Agree absolutely!

>

> For me, what works best is reminding myself several times a day to

> appreciate the joy of being alive and gratitude for the opportunity to

> experience life, and for how fortunate I and my family have been.

>

> The following book, sort of secularizing the philosophies of several

> religions into a positive message for the achievement of happiness is

> " How to Want What You Have: Discovering the Magic and Grandeur of

> Ordinary Existence " by Ray :

>

> http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0380726823/104-9361525-2624748

>

> One of my all time favorites.

>

[Guest guest]

" Ah bin rich, and ah bin poor, and believe me, rich is better " .

[Guest guest]

True, Francesca!

Studies show that people remain at a " baseline " happiness fairly

independently of external events. Kind of a happiness " set-point. "

But this can be manipulated a bit, I think (optimists also live

longer!)

On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 09:57:57 -0500, Francesca Skelton

<fskelton@...> wrote:

>

> It's easier to be grateful (one of the secrets of happiness) if you're

> living in one of the more advanced countries, have more than enough food to

> eat (one of our problems :-)), and a decent roof over your head, and of

> course enough money to insure that this will continue.

>

> OTOH, if you're facing a tragedy, or have had one in your life, such as if

> you're one of the recent tsunami victims, it's probably a whole lot harder

> to be " happy " . That's the trick. To be happy no matter what comes your

> way. And sooner or later, almost everyone experiences some disaster or

> grief in their life.

>

> I also think some people are born with a higher " happiness " meter than

> others.

>

> on 2/18/2005 9:39 AM, Dowling at christopher.a.dowling@...

> wrote:

>

> > Agree absolutely!

> >

> > For me, what works best is reminding myself several times a day to

> > appreciate the joy of being alive and gratitude for the opportunity to

> > experience life, and for how fortunate I and my family have been.

> >

> > The following book, sort of secularizing the philosophies of several

> > religions into a positive message for the achievement of happiness is

> > " How to Want What You Have: Discovering the Magic and Grandeur of

> > Ordinary Existence " by Ray :

> >

> > http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0380726823/104-9361525-2624748

> >

> > One of my all time favorites.

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Can't argue wit dat!

On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 15:09:53 -0000, Rodney <perspect1111@...> wrote:

>

>

> " Ah bin rich, and ah bin poor, and believe me, rich is better " .

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I can! Have you ever really thought about the lives of some of the

fabulously rich? At times more than their share of tragedy and death

(think of the Kennedy's), alcoholism and drug use (take a look at some

entertainment and sport stars), and divorce is certainly a biggie. (For

those of you who have never gone through a divorce, it sucks big time).

Take just one person who was famous and rich, and beautiful to boot: Jackie

Kennedy Onassis. Her marriage to the late President wasn't a happy one;

then it ended in a most tragic way. Followed by a second unsuccessful

marriage to someone who was one of the richest men in the world. And then

illness which killed her in her early 60's. If she had lived she would have

suffered the loss of her son, who crashed his plane.

A story ran here recently about a lottery winner who won many millions a few

years ago and how it had ruined his life. His grandaughter turned to drugs

(now that she had the money to purchase them) and died from an overdose, his

marriage failed, and his friends were all looking for handouts.

I can think of many others whose lives followed tragic patterns. So money's

not the answer - although enough surely helps. As noted, you need a

base amount to insure the necessities. Also so they say (I wouldn't know),

if you have it, the happiness " wears off " ...........

on 2/18/2005 10:24 AM, Dowling at

christopher.a.dowling@... wrote:

> Can't argue wit dat!

>

>

> On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 15:09:53 -0000, Rodney <perspect1111@...> wrote:

>>

>>

>> " Ah bin rich, and ah bin poor, and believe me, rich is better " .

>>

>>

[Guest guest]

" Happiness is all in yer head " .

[Guest guest]

Because of where I work, many of my patients are the " rich and famous "

and are in the top 5-10% of the world in regard to income.

Not only are they not any happier, many of them are miserable.

Money doesn't equal happiness.

Jeff

[Guest guest]

Hi Jeff:

Agreed. But wouldn't these people be even more miserable if they

lost their wealth/income?

Rodney.

--- In , " Jeff Novick " <jnovick@p...>

wrote:

> Because of where I work, many of my patients are the " rich and

famous "

> and are in the top 5-10% of the world in regard to income.

>

> Not only are they not any happier, many of them are miserable.

>

> Money doesn't equal happiness.

>

> Jeff

[Guest guest]

>>But wouldn't these people be even more miserable if they lost their

wealth/income?

Maybe. One thing they always tell me is that the money eliminates many

problems/worries but doesn't buy happiness.

For me, the more I simplify my life, the better it is and happier I am

Jeff

[Guest guest]

When you grow up poor you don't have the expectations of a rich person, like you don't expect to be president even though you're stupid. So rich people feel failure more, I think, at least they get more time to think about it.

I never had much time to think about it, because I was always working, and finding more work. Feeding the family was the big drive.

I don't have the desire to steal a million dollars because I learned to live on a whole lot less, yet people who are very wealthy will often manipulate whatever to get even more than they have or will ever need. So in their case, more wealth doesn't satisfy them. A 6 million $ apartment in NY has to be modified with a 30 Million $ refurb.

I drive a pickup and an old van mainly because the guy driving the Mercedes has to get out of the way.

More importantly, I have a gson that will graduate med school at age 22 like his uncle. So happiness is where you find it.

Regards.

----- Original Message -----

From: Rodney

Sent: Friday, February 18, 2005 9:09 AM

Subject: [ ] Re: Happiness

"Ah bin rich, and ah bin poor, and believe me, rich is better".