a friend who responds to CFS with anger

[Guest guest]

After reading that many of you have experienced the same " backing away " from

friends, I want to share this story:

I received a letter (below) from a long-time friend who has wanted me to come

visit her far away. She says a visit will offer me rest and time away from

stress. I been consumed with selling a house, moving little by little, &

finding disabilty housing. I'm still moving & do not yet have a place to live.

For the most part, I am bed-ridden. I do not have a support group or a doctor

who can treat me.

I find it unbearable to travel, whether to the grocery store or across the

country. I told my friend that a trip could be very hard on me. I might end up

spending our visiting time in bed recouperating from the travel. I haven't ruled

out going to visit but until I have settled in my new lodgings and found social

services, I can't go anywhere, yet.

The words in her letter were painful to read. I feel judged and accused. I've

been struggling with a way to respond to this letter. I've sent articles to this

friend about CFS/Fibro, a DVD, my own descriptions, etc. She is an occupational

therapist. I don't understand what it is that she wants me to do. Can someone

help me with words to respond?

Here is the letter:

" I think of you everyday. I HOPE YOU HAVE A TRUE SUPPORT NETWORK IN YOUR AREA.

Because you know I can do nothing for you from so far away. Your last letter

made it sound that (a trip to or moving to?) Chicago was not an option.

Also- your control issues also make it impossible to assist you. I love you and

hate that you are so

stubborn and lost. I am totally competent to assist you in life transitions

(but not medically and therapeutically) if you can trust me. "