Iris

[Guest guest]

Iris,

I’m sorry you are in so much pain this week. It’s good that your doctor is

taking this seriously.

Let us know what he says.

It’s wonderful that your husband is enjoying his job so much, it must be

such a relief. Men in particular are very difficult to live with when they

are unemployed or unhappy in their jobs.

Unfortunately there is no magic pill that I know of for your daughter, it

takes love, time and hard work. It’s very important that she realizes that

she has a problem and makes a commitment to try and do something about it.

I was helped by intensive counseling (once a week for 2 years), lots of love

and acceptance from my husband (it took us to another level in our

relationship very young) and also the right medication (I can’t remember the

name of the antidepressants but it was a seratonin replacement).

She needs a good therapist that she can trust and feel comfortable with.

It’s very important to respect that her therapy sessions are her own and

private. As her mother you might be tempted to ask the therapist how she is

doing but she might want to bring up issues from home and be scared you

would find out, this blocks the therapy. Once she’s been going a while just

let her know you would be prepared to go with her once or twice if she feels

that it would help.

It is very very hard but worth every second, I had a lot of issues to deal

with in therapy and know I would be a completely different person today if I

hadn’t gone, and not a very agreeable person at that. People with

aggressive depression will lash out and hurt those around them when all they

really want is for them to put their arms around them and love them how they

are. For example I would forever shout at my husband (then boyfriend) and

tell him to leave, it was my biggest fear really and I was creating a

self-fulfilling prophecy. You need others but push them away, often because

you are terrified they’ll leave etc. it goes around and around.

It’s not the kind of depression that makes people feel sorry for you and

cuddle you. It’s awful for the family but worse for the person who has it,

they are in constant internal turmoil.

I hope that she is able to get through this and emerge a happier person. If

ever you want to e-mail me privately about this, please don’t hesitate. I

seemed to have missed why she needs to go to court but I will pray that it

works out well.

You are both in my prayers.

(((((((((Big hugs)))))))))))

Heidi

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[Guest guest]

Thanks Iris, I had almost given up thinking I could have anything treatable! I

am feeling a little better, less muscle pain, less fatigue. Guess it'll take a

little longer for the rest, but I can't complain, I'll take any improvement I

can get!

Iris Nosker wrote: Dear Debbie...It is so wonderful that you have a

diagnosis of Lyme Disease so your dr can start you

with the proper treatment. I hope you will be

improving in the near future. Iris

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