Guest guest Posted September 7, 2002 Report Share Posted September 7, 2002 >You live in California when .... >1.You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house. >2.The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone. >3.The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway. >4.You know how to eat an artichoke. >5.You drive to your neighborhood block party. >6.Someone asks you how far away something is, you tell them how long it >will >take > to get there rather than how many miles away it is. > > > >You live in New York when . . >1.You say " the city " and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan. >2.You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State >Building. >3.You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus >Circle >to > Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map. >4.You think Central Park is " nature. " >5.You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language >makes >you > multi-lingual. >6.You've worn out a car horn. >7.You think eye contact is an act of aggression. > >You live in Alaska (or Yellowknife) when . . .. >1.You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup and Tabasco. >2.Halloween costumes fit over parkas. >3.You have more than one recipe for moose. >4.Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons. >5.The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and >construction. > >You live in the Deep South when . . . >1.You get a movie and bait in the same store. >2. " Ya'll " is singular and " all ya'll " is plural. >3.After fifteen years you still hear, " You ain't from 'round here, are ya? " >4. " He needed killin' " is a valid defense. >5.Everyone has 2 first names. > >You live in Colorado when . . . >1.You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car. >2.You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home, and he stops at >the > Day Care Center. >3.A pass does not involve a football or dating. >4.The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail. > >You live in the Midwest when . . . >1.You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name. >2.Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor. >3.You have had to switch from " heat " to " A/C " on the same day. >4.You end sentences with a preposition: " Where's my coat at? " >5.When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, " It was >different! " > >You live in Florida when... >1.You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon. >2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars. >3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist. >4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state. >5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people. Kathi in OK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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