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S. Mathews wrote:

> Dear friends,

> I guess I should have done this from the beginning, but was never

> compelled to introduce myself until now. I am 39 years old, have 3

> daughters (20, 16, 14) and 2 grandchildren (4 and 2). I am getting

> married November 8 in the Chapel of Memories on the Mississippi State

> University campus to the most wonderful man in the whole wide world. My

> birthday is November 7 and his is November 9. It only made sense to get

> married on the only day left in between.

> I was adopted at the age of 6 months 3 weeks and weighed a little

> over 13 lb.. At birth, I only weighed 5 lb.. 2 oz. and was thought to

> be 2 months early. I was born with mitral valve prolapse and had to go

> to Labohner Hospital in Memphis until I was 9 years old to have my heart

> checked.

> Growing up was never easy, because I knew that I was so very

> different from everyone else around me; plus, all my problems was blamed

> on being adopted. My parents, if anything, loved me too much and

> would've breathed for me if they could. They were either too strict or

> too lenient; there was no middle ground as far as discipline. My first

> " true love " came into my life when I was 13 years old and didn't end

> until I was 16 years old. I graduated high school at 16 and found

> another " true love " to whom I married in 1977 at the age of 18. I got

> pregnant on our honeymoon and delivered 10 months later. We were

> divorced in 1979 and I went into the Air Force.

> While in the Air Force, I met and married my second husband. We

> were divorced 10 months later as we could not be stationed together and

> could not live as man and wife for four years. When I arove at my

> permanent base at -Patt

> Ohio, I met and married my third husband. We were married for 17 years.

>

> Husband #3 was the most manipulating and controlling man anyone

> could ever want to meet. Upon trying to get pregnant, we discovered

> that both fallopian tubes were completely blocked, making pregnancy

> impossible. But by the grace of God, we had two daughters and this is

> when most of my problems began. During the birth of my second daughter,

> I had to have an emergency C-Section. Her heart beat kept dropping

> drastically as she was in footling breech presentation. She weighed 5

> lb. 1 oz. and weighed 4 lb.. 13 oz. the day we brought her home.

> During birth #3, more complications arose. I had placenta percretia

> and placenta acretia. The baby was the only thing in my uterus and the

> placenta escaped into the abdominal cavity; growing into my bladder in

> three places. I wore an external bladder catheter for 6 weeks, not

> knowing if I would have it for the rest of my life or not. I had 12

> units of blood, as the doctors cut through the major arteries to my

> uterus (first death experience).

> Nine months later, I had a partial hysterectomy (supposedly). Six

> years after the " hysterectomy " , I started having lower abdominal pain

> that was similar to appendicitis. After a CAT scan, it was discovered

> that my left ovary was growing around the ureter to my left kidney.

> During emergency surgery, the surgeon discovered that the fat layer on

> my right side had been stuffed back in and was growing to my bladder and

> small intestines. The uterus was still there minus the fundus. My

> lungs quit exchanging oxygen and I was on a respirator for 24 hours

> (second death experience).

> At this point, I started having severe allergies. Most of which

> were medications primarily for pain. I went to several specialists who

> told me that most of this was psychological and I needed to get on with

> my life. Since then, I've had 2 carpal tunnel surgeries on the right

> hand, 1 carpal tunnel on the left, rhinoplasty for polyps and a deviated

> septum, tarsal tunnel on the right ankle, arthroscopy on the right knee,

> and emergency oral surgery for an abscessed tooth.

> In December 1995, I left husband #3 to help my adopted mother care

> for my father's mother, who suffered from Alzheimer's. At that time, I

> had my two younger daughters and my granddaughter. In June 1996, my

> grandmother passed away and husband #3 took my kids with the promise to

> bring them back in time for school.

> July 1, 1996, my mother's only sister passed away and her youngest

> brother passed away 18 days later.

> In May 1996, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (manic

> depression) and was put on medication to alleviate the depression. I

> have more depressive episodes than I do manic ones. In August 1996, I

> went back to school at a local community college and graduated in May

> 1997. After graduation, I started summer school at Mississippi State

> University. During the summer, I ran into the man I had only dreamed of

> as a child. He was in a wheel chair and was the hairiest man I'd ever

> seen, but I knew I was in love the first time I laid eyes on him.

> However, I didn't pursue him until later. I ran into him three more

> times before we had our first date. He is getting his Ph.D. in American

> History. He has Friedreich's Ataxia and has been in a wheel chair since

> he was 17. He is now 33 years old.

> Our romance has been a fairy tale come true. I never knew that

> unconditional love could be so great. He accepts me for who I am and

> what I believe in; no questions asked. When I reach out to him, he

> reaches back, with arms open wide. The depression in the past had

> clouded my judgment on the men that I had married, because the others

> were abusers. This time it's real. We can talk for hours and it only

> seems like minutes. The subject of our conversations are about anything

> and everything, but we talk. He is loving, caring, compassionate,

> understanding, gentle, loving, and warm; everything a woman could ever

> want in a companion for life.

> In January 1998, I became ill with a viral infection that had me in

> bed for 4 weeks. I had to withdraw from the Spring semester at school

> and I've been continually getting worse. Not only do I have the 18

> tender spots, but everything in between. I have more really bad days

> than even close to good days. My pain threshold is almost zilch and

> it's always in my right side. Both sides are affected, but the doctor

> says my right is more painful due to all the surgeries that I've had on

> that side. I stay exhausted constantly and even with all the

> medications that I take, I'm lucky to sleep 4 out of 24. I'm on

> trazodone 150 mg/day, elavil 20 mg/day, premarin 0.0625 mg/day, lodine

> 600 mg/day, lipitor 20 mg/day and melatonin 3 mg/day. I am going to a

> specialist is on May 6. I will have a biopsy done on the

> butterflies on my cheeks to check for Lupus.

> I have filed for Social Security as I am no longer able to work. He

> is on Social Security already for the FA. Together, we have no income

> and we bought a mobile home in November 1997. The strange part is that

> his mother has FMS, also.

> We have each other and are very happy together. I never knew I

> could be happy, partly because I never thought that I deserved to be

> happy. Sorry, this has been so long but I really wanted everyone to

> know what my life has been like from the past to the present.

> Our wedding theme is " Fairy Tales do come true " . Believe me, this

> is going to be one fairy tale that has a happy ending, no matter what.

> Thanks for listening and remember that I will keep ya'll in my thoughts

> and prayers.

>

> -

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Date: Tue, 21 Apr 1998 02:54:22 -0500

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To: FIBROM-L Fibromyalgia Discussion Group

Subject: CHAT: Introduction

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Dear friends,

I guess I should have done this from the beginning, but was never

compelled to introduce myself until now. I am 39 years old, have 3

daughters (20, 16, 14) and 2 grandchildren (4 and 2). I am getting

married November 8 in the Chapel of Memories on the Mississippi State

University campus to the most wonderful man in the whole wide world. My

birthday is November 7 and his is November 9. It only made sense to get

married on the only day left in between.

I was adopted at the age of 6 months 3 weeks and weighed a little

over 13 lb.. At birth, I only weighed 5 lb.. 2 oz. and was thought to

be 2 months early. I was born with mitral valve prolapse and had to go

to Labohner Hospital in Memphis until I was 9 years old to have my heart

checked.

Growing up was never easy, because I knew that I was so very

different from everyone else around me; plus, all my problems was blamed

on being adopted. My parents, if anything, loved me too much and

would've breathed for me if they could. They were either too strict or

too lenient; there was no middle ground as far as discipline. My first

" true love " came into my life when I was 13 years old and didn't end

until I was 16 years old. I graduated high school at 16 and found

another " true love " to whom I married in 1977 at the age of 18. I got

pregnant on our honeymoon and delivered 10 months later. We were

divorced in 1979 and I went into the Air Force.

While in the Air Force, I met and married my second husband. We

were divorced 10 months later as we could not be stationed together and

could not live as man and wife for four years. When I arove at my

permanent base at -Patt

Ohio, I met and married my third husband. We were married for 17 years.

Husband #3 was the most manipulating and controlling man anyone

could ever want to meet. Upon trying to get pregnant, we discovered

that both fallopian tubes were completely blocked, making pregnancy

impossible. But by the grace of God, we had two daughters and this is

when most of my problems began. During the birth of my second daughter,

I had to have an emergency C-Section. Her heart beat kept dropping

drastically as she was in footling breech presentation. She weighed 5

lb. 1 oz. and weighed 4 lb.. 13 oz. the day we brought her home.

During birth #3, more complications arose. I had placenta percretia

and placenta acretia. The baby was the only thing in my uterus and the

placenta escaped into the abdominal cavity; growing into my bladder in

three places. I wore an external bladder catheter for 6 weeks, not

knowing if I would have it for the rest of my life or not. I had 12

units of blood, as the doctors cut through the major arteries to my

uterus (first death experience).

Nine months later, I had a partial hysterectomy (supposedly). Six

years after the " hysterectomy " , I started having lower abdominal pain

that was similar to appendicitis. After a CAT scan, it was discovered

that my left ovary was growing around the ureter to my left kidney.

During emergency surgery, the surgeon discovered that the fat layer on

my right side had been stuffed back in and was growing to my bladder and

small intestines. The uterus was still there minus the fundus. My

lungs quit exchanging oxygen and I was on a respirator for 24 hours

(second death experience).

At this point, I started having severe allergies. Most of which

were medications primarily for pain. I went to several specialists who

told me that most of this was psychological and I needed to get on with

my life. Since then, I've had 2 carpal tunnel surgeries on the right

hand, 1 carpal tunnel on the left, rhinoplasty for polyps and a deviated

septum, tarsal tunnel on the right ankle, arthroscopy on the right knee,

and emergency oral surgery for an abscessed tooth.

In December 1995, I left husband #3 to help my adopted mother care

for my father's mother, who suffered from Alzheimer's. At that time, I

had my two younger daughters and my granddaughter. In June 1996, my

grandmother passed away and husband #3 took my kids with the promise to

bring them back in time for school.

July 1, 1996, my mother's only sister passed away and her youngest

brother passed away 18 days later.

In May 1996, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (manic

depression) and was put on medication to alleviate the depression. I

have more depressive episodes than I do manic ones. In August 1996, I

went back to school at a local community college and graduated in May

1997. After graduation, I started summer school at Mississippi State

University. During the summer, I ran into the man I had only dreamed of

as a child. He was in a wheel chair and was the hairiest man I'd ever

seen, but I knew I was in love the first time I laid eyes on him.

However, I didn't pursue him until later. I ran into him three more

times before we had our first date. He is getting his Ph.D. in American

History. He has Friedreich's Ataxia and has been in a wheel chair since

he was 17. He is now 33 years old.

Our romance has been a fairy tale come true. I never knew that

unconditional love could be so great. He accepts me for who I am and

what I believe in; no questions asked. When I reach out to him, he

reaches back, with arms open wide. The depression in the past had

clouded my judgment on the men that I had married, because the others

were abusers. This time it's real. We can talk for hours and it only

seems like minutes. The subject of our conversations are about anything

and everything, but we talk. He is loving, caring, compassionate,

understanding, gentle, loving, and warm; everything a woman could ever

want in a companion for life.

In January 1998, I became ill with a viral infection that had me in

bed for 4 weeks. I had to withdraw from the Spring semester at school

and I've been continually getting worse. Not only do I have the 18

tender spots, but everything in between. I have more really bad days

than even close to good days. My pain threshold is almost zilch and

it's always in my right side. Both sides are affected, but the doctor

says my right is more painful due to all the surgeries that I've had on

that side. I stay exhausted constantly and even with all the

medications that I take, I'm lucky to sleep 4 out of 24. I'm on

trazodone 150 mg/day, elavil 20 mg/day, premarin 0.0625 mg/day, lodine

600 mg/day, lipitor 20 mg/day and melatonin 3 mg/day. I am going to a

specialist is on May 6. I will have a biopsy done on the

butterflies on my cheeks to check for Lupus.

I have filed for Social Security as I am no longer able to work. He

is on Social Security already for the FA. Together, we have no income

and we bought a mobile home in November 1997. The strange part is that

his mother has FMS, also.

We have each other and are very happy together. I never knew I

could be happy, partly because I never thought that I deserved to be

happy. Sorry, this has been so long but I really wanted everyone to

know what my life has been like from the past to the present.

Our wedding theme is " Fairy Tales do come true " . Believe me, this

is going to be one fairy tale that has a happy ending, no matter what.

Thanks for listening and remember that I will keep ya'll in my thoughts

and prayers.

-

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