ticking sounds

[Guest guest]

I wanted to vent about ticking sounds which were not only my first

trigger sound but continue to be my worst. Last weekend my best

friend and her new boyfriend came to visit us from out of state. He

fixes clocks. He gave a beautiful old-fashioned mantel clock.

It's beautiful, and and I both love the chiming it does on

every hour and every half hour. But the ticking is so loud! It's

making me crazy!!!

After they left I asked my

boyfriend to move it from our living room mantel to a different

room. I didn't want to do this as its lovely and I know he loves the

visual of the clock as much as I do. I suggested we just use it as a

visual and remove the weight so it stops ticking, but he said it

would be hard to get it back again if we ever wanted to get it

working again so he just moved it. Bummer.

I feel so wretched about this, such a waste of life that I can't even

summon the maturity or tolerance to let my darling man enjoy this

lovely gift. It's so unfair to him and makes me feel like such a low

life that I had to ask him to remove such a lovely gift from that

place of honor. But ticking is like the worst hell for me and has

been since I was in my late teens. It's like a million tiny knives

being thrown into my skull. I sometimes think it's because I'm

musical and can't ignore the rhythmn and other times I think it's

because, subconsciously, it reminds me of my life ticking and winding

down, time running out, etc. But I think it's mainly just because I

f'ing HATE THE SOUND OF TICKING!!!

When I first broached the subject, about to go mad from the ticking,

my boyfriend was very sweet and moved it to the upstairs bedroom and

said he wondered how I was going to deal with it and didn't mind at

all. But then I could still hear it down the hall and from every

other room upstairs including my office and the bathroom (goodbye

relaxing hot baths!) and I told him this. He then became frustrated

and visibly angry, and said (sarcastically), " Fine then. I'll just

box it up... " or something to that effect. I felt bad and told him

not to and that I'd try and deal with it for a few days, but it

wasn't likely to get any better. Ugh.

I loved that " it's all in your head " commentary that was posted

recently. I hope I live to see the day that the brain and all of its

functions (including cognitive and emotions) are accepted as any

other organ in the body, without stigma. I'm afraid that is a long

way off...