Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones with the problem...?

[Guest guest]

I agree. I have talked to people about my condition. I'll point

something out that I'm totally aware of and they won't be until I point

it out to them. Like you said, they find it gross, annoying or

offensive, but can easily tolerate it. Whereas I'm physically feeling

affects from it as intolerable... etc.

wrote:

>

>

> I " taught " this to a couple friends of mine, but from what I've seen

> their reactions are different. They still notice the sounds more than is

> average, and they find them gross or offensive, but they don't seem to

> have the uncontrollable rage or physical symptoms that I do. I think

> it's possible to learn the awareness, but the metal part that puts us

> constantly into a hyperalert state isn't something that's contagious.

> Just my opinion, though.

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> To: Soundsensitivity

> From: kmountis@...

> Date: Fri, 18 Jul 2008 12:55:50 -0700

> Subject: RE: Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

> My sister and I both have it but I always thought I had TAUGHT it to

> her…. I was always telling her gross the noises were, etc? She also has

> friends now who have it and they blame her for giving it to them> Who

> knows….

>

>

>

> *From:* Soundsensitivity

> [mailto:Soundsensitivity ] *On Behalf Of *Kathy Howe

> *Sent:* Friday, July 18, 2008 8:36 AM

> *To:* Soundsensitivity

> *Subject:* RE: Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

>

>

> Another case for the genetic factor:

>

>

>

> There was someone early on--a couple of years ago--on this site who said

> that he and all his siblings had this condition. I guess you could

> argue that they all " learned " it from something in their evironment, but

> I would say that both his parents probably had the dominant gene for 4s

> and therefore all their kids--I think it was 5 or 6 kids--got it. They

> would be a great case to study!

>

>

>

> Also, there are a couple of sets of identical twins on this site who

> both have it. Once again, you could argue that they had the same

> environmental exposures, but I would argue that they have the exact same

> genes. Another great case to study!

>

>

>

> Oh what I would do to have a lot of resources to be able to study this

> crazy condition in a laboratory instead of just on this website!! I

> would do MRIs, CTs, anything I could to see what could be causing this.

> I think it would be fascinating to do an MRI or CT while the person is

> exposed to gum chewing. And especially gum chewing from their worst

> trigger person!

>

>

>

> Oh well--just a fantasy.

>

>

>

> Kathy

>

> * Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

> " Or it's just the sense of being trapped like an animal, with fight-or-

> flight instincts racing and nowhere to go. "

>

> Exactly--my 4s reaction is SO much worse if I know I'm stuck

> somewhere.

>

> " Why do you conclude that a familial trait is genetic and not learned?

> Where do you think people learn to be considerate or to be an

> obnoxious slob? At home, from the family. "

>

> I recently learned that my uncle, who died when I was 13, had 4s,

> and I had no idea before. This doesn't prove a genetic link, of

> course, but I certainly didn't learn it from him, or from anyone

> else in my family, since we were the only lucky two (I'm pretty

> sure.) There's been no research, only stories shared by the group,

> but there does seem to be a genetic factor involved.

>

> I think you have a point about it not being totally our problem.

> Manners have gone downhill fast in the past couple of generations.

> But I'm annoyed by so many things that aren't manners-related:

> traffic, barking dogs (although good mannered-owners should keep

> their dogs happy), anything repetitive like clicking or popping.

> Even if these sounds are made by machines, they bug me. And we

> can't deny that most people just don't care about these little

> noises. Even if they're a bit annoyed, they don't have the extreme

> reaction--so basically the problem is ours, unfortunately.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Keep your kids safer online with Windows Live Family Safety. Help

> protect your kids.

>

<http://www.windowslive.com/family_safety/overview.html?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_family\

_safety_072008>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kathy, you are lucky to be able to block out an obnoxious gum chewer

when you need to. I can't, I've tried, it is like the obnoxious gum

chewer hijacks my entire being and won't let go.

Kathy Howe wrote:

>

>

> I totally agree. I am so very aware of all disgusting and soft sounds

> that bother my daughter since she got it. They annoy me only because I

> know these sounds torture my daughter. I do not and can not get the

> same feeling that you all get. I think your friends are empathyzing

> with you, but they don't have to run away and break down when they are

> subjected to gum chewing.

>

> I can hear a really obnoxious gum chewer, but then easily block them out

> if I need to.

>

> Kathy

>

> * Re: Ever think we are *not* the

> ones with the problem...?

>

> " Or it's just the sense of being trapped like an animal, with

> fight-or-

> flight instincts racing and nowhere to go. "

>

> Exactly--my 4s reaction is SO much worse if I know I'm stuck

> somewhere.

>

> " Why do you conclude that a familial trait is genetic and not

> learned?

> Where do you think people learn to be considerate or to be an

> obnoxious slob? At home, from the family. "

>

> I recently learned that my uncle, who died when I was 13, had

> 4s, and I had no idea before. This doesn't prove a genetic

> link, of course, but I certainly didn't learn it from him, or

> from anyone else in my family, since we were the only lucky two

> (I'm pretty sure.) There's been no research, only stories

> shared by the group, but there does seem to be a genetic factor

> involved.

>

> I think you have a point about it not being totally our

> problem. Manners have gone downhill fast in the past couple of

> generations. But I'm annoyed by so many things that aren't

> manners-related: traffic, barking dogs (although good

> mannered-owners should keep their dogs happy), anything

> repetitive like clicking or popping. Even if these sounds are

> made by machines, they bug me. And we can't deny that most

> people just don't care about these little noises. Even if

> they're a bit annoyed, they don't have the extreme reaction--so

> basically the problem is ours, unfortunately.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Keep your kids safer online with Windows Live Family Safety. Help

> protect your kids.

>

<http://www.windowslive.com/family_safety/overview.html?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_family\

_safety_072008>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Kim, I'm 31 and started participating in the group recently as well.

So, welcome to the group! I know what it is like to suffer from this

condition for as long as you have. It has been like one big hurdle in my

life and I haven't been able to jump over yet. I keep slamming into a

brick wall head first full force instead. I feel what you are going

through. And I'm sorry you have to endure it. It can be a scary lonely

place. I know, Randall

kim wrote:

>

>

> EXACTLY!!!!! None are as bad as me. God, it is so amazing to have found

> all of u after 32 years of suffering alone

>

>

>

> *From:* Soundsensitivity

> [mailto:Soundsensitivity ] *On Behalf Of *

> *Sent:* Friday, July 18, 2008 1:11 PM

> *To:* soundsensitivity

> *Subject:* RE: Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

>

>

> I " taught " this to a couple friends of mine, but from what I've seen

> their reactions are different. They still notice the sounds more than is

> average, and they find them gross or offensive, but they don't seem to

> have the uncontrollable rage or physical symptoms that I do. I think

> it's possible to learn the awareness, but the metal part that puts us

> constantly into a hyperalert state isn't something that's contagious.

> Just my opinion, though.

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> To: Soundsensitivity

> From: kmountis@...

> Date: Fri, 18 Jul 2008 12:55:50 -0700

> Subject: RE: Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

> My sister and I both have it but I always thought I had TAUGHT it to

> her…. I was always telling her gross the noises were, etc? She also has

> friends now who have it and they blame her for giving it to them> Who

> knows….

>

>

>

> *From:* Soundsensitivity

> [mailto:Soundsensitivity ] *On Behalf Of *Kathy Howe

> *Sent:* Friday, July 18, 2008 8:36 AM

> *To:* Soundsensitivity

> *Subject:* RE: Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

>

>

> Another case for the genetic factor:

>

>

>

> There was someone early on--a couple of years ago--on this site who said

> that he and all his siblings had this condition. I guess you could

> argue that they all " learned " it from something in their evironment, but

> I would say that both his parents probably had the dominant gene for 4s

> and therefore all their kids--I think it was 5 or 6 kids--got it. They

> would be a great case to study!

>

>

>

> Also, there are a couple of sets of identical twins on this site who

> both have it. Once again, you could argue that they had the same

> environmental exposures, but I would argue that they have the exact same

> genes. Another great case to study!

>

>

>

> Oh what I would do to have a lot of resources to be able to study this

> crazy condition in a laboratory instead of just on this website!! I

> would do MRIs, CTs, anything I could to see what could be causing this.

> I think it would be fascinating to do an MRI or CT while the person is

> exposed to gum chewing. And especially gum chewing from their worst

> trigger person!

>

>

>

> Oh well--just a fantasy.

>

>

>

> Kathy

>

> * Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones

> with the problem...?

>

> " Or it's just the sense of being trapped like an animal, with fight-or-

> flight instincts racing and nowhere to go. "

>

> Exactly--my 4s reaction is SO much worse if I know I'm stuck

> somewhere.

>

> " Why do you conclude that a familial trait is genetic and not learned?

> Where do you think people learn to be considerate or to be an

> obnoxious slob? At home, from the family. "

>

> I recently learned that my uncle, who died when I was 13, had 4s,

> and I had no idea before. This doesn't prove a genetic link, of

> course, but I certainly didn't learn it from him, or from anyone

> else in my family, since we were the only lucky two (I'm pretty

> sure.) There's been no research, only stories shared by the group,

> but there does seem to be a genetic factor involved.

>

> I think you have a point about it not being totally our problem.

> Manners have gone downhill fast in the past couple of generations.

> But I'm annoyed by so many things that aren't manners-related:

> traffic, barking dogs (although good mannered-owners should keep

> their dogs happy), anything repetitive like clicking or popping.

> Even if these sounds are made by machines, they bug me. And we

> can't deny that most people just don't care about these little

> noises. Even if they're a bit annoyed, they don't have the extreme

> reaction--so basically the problem is ours, unfortunately.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

>

> Keep your kids safer online with Windows Live Family Safety. Help

> protect your kids.

>

<http://www.windowslive.com/family_safety/overview.html?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_family\

_safety_072008>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Darn it! My mother just came to me started talking and was chewing gum

at the same time!!! I hate how I feel inside from being exposed to that!

She knows what it does to me, but seems to always forget!!!

I was right in the middle of concentrating and now I have to deal with

the ugly feelings I have inside! So ve3ry frustrating!@!@!

[Guest guest]

That is the most difficult part of this condition to deal with. It is

very tiring to go from feeling fine to feeling rage in just a matter of

seconds.

I was never allowed to show feelings of rage or frustration of that kind

growing up. I had to always hide it and internalize it and try to appear

happy. And that is like working a full time job in one day every day.

Not very healthy and exhausting to boot!!!

That is why I keep to myself most of the time. As a matter of survival.

I tend to have higher blood pressure naturally, and going through that

all the time just makes it worse.

I still don't know how society expects someone to be able to live a

" normal " life and do all the " normal " things required of them, like

working, providing for oneself and having a family etc., when dealing

with something like that all the time.

It is not good on the human body to be stressed out 24/7 and never have

a chance to recoup.

Darlene wrote:

>

>

> Hi Randall,

>

> Isn't it crazy how quickly our bodies can go from feeling fine to

> feeling rage in just a matter of seconds? You are right... it's so

> frustrating! I completely relate!

>

> Darlene

>

>

> >

> > Darn it! My mother just came to me started talking and was chewing

> gum

> > at the same time!!! I hate how I feel inside from being exposed to

> that!

> > She knows what it does to me, but seems to always forget!!!

> >

> > I was right in the middle of concentrating and now I have to deal

> with

> > the ugly feelings I have inside! So ve3ry frustrating!@!@!

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

I agree about how exhausting it is. When I first open my eyes in the

morning I'm already dreading the day to come. By the end of the day

I feel like a limp, rag doll that's been chewed up and spit out by a

pitbull. Most people who get stressed out in life can just take a

vacation to recoup but not us... there is no such place. Except

maybe all alone atop the highest mountain with nothing but the

wind... as long as wind isn't a trigger!

Darlene

> > >

> > > Darn it! My mother just came to me started talking and was

chewing

> > gum

> > > at the same time!!! I hate how I feel inside from being

exposed to

> > that!

> > > She knows what it does to me, but seems to always forget!!!

> > >

> > > I was right in the middle of concentrating and now I have to

deal

> > with

> > > the ugly feelings I have inside! So ve3ry frustrating!@!@!

> > >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

no, i have never thought that and that's because it's not just rude obnoxious noises such as smacking and bubble gum chewing that annoy me. Some of us go crazy at certain letters and the way some people say them. It's the way people friggin talk and talking should not be bothersome, but it is. So, there has to be a problem with us.

Now don't get me wrong. I know chewing and smacking can drive you nuts, but i also think it's possible that some people just pay too much attention to it and THINK they might have 4s. But I do know that some people can't remember not being annoyed by such things and really do have 4s. I'm just saying, if you are out there and you THINK you have 4s, you don't and trust me you would know. You don't need help. Sounds harsh, but I just don't like phonys.

Ever think we are *not* the ones with the problem...?

I found this group recently through a fluke mention of SSSS on a weblog, and was relieved to learn that I was not alone in being disgusted and enraged by other people's offensive habits and lack of courtesy.But I'm a little disturbed to learn that people are looking at undergoing medical studies and taking cocktails of medication to cope with the problem.What kind of medication do you suppose would help obnoxious, oblivious people develop a reasonable sensitivity to gross bodily noises and rude behavior? What kind of clinical study would help office workers realize that squishing and popping a wad of gum for 8 hours in a room full of people is no more acceptable than playing rap music on a boombox?I've already quit going to movie theaters because some genius decided loud crunchy junk food was the perfect complement to watching a film. I can at least control my exposure to

that. But I can't help that I have to go to work, and I damn well should not be expected to rewire my brain to make the environment tolerable. I'm also highly irritated by incompetently timid and dangerous drivers on the freeway; should I seek medical treatment, or should we educate and train people better before handing them a license?Public manners do not kick in at the point of your own sensitivity. There is a cultural baseline. Elbows on the dinner table don't happen to bother me, but I know it's not well-regarded so I don't do it. The fact that some people are not bothered by cud-chewing and snot-gargling in others doesn't excuse them from monitoring their own behavior.If we have a problem, maybe it's that we are reflexively over-polite and don't know how to confront slovenly pigs without feeling like jerks ourselves. Maybe we need to adopt just a bit of their

courtesy-blindness and learn to stick up for our own sanity.

[Guest guest]

i think people can learn to pick up those certain sounds and maybe even annoy them, but i think to have that anger/anxiety bubble up inside you from a simple sound...genetic.

unless you had a HORRIBLE experience, but most of us did not have a horrible experience that caused this.

Ever think we are *not* the ones with > the> > problem...?> > > > > > I found this group recently through a fluke mention of SSSS on a> > weblog, and was relieved to learn that I was not alone in being> > disgusted and enraged by other people's offensive habits and lack > of> > courtesy.> > > > But I'm a little disturbed to learn that people are looking at> > undergoing medical studies and taking cocktails of medication to > cope> > with the problem.> > > > What kind of medication do you suppose would help obnoxious,> > oblivious people develop a reasonable sensitivity to gross bodily> > noises and rude

behavior?> > > > What kind of clinical study would help office workers realize that> > squishing and popping a wad of gum for 8 hours in a room full of> > people is no more acceptable than playing rap music on a boombox?> > > > I've already quit going to movie theaters because some genius > decided> > loud crunchy junk food was the perfect complement to watching a > film.> > I can at least control my exposure to that. But I can't help that > I> > have to go to work, and I damn well should not be expected to > rewire> > my brain to make the environment tolerable.> > > > I'm also highly irritated by incompetently timid and dangerous> > drivers on the freeway; should I seek medical treatment, or > should we> > educate and train people better before handing them a

license?> > > > Public manners do not kick in at the point of your own > sensitivity.> > There is a cultural baseline. Elbows on the dinner table don't > happen> > to bother me, but I know it's not well-regarded so I don't do it. > The> > fact that some people are not bothered by cud-chewing and snot-> > gargling in others doesn't excuse them from monitoring their own> > behavior.> > > > If we have a problem, maybe it's that we are reflexively over-> polite> > and don't know how to confront slovenly pigs without feeling like> > jerks ourselves. Maybe we need to adopt just a bit of their > courtesy-> > blindness and learn to stick up for our own sanity.> >>

[Guest guest]

i like the banter on here and feel respectful disagreement is par for the course. i cringe when i see someone throw around such a personal judgment as 'phony' though. humans are complex and so is this condition most likely. Maybe what we have requires medication - maybe meditation or some other relaxation technique. maybe it's genetic maybe it's a conditioned response that develops over time.

'think with your mind open' might be a good t-shirt slogan for our group.

'we don't know, what we don't know' which is why most of us are on here seeking some solace.

-rb

Subject: Re: Ever think we are *not* the ones with the problem...?To: Soundsensitivity Date: Wednesday, July 23, 2008, 9:07 AM

no, i have never thought that and that's because it's not just rude obnoxious noises such as smacking and bubble gum chewing that annoy me. Some of us go crazy at certain letters and the way some people say them. It's the way people friggin talk and talking should not be bothersome, but it is. So, there has to be a problem with us.

Now don't get me wrong. I know chewing and smacking can drive you nuts, but i also think it's possible that some people just pay too much attention to it and THINK they might have 4s. But I do know that some people can't remember not being annoyed by such things and really do have 4s. I'm just saying, if you are out there and you THINK you have 4s, you don't and trust me you would know. You don't need help. Sounds harsh, but I just don't like phonys.

Ever think we are *not* the ones with the problem...?

I found this group recently through a fluke mention of SSSS on a weblog, and was relieved to learn that I was not alone in being disgusted and enraged by other people's offensive habits and lack of courtesy.But I'm a little disturbed to learn that people are looking at undergoing medical studies and taking cocktails of medication to cope with the problem.What kind of medication do you suppose would help obnoxious, oblivious people develop a reasonable sensitivity to gross bodily noises and rude behavior? What kind of clinical study would help office workers realize that squishing and popping a wad of gum for 8 hours in a room full of people is no more acceptable than playing rap music on a boombox?I've already quit going to movie theaters because some genius decided loud crunchy junk food was the perfect complement to watching a film. I can at least control my exposure to

that. But I can't help that I have to go to work, and I damn well should not be expected to rewire my brain to make the environment tolerable. I'm also highly irritated by incompetently timid and dangerous drivers on the freeway; should I seek medical treatment, or should we educate and train people better before handing them a license?Public manners do not kick in at the point of your own sensitivity. There is a cultural baseline. Elbows on the dinner table don't happen to bother me, but I know it's not well-regarded so I don't do it. The fact that some people are not bothered by cud-chewing and snot-gargling in others doesn't excuse them from monitoring their own behavior.If we have a problem, maybe it's that we are reflexively over-polite and don't know how to confront slovenly pigs without feeling like jerks ourselves. Maybe we need to adopt just a bit of their

courtesy-blindness and learn to stick up for our own sanity.