Words 'hit' me as bad as sounds....

October 10, 2008

i just saw the list(s) of words that you all wrote down that you

can't stand to hear and i laughed so hard, i know it's not funny but

because i have 'a list' too, my response is the same to these words

as it is to the 'sounds' that trigger me. here are the one's i can

think of right now: people who say 'in other words' instead of just

saying what they mean the first time, repetitive phone numbers given

on a commercial or the radio especially when it's done really fast,

people who say 'like' every 3rd word, i have a friend who says really

fast 'and blahblahblahblah' and then there's either and neither, i

can't stand to hear these with the long i sound, i will 'YELL' at

these sounds and turn them off if i can. there are many commercials

too, i just try to keep the remote close enough to 'mute' or turn off

the t.v. i also read where people are trying to find help from

professional's who have 'a clue'....it's not easy, i shared 'this'

with my very nice psychiatrist who i see once a month and she took an

interest, i brought her some things to read but she told me, she

didn't understand the 'RAGE'........i asked her if ther was 'any'

sound that bothered her and she thought of one and i asked her to

imagine hearing that sound over and over, she kind of 'get's it' but

doesn't have a clue of what kind of help to offer. she would

probably suggest (well meaning) that i try some new drug but i don't

like to take anything except one medication i take for severe

panic/anxiety disorder i've had since 1980 and if i don't take it, my

attacks are almost like a seizure and feels like i'm dying. i am

sitting here now, earplugs in,just closed my window because the birds

chirping sounds like i'm in the middle of a jungle. i know that it

is 'hearing' these sounds that get to us but also the 'visuals' that

give me and most of you the same feeling... i think our brains are

wired differently somehow. what a way to live, it's hard to share

because most 'normal people' just 'don't get it' and think we're kind

of 'nuts'......donnie

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