a control issue

[Guest guest]

Wow, I never really thought of that before, as I, too, don't think

I'm a very controlling person. But I think that is a big part of

this. I HATE that I HAVE to sit there and endure it and suffer. It

seems so unfair and I want it to stop, but I can't make it without

getting belligerent with someone or even asking politely (which ends

us pissing them off too).

I'll have to think about this some more. At work, I'm definitely NOT

a control freak. I want to be told what to do and then be left alone

to do it. But I like someone else to make the decisions. At home,

though, it's very different. I like to have things my way, organized,

at least in the kitchen and bathroom and living room. Because my

hubby snores, we sleep separately usually, so I keep my bedroom the

way I like it and vice versa. But I know I am pushy about having

things look nice in the common or public areas of the house. Not

perfect, but just not too messy or out of array.

>

> Hi Everyone,

> I've been a member for sometime now and mostly lurking and reading

> everyones posts.

> I've been doing some inner searching as to how I became this way.

> I remember as a child hating the noise my brother made brushing his

> teeth. Then I remember hating the way he played with his toy

> cars...like the sounds he made. He would never stop when I asked

him

> to. I flew into a rage everytime my dad lite up a cigarette (which

> thankfully he quite in 1979), probably because of me. Then the way

> my mom popped her gum...geesh. Then the crunching thing. It was

> only my immediate family though. It was only my immediate family

> until recently I've noticed it coming from all angles. I do

honestly

> believe for me that if I'm in a bad mood or somewhat irritable and

> someone makes a noise that bothers me...that is it. It is now a

> noise/person that sets it off. Even when I ask them to stop it

> appears to be funny for them and they continue. I've learnt to

deal

> with most of it, because eating is only a temporary noise and

> eventually everyone is done. My main problem is gum...the never

> ending wad of noise. Heck I think even if I was deaf it would

still

> irritate me just watching the way the person moves their mouth. I

> just wanna reach over and pull it out of their mouths. OK I might

> get bit.

> But in all honesty I'm beginning to think it is somewhat a control

> issue with me sometimes. It is something I can't control. Not

that

> I'm an overly controlling person, but it just seems if the radio is

> bugging me I turn it off...If the TV is bothering me I turn it off

> and so on, BUT with the noise issue coming from people I have

> absolutely no control. It is so frustrating...

> Anyways that is just my thoughts for this rainy Tuesday!

> Enjoy the silence~~~~~~~~~~~~~Vicki

>