Giving thanks

[Guest guest]

Happy thanksgiving to all. I give thanks that I have a child that is

so different that he is the tommorrow that our world brings. I made a

mistake when my child was acting differnt at dinner today that I said

yes he is acting up. I was so nervous. I was told thats ok thats how

he is. I said but that his behavior is not part of society. No, this

is society the way society is turning. I am disgusted with how I was

so nervous with his behavior. This is society and society has to

change what they feel is normal. I am ignorant. Thanksgiving should

mean to us is that we heard our child speak a word. My son is verbal

but not conversational verbal. There are so more other illnesses that

can be explained and helped. How can all our children have the same

symptoms but no understanding. I am disgusted. But also disgusted at

myself by not just accepting my child with his differences. It was not

pretty at this resturant with his behavior and the looks by other

children. Even his cousins could not even say Hi to him. I love my

son so much I will never give up. I made wishes at every one of my

birthdays, please let my son talk. He talks. I get my wishes. I need

to accept this. This is so hard. Im sorry to ramble. Kathy

[Guest guest]

Kathy, I so understand how you feel, and I have spent many Thanksgivings gobbling down my food so I could take Karac home quickly before a disaster happened, Usually 30 minutes was as long as he could last,and with me on pins and needles the whole time, but I didn't give up and yesterday he was awesome. He ate his dinner calmly at the table with other members of the family; afterward I gave him his ipod and he relaxed on the sofa for the whole afternoon; I was able to eat and visit in leisure. My point is don't give up; he will learn and he and the family will be blessed. Love and hugs, Pat K

Happy thanksgiving to all. I give thanks that I have a child that is so different that he is the tommorrow that our world brings. I made a mistake when my child was acting differnt at dinner today that I said yes he is acting up. I was so nervous. I was told thats ok thats how he is. I said but that his behavior is not part of society. No, this is society the way society is turning. I am disgusted with how I was so nervous with his behavior. This is society and society has to change what they feel is normal. I am ignorant. Thanksgiving should mean to us is that we heard our child speak a word. My son is verbal but not conversational verbal. There are so more other illnesses that can be explained and helped. How can all our children have the same symptoms but no understanding. I am disgusted. But also disgusted at myself by not just accepting my child with his differences. It was not pretty at this resturant with his behavior and the looks by other children. Even his cousins could not even say Hi to him. I love my son so much I will never give up. I made wishes at every one of my birthdays, please let my son talk. He talks. I get my wishes. I need to accept this. This is so hard. Im sorry to ramble. Kathy Life should be easier. So should your homepage. Try the NEW AOL.com.

[Guest guest]

Hi, Kathy...Happy Thanksgiving to you too. is verbal but not conversational. And I too am grateful just for that. Blessings to you...you are a good mom. This is a hard yet rewarding job we are doing....

e

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Friday, November 28, 2008 1:26:52 AMSubject: Giving thanks

Happy thanksgiving to all. I give thanks that I have a child that is so different that he is the tommorrow that our world brings. I made a mistake when my child was acting differnt at dinner today that I said yes he is acting up. I was so nervous. I was told thats ok thats how he is. I said but that his behavior is not part of society. No, this is society the way society is turning. I am disgusted with how I was so nervous with his behavior. This is society and society has to change what they feel is normal. I am ignorant. Thanksgiving should mean to us is that we heard our child speak a word. My son is verbal but not conversational verbal. There are so more other illnesses that can be explained and helped. How can all our children have the same symptoms but no understanding. I am disgusted. But also disgusted at myself by not just accepting my child with his differences. It was not pretty at this

resturant with his behavior and the looks by other children. Even his cousins could not even say Hi to him. I love my son so much I will never give up. I made wishes at every one of my birthdays, please let my son talk. He talks. I get my wishes. I need to accept this. This is so hard. Im sorry to ramble. Kathy

[Guest guest]

Dear Kathy,

I'm new to this board. I joined a few months ago and I've been

lurking. I was so moved when I read your email. I felt I was going

to cry, you spoke honestly and with clarity from the heart.

Why are you disgusted at yourself, when from every line of what you

wrote shouts how much you love your son and how much grief you feel.

You want to accept his disability. You know what, I think there's

very few people who truly do take that on. I think we think we do -

until something " happens " . Why compare yourself to those who do not

have the struggle that you have every day?

Its human to want more - to want your child to have a full active

life, to want the child you expected. Tonight I was sitting with my

husband who was tuned in to some reality tv show and I thought what a

journey. I wish I had more time to live on earth, the time to just

love and treasure my little boy for as long as it is my path to do so.

You touched on something profound. It's other people who have the

problem. We see inside our children, the purity that is Jesus.

Their souls are close to the surface. That is why we cherish them,

we cherish their struggle, we rejoice and we mourn in their fight.

I haven't been on this journey very long (4 years) and my Son has

some language. However I look into the future in my darkest moments

and I feel just like you.

I saw my son almost recover only for him to tumble backwards again

into regression. This morning I woke with that familiar knot in my

stomach. I bet every Mother on this board knows that feeling.

I thought I remember this, I'm going through it all over again, the

pain. I tried to look into the future about how I might cope. I sat

in the back room before everyone got up and cried my eyes out. Then

I said I recognise this feeling, I've coped with it before, and I'll

cope again. And despite the crap I felt this morning, I sat there

and I prayed. I apologised, and I just said the Our Father. I said,

I'm sorry, I'm not good at praying, but I know you can hear me and

see into my heart and what I am feeling.

When I'm at my worst I sit really quietly when I get the chance and

all I do is ask for God to grace me with his presence. My prayer

goes God the Father, look into my heart, and help me. My prayer

habits have changed. I used to think, Oh I'll pray later, when I

have time, but that is really changing, now I just ask for help when

I need it. I'm not some mad religious type at all, in fact I feel a

bit of a failure in that direction.

Tonight when I put my son to bed, he lay next to me and looked into

my eyes and let me stroke his hair for ages. I told him, you're

beautiful, you're my heart, I would never change you for another

little boy, you're my world. He just lay there and let me, he never

does this, our close contact is brief, he has really bad sensory

issues. I felt this was proof God answered my prayer - he knew what

I needed and helped us have this moment.

Keep praying, keep hoping. You will be heard and loved, protect your

child's soul with love. He is lucky. His cousins don't understand,

but he has you.

Happy Thanksgiving,

Eileen xx

>

> Happy thanksgiving to all. I give thanks that I have a child that

is

> so different that he is the tommorrow that our world brings. I

made a

> mistake when my child was acting differnt at dinner today that I

said

> yes he is acting up. I was so nervous. I was told thats ok thats

how

> he is. I said but that his behavior is not part of society. No,

this

> is society the way society is turning. I am disgusted with how I

was

> so nervous with his behavior. This is society and society has to

> change what they feel is normal. I am ignorant. Thanksgiving

should

> mean to us is that we heard our child speak a word. My son is

verbal

> but not conversational verbal. There are so more other illnesses

that

> can be explained and helped. How can all our children have the

same

> symptoms but no understanding. I am disgusted. But also disgusted

at

> myself by not just accepting my child with his differences. It was

not

> pretty at this resturant with his behavior and the looks by other

> children. Even his cousins could not even say Hi to him. I love

my

> son so much I will never give up. I made wishes at every one of

my

> birthdays, please let my son talk. He talks. I get my wishes. I

need

> to accept this. This is so hard. Im sorry to ramble. Kathy

>