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thoughts vs. voices

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Question for ya all.

 

Joei went through a situation tonite where she told me that though she didn't

want to and wasn't go to, her thoughts were telling her to kill herself.  She

had the same old images of the knife, and a new one of putting a gun to her

head.  She rated the urge a 4 between 1 and 10.  What was different this time is

that she used the words " kill myself. "

 

I called the crisis center because I don't feel I am qualified to assess that

sort of thing.  After they had me lock the knives in the trunk of my car (that

was just way to real for me!) they asked me if her thoughts were telling her to

take the actions, or if she heard voices. 

 

When I asked Joei if her thoughts urged her or if a voice was telling her to

take the actions, she became pale and got a confused look. She told me she

thought it was her thoughts.

 

Now that she is asleep and I am thinking, I wonder if she was truthful with me.

She is so embarrassed by all of this, I wonder if she didn't want to say it was

voices?

 

She has been really agitated this weekend, even though Hannah was here. They

laughed and were their usual pain in the butt selfs, lol, but she kept saying

she just wanted to hit something because of her anger.  She was very

argumentative as well.

 

As soon as Hannah left, she became so sad. She had to take the anxiety meds

twice today since then.

 

Anyway, my question is how do you know if it is a thought or voices?  Though I'm

pretty confident she is telling me everything, I am wondering now if she

actually does hear voices. Maybe that is something that just freaks her out to

much to tell me.

 

She's asleep now and she said the thoughts were gone. The whole situation lasted

about an hour, it was right when I put her to bed that she told me. It was

really hard for her to tell me, she hemmed and hawed and said it was so

embarrassing that she didn't want to say what her thoughts were.

 

Did anyone go out on family leave from work while treatment was happening?  If

so, can she get social security if I was to do that?

~~Kathy

 

gkathy40@...

http://www.myspace.com/clearingachannel

yahoo messenger id  gkathy40@...

Courage is not living without fear.

Courage is being scared to death and doing the right thing anyway.

-Chae

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