Re: Follow Up question on Inositol

[Guest guest]

>> Instead of getting angry that our 6 yr old couldn't manage his

emotions/thoughts the way his peers can, we adjusted our expectations and tried

to help him based on his current abilities.

Exactly! It sounds like you and your husband have figured out a great approach.

When our daughter first started struggling we had no idea it could be OCD. We

would get SO frustrated and angry with her because she was afraid of a tornado

or she would refuse to wear a coat (when it's 6 degrees outside!) or she would

change her clothes repeatedly with no apparent reason. We'd tell her it was

stupid to be scared, my husband would give her a choice of " a coat or a spank! "

It was awful . . .

Then I started realizing it could be something more than just " childhood fear "

and I spoke to my husband about it. It took a few talks but finally he

apologized to Kate and told her he would never spank her for being afraid. He

said he realized she couldn't always control her fear and that everybody is

afraid of certain things. That simple apology made a huge difference in our

little family!

Kate still has to make the effort to overcome her fears but we do it together as

a family. If she is afraid of the " germs on her hands " (when they're perfectly

clean) we tell her she has to wait 3 minutes or 10 minutes. When she can't

sleep because there might be a tornado we do some calming visualizations

(believe it or not, counting or naming sheep works terrific for her!).

Anyway, it sounds like you are learning how to handle your son's anxieties and

hopefully he will take the cue and begin learning how to handle them himself

without resorting to anger and violence. Good for you!

Beth

[Guest guest]

I am impressed. . .two books, cover to cover. . WOW! Good for you!

And good for your family! You are definitely on the right track.

Reading and learning helped me tremendously too. Just understanding

it better, gave me an understanding of what our son deals with every

minute, of every day. . . Something that he does not have the option

of turning off. But, something that he can learn to get control of,

through the correct therapy, for his own benefit. Learning gave me

the patience that he and I both needed too.

Glad to have shared anything that might have helped. ) Glad you are

here too.

Hugs,

BJ

>

> Barb, BJ, and everyone else who was willing to share their

> thoughts - thanks for the support. After spending the holiday

> weekend reading two OCD books cover to cover and preparing a 3 page

> note of observations for our therapist, my husband joked that finding

> my son's diagnosis has become MY obsession. I decided he's right. So

> for now, we will focus on what we do know and focus our CBT

> on " realistic thinking " and empowering my son to be the boss of his

> own thoughts. For now, we do know there's anxiety. We'll keep an eye

> out for any OCD. I don't like the the Not Otherwise Specified (NOS)

> label, so we've decided to call it " LBS " for Blair Syndrome and

> we'll learn how to cope when he becomes " possessed " .

>

> We were dreading this long holiday weekend. But I'm happy to say we

> had a great time. Edgar the Angery stayed mostly in his crate, and

> when Warren the Worrier showed up, my son was better able to lock him

> back up too. My husband and I also realized that we are a big part

> of the equation, and the efforts we made to calm our own tempers,

> manage our own frustrations and keep our own voices calm made a huge

> difference in the family dynamics. Instead of getting angry that our

> 6 yr old couldn't manage his emotions/thoughts the way his peers can,

> we adjusted our expectations and tried to help him based on his

> current abilities. We wouldn't yell at a physically handicapped kid

> who couldn't run a race or a mentally handicapped kid who couldn't

> handle calculus. So we had to think of our son as having a very real,

> albeit invisible, handicap. And with this, came a freedom from our

> own expectations and a deeper resevoir of patience.

>

> Thank you all for your support. The past month has been hell and it's

> been a life saver to have someplace to come where everyone understood

> and I didn't have to feel defensive of my family.

>

[Guest guest]

Hi, glad your holiday went well! You have a good plan now, good idea

about expectations. I think we all get obsessed with OCD but then how

else do we learn about it and do all that initial reading and come up

with good plans like your's?! Keep us updated on how everything is

going.

>

> Barb, BJ, and everyone else who was willing to share their

> thoughts - thanks for the support. After spending the holiday

> weekend reading two OCD books cover to cover and preparing a 3 page

> note of observations for our therapist, my husband joked that finding