Re: So scared - I think it's time for meds (BJ)

[Guest guest]

Hi BJ, Staci here. I was just reading what you wrote to about

your earlier stroke. How are you doing today? How's your heart and

your overall health? I pray you are doing well! It's been put on my

heart to pray specifically for your health. To go through that AND a

young child with ocd at the same time...my goodness...no wonder you

are such a strong, compassionate woman! Take good care of yourself!

And congrats to your son for his award. What a wonderful

accomplishment! I look forward to days like that in our future.

Big Hugs,

Staci

(p.s. I'll be praying for your Dad too. I lost a beloved Aunt to

Alzheimers in August. It's so hard)

> >

> > HI BJ,

> > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

probably

> > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks later.

I'm

> > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad. It's

> > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

glad he

> > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we all

got

> > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> >

> > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

reasonable

> > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after we've

paid

> > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here then in

other

> > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20 visits a

> > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

psychologist

> > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So that's

a

> > good thing.

> >

> > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that are

IN

> > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I couldn't

even

> > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

country

> > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing told

me

> > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

insurance

> > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth their

> > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct specialty.

The

> > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly " one

of

> > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

network. It

> > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> >

> > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic). They say

> > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost at 5

> > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

again.

> >

> > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

separated

> > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me. This

all

> > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

definitely

> > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I feel

that

> > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > tremendously.

> >

> > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when not

at

> > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that it's

the

> > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it out at

> > home. My son's is the opposite.

> >

> > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes me sad

that

> > he's dealing with so much.

> >

> > Thanks again.

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I love this group! I think I'm going to suggest the bracelet idea to my

daughter. She is so afraid of spending the night at Grandma & Grandpa's house

or anywhere else. Last night we had a babysitter and she was really anxious --

even though she had fun playing games with the sitter (who is only 4 years older

but much more mature).

I asked her whether she was more scared of staying with a stranger or worried

about mom & dad. She said she's more worried about us getting hurt or not

coming home. Looking back, I remember being 12 years old and my mother was just

furious because I could go and babysit other people's kids just fine but I'd cry

when my parents left me and my two brothers home alone. I wasn't worried so

much for myself as that something would happen while they were gone . . . either

to me or to them. Fires, car accidents, what-have-you. I was terrified . . .

and I don't have OCD.

So, that makes a lot of sense. Maybe a little memento would help her anxiety

when we're apart. Last night we left her Daddy's cell phone number and she

called him but only once and she was just anxious so he was able to talk her

down with just a bit of reassurance.

Thanks for the ideas, though! I'll try it!

Beth

[Guest guest]

Awwwwww, Staci, thank you. You are so kind. I appreciate it. )

I will write you personally and answer some of your questions.

Hugs,

BJ

> > >

> > > HI BJ,

> > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> probably

> > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks later.

> I'm

> > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad. It's

> > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> glad he

> > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we all

> got

> > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > >

> > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> reasonable

> > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after we've

> paid

> > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here then in

> other

> > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20 visits a

> > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> psychologist

> > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So that's

> a

> > > good thing.

> > >

> > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that are

> IN

> > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I couldn't

> even

> > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> country

> > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing told

> me

> > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> insurance

> > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth their

> > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct specialty.

> The

> > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly " one

> of

> > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> network. It

> > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > >

> > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic). They say

> > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost at 5

> > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> again.

> > >

> > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> separated

> > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me. This

> all

> > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> definitely

> > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I feel

> that

> > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > tremendously.

> > >

> > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when not

> at

> > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that it's

> the

> > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it out at

> > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > >

> > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes me sad

> that

> > > he's dealing with so much.

> > >

> > > Thanks again.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi and BJ. I've been reading through this strand and really relating.

I'm paralyzed and understand how hard it is too deal with the complications of

my own health while trying to help a child with OCD. My prayers are with you

BJ.

On another front, I'm having a similar problem as . We've tried Native

Remedies, NeuroScience, and Prozac. All with great results, at first. It seems

that several weeks into treatment we always relapse. We are there again. The

prozac brought huge relief at first, and I must say that the situation is still

better than it was, but the OCD is really heating up again. Yesterday was one

of those days that really tried my patience! He couldn't keep his hands off me

and if he thought I wasn't giving him enough attention he would slap me or yell

at me. He kept telling me that things I said (usually relating to consequences

for behavior) was " tickling his brain " . He would get upset and just run through

the house or go outside and lay on the concrete in the rain! My saving grace

was that I had to leave for my husband's office party. Do you guys have any

thoughts on this? I appreciate any feedback. Thanks.

Walk by Faith

Tyler

________________________________

To:

Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 2:38:18 AM

Subject: Re: So scared - I think it's time for meds (BJ)

Awwwwww, Staci, thank you. You are so kind. I appreciate it. )

I will write you personally and answer some of your questions.

Hugs,

BJ

> > >

> > > HI BJ,

> > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> probably

> > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks later.

> I'm

> > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad. It's

> > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> glad he

> > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we all

> got

> > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > >

> > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> reasonable

> > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after we've

> paid

> > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here then in

> other

> > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20 visits a

> > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> psychologist

> > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So that's

> a

> > > good thing.

> > >

> > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that are

> IN

> > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I couldn't

> even

> > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> country

> > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing told

> me

> > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> insurance

> > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth their

> > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct specialty.

> The

> > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly " one

> of

> > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> network. It

> > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > >

> > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic). They say

> > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost at 5

> > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> again.

> > >

> > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> separated

> > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me. This

> all

> > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> definitely

> > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I feel

> that

> > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > tremendously.

> > >

> > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when not

> at

> > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that it's

> the

> > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it out at

> > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > >

> > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes me sad

> that

> > > he's dealing with so much.

> > >

> > > Thanks again.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I just want to thank everyone for all their ideas, suggestions, and

most of all, the support!! No one else can understand what we all go

through.

Jordana, you asked how my son is on playdates, etc. He's fine. He

tells me that he always worries about me when we're not together, but

he manages not to cry on playdates. He said he almost did once, but

it passed because he was having too much fun.

Kathy, I love the idea of the bracelets! My son loves wearing those

rubbery wristbands (he has one that he swears is his good luck charm -

I hope he never loses it!). I'll suggest it to him. He's very

crafty and would probably love to make something together with me.

When he had separation anxiety a few years ago, he kept a heart

shaped stone in his pocket that I gave to him. Then I gave him a

small laminated picture of us, but he said that it made him sadder

when he looked at it!

My husband and I are going out alone tonight (we haven't done this in

years!), and my son is actually excited about having some special

alone time with his aunt and uncle who will be watching him. He just

keeps asking me what time we'll be home. I hope he can relax and

have fun. I hope I can relax and have fun too!

[Guest guest]

I'm wondering if the treatment that you need is more specifically for

separation anxiety than for OCD.? I'm so glad

that he is handling things well on playdates!? Enjoy tonight and remind yourself

that he

will survive and you deserve this time alone!

Re: So scared - I think it's time for meds (BJ)

I just want to thank everyone for all their ideas, suggestions, and

most of all, the support!! No one else can understand what we all go

through.

Jordana, you asked how my son is on playdates, etc. He's fine. He

tells me that he always worries about me when we're not together, but

he manages not to cry on playdates. He said he almost did once, but

it passed because he was having too much fun.

Kathy, I love the idea of the bracelets! My son loves wearing those

rubbery wristbands (he has one that he swears is his good luck charm -

I hope he never loses it!). I'll suggest it to him. He's very

crafty and would probably love to make something together with me.

When he had separation anxiety a few years ago, he kept a heart

shaped stone in his pocket that I gave to him. Then I gave him a

small laminated picture of us, but he said that it made him sadder

when he looked at it!

My husband and I are going out alone tonight (we haven't done this in

years!), and my son is actually excited about having some special

alone time with his aunt and uncle who will be watching him. He just

keeps asking me what time we'll be home. I hope he can relax and

have fun. I hope I can relax and have fun too!

[Guest guest]

Thank you, . And I will say a prayer for you too. (((you))) I

know that when you have your own health issues, it adds another

dimension of stress to dealing with your child's issues.

Is he off of the the Prozac now, ? Was he having bad side

effects? Did he reach a therapeutic dose, and it still stopped

working? What does the prescribing doctor say about it?

I know for some in here, it was a matter of finding the right

medication. We were lucky because Josh did well on the first one we

tried.

I can't remember, . . .Is he doing any CBT/ERP? If so, is he

struggling with it?

It's a hard thing to parent a child with an anxiety disorder. If you

come down on them too hard, they meltdown and you feel guilty for

causing it. Yet, they can't just run amok either. <sigh>

I recently talked about this with Josh's therapist, because I've been

a little easy on him at times, due to not wanting to make his OCD

worse. But, he pointed out, and rightly so, that the world will not

go easy on him, so he needs to learn boundaries and limitations at

home, where it's administered with love. (my paraphrase) He also

told me, (and I knew this,. . guess I just needed to hear it from

him), not to let it escalate before I do something. Do it right away,

in a calm manner, with consequences that are carried out if he doesn't

comply. And he said, if he freaks out, let him. He will survive it

and get over it. It's actually been working. Imagine that! lol

Thankfully, too, because he's coming up on 17, so he stands over me

and outweighs me.

Nothing easy about OCD, that's for sure.

Hugs,

BJ

> > > >

> > > > HI BJ,

> > > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> > probably

> > > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks later.

> > I'm

> > > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad. It's

> > > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> > glad he

> > > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we all

> > got

> > > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > > >

> > > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> > reasonable

> > > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after we've

> > paid

> > > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here then in

> > other

> > > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20 visits a

> > > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> > psychologist

> > > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So that's

> > a

> > > > good thing.

> > > >

> > > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that are

> > IN

> > > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I couldn't

> > even

> > > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> > country

> > > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing told

> > me

> > > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> > insurance

> > > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth their

> > > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct specialty.

> > The

> > > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly " one

> > of

> > > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> > network. It

> > > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > > >

> > > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic). They say

> > > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost at 5

> > > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> > again.

> > > >

> > > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> > separated

> > > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me. This

> > all

> > > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> > definitely

> > > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I feel

> > that

> > > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > > tremendously.

> > > >

> > > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when not

> > at

> > > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that it's

> > the

> > > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it out at

> > > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > > >

> > > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes me sad

> > that

> > > > he's dealing with so much.

> > > >

> > > > Thanks again.

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Have a great time, . )

BJ

>

> I just want to thank everyone for all their ideas, suggestions, and

> most of all, the support!! No one else can understand what we all go

> through.

>

> Jordana, you asked how my son is on playdates, etc. He's fine. He

> tells me that he always worries about me when we're not together, but

> he manages not to cry on playdates. He said he almost did once, but

> it passed because he was having too much fun.

>

> Kathy, I love the idea of the bracelets! My son loves wearing those

> rubbery wristbands (he has one that he swears is his good luck charm -

> I hope he never loses it!). I'll suggest it to him. He's very

> crafty and would probably love to make something together with me.

> When he had separation anxiety a few years ago, he kept a heart

> shaped stone in his pocket that I gave to him. Then I gave him a

> small laminated picture of us, but he said that it made him sadder

> when he looked at it!

>

> My husband and I are going out alone tonight (we haven't done this in

> years!), and my son is actually excited about having some special

> alone time with his aunt and uncle who will be watching him. He just

> keeps asking me what time we'll be home. I hope he can relax and

> have fun. I hope I can relax and have fun too!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Oops. . Didn't mean for it to sound like I was dispesing parenting

advice, . Was just blathering about my own recent experiences.

Sorry, if it came across wrong. Realized after I sent it, that it

might. Didn't want that.

BJ

> > > > >

> > > > > HI BJ,

> > > > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> > > probably

> > > > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks

later.

> > > I'm

> > > > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad. It's

> > > > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> > > glad he

> > > > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we

all

> > > got

> > > > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > > > >

> > > > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> > > reasonable

> > > > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after we've

> > > paid

> > > > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here then in

> > > other

> > > > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20

visits a

> > > > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> > > psychologist

> > > > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So

that's

> > > a

> > > > > good thing.

> > > > >

> > > > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that

are

> > > IN

> > > > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I couldn't

> > > even

> > > > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> > > country

> > > > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing told

> > > me

> > > > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> > > insurance

> > > > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth their

> > > > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct specialty.

> > > The

> > > > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly " one

> > > of

> > > > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> > > network. It

> > > > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > > > >

> > > > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic).

They say

> > > > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost at 5

> > > > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> > > again.

> > > > >

> > > > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> > > separated

> > > > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me.

This

> > > all

> > > > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> > > definitely

> > > > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I feel

> > > that

> > > > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > > > tremendously.

> > > > >

> > > > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when

not

> > > at

> > > > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that

it's

> > > the

> > > > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it out at

> > > > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > > > >

> > > > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes me sad

> > > that

> > > > > he's dealing with so much.

> > > > >

> > > > > Thanks again.

> > > > >

> > > > >

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Just wanted to say, so glad you are getting out tonight. Enjoy!!!

Our son had separation anxiety before OCD, and during. It is really

hard, and when he was younger I really never knew how to help him.

His attachment and security was through me, and with the OCD got

tangled up and obsessive. But the good news is that as he figured

out how to manage the OCD, or specifically we had to tackle

enmeshment stuff that happened around the OCD he learned how to

separate. Also, mine is a teen and needed to individuate so this was

going on simultaneously I think.

So hard for them when they are dealing with the difficulties of the

OCD, need you, may feel dependent on you, or have some OCD tied up in

being with you.

The thinking about it, or anticipation leading up to the

separation,and the actual separation seems to be the hardest part.

Once you are gone, if they are distracted it gets better or is not

even an issue. Although ours, even when older would say that his

brain would continue to worry and obsess about bad things happening,

likely the OCD forming. I think the medication helped a lot with

this, just the general anxiety part, ours reports he just doesn't

have any any more which is amazing really.

Last thought, there is something called the " 9yr old change " , Waldorf

thing, that talks about this age being the point at which they

realize their is a big bad world out there, death becomes more real,

in short developmentally perception and conceptual understanding of

their world shifts and this can be very overwhelming. We did find

this with ours. He focused on death and illness and fears a lot, no

real OCD at the time.

When I go out I give our son a time when we are likely to be back,

usually add on a half hour. If I do this, it gives him something

concrete to hold onto. I think it is the abstract, indefinite that

is a problem. Might be the wrong thing to do in strict ERP terms,

but have to pick and choose... Think these brains are rigid and

prefer black and white answers. The grey will be forced on them

either way...

Again, enjoy your night out!

Barb

>

> I just want to thank everyone for all their ideas, suggestions, and

> most of all, the support!! No one else can understand what we all

go

> through.

>

> Jordana, you asked how my son is on playdates, etc. He's fine. He

> tells me that he always worries about me when we're not together,

but

> he manages not to cry on playdates. He said he almost did once,

but

> it passed because he was having too much fun.

>

> Kathy, I love the idea of the bracelets! My son loves wearing

those

> rubbery wristbands (he has one that he swears is his good luck

charm -

> I hope he never loses it!). I'll suggest it to him. He's very

> crafty and would probably love to make something together with me.

> When he had separation anxiety a few years ago, he kept a heart

> shaped stone in his pocket that I gave to him. Then I gave him a

> small laminated picture of us, but he said that it made him sadder

> when he looked at it!

>

> My husband and I are going out alone tonight (we haven't done this

in

> years!), and my son is actually excited about having some special

> alone time with his aunt and uncle who will be watching him. He

just

> keeps asking me what time we'll be home. I hope he can relax and

> have fun. I hope I can relax and have fun too!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks BJ. It didn't sound like " dispensing advice " ...just ideas of someone who

cares.

Josiah is still on the Prozac. He did much better today. I got him from school

about an hour early. I'm wondering if that helped, not that I can do that

often, but maybe the school stress is still a bit overwhelming for him. I agree

about the boundries. It seems that OCDers need them a little more frequently

than others. Also, I think that Josiah got so much attention as a baby and

small child because his brother (13 years older and sister 7 years older) really

doted on him, that somehow that's added to the issues. I literally had to

forbid them at one point from dressing him so that he'd be forced to do it

himself!

I'm just really glad he is doing better today. Are the kids up and down

sometimes until the medication reaches a therapeutic dose? He's jumping on the

trampoline right now which is always a good thing! THanks for the hugs and

insight.

Walk by Faith

Tyler

________________________________

To:

Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 1:57:39 PM

Subject: Re: So scared - I think it's time for meds (BJ)

Oops. . Didn't mean for it to sound like I was dispesing parenting

advice, . Was just blathering about my own recent experiences.

Sorry, if it came across wrong. Realized after I sent it, that it

might. Didn't want that.

BJ

> > > > >

> > > > > HI BJ,

> > > > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> > > probably

> > > > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks

later.

> > > I'm

> > > > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad. It's

> > > > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> > > glad he

> > > > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we

all

> > > got

> > > > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > > > >

> > > > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> > > reasonable

> > > > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after we've

> > > paid

> > > > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here then in

> > > other

> > > > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20

visits a

> > > > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> > > psychologist

> > > > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So

that's

> > > a

> > > > > good thing.

> > > > >

> > > > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that

are

> > > IN

> > > > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I couldn't

> > > even

> > > > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> > > country

> > > > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing told

> > > me

> > > > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> > > insurance

> > > > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth their

> > > > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct specialty.

> > > The

> > > > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly " one

> > > of

> > > > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> > > network. It

> > > > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > > > >

> > > > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic).

They say

> > > > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost at 5

> > > > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> > > again.

> > > > >

> > > > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> > > separated

> > > > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me.

This

> > > all

> > > > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> > > definitely

> > > > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I feel

> > > that

> > > > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > > > tremendously.

> > > > >

> > > > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when

not

> > > at

> > > > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that

it's

> > > the

> > > > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it out at

> > > > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > > > >

> > > > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes me sad

> > > that

> > > > > he's dealing with so much.

> > > > >

> > > > > Thanks again.

> > > > >

> > > > >

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Hi, . Josh was up and down a bit until he was on the dosage (he

is on now) for a while. Seems it took about 6 months for things to

really stabilize and stay calmed down for him.

(Glad you understood my post. Sometimes it just doesn't come across

the way you mean for it to.) )

BJ

> > > > > >

> > > > > > HI BJ,

> > > > > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> > > > probably

> > > > > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks

> later.

> > > > I'm

> > > > > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad.

It's

> > > > > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> > > > glad he

> > > > > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we

> all

> > > > got

> > > > > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> > > > reasonable

> > > > > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after

we've

> > > > paid

> > > > > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here

then in

> > > > other

> > > > > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20

> visits a

> > > > > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> > > > psychologist

> > > > > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So

> that's

> > > > a

> > > > > > good thing.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that

> are

> > > > IN

> > > > > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I

couldn't

> > > > even

> > > > > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> > > > country

> > > > > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing

told

> > > > me

> > > > > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> > > > insurance

> > > > > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth

their

> > > > > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct

specialty.

> > > > The

> > > > > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly

" one

> > > > of

> > > > > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> > > > network. It

> > > > > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > > > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic).

> They say

> > > > > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost

at 5

> > > > > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> > > > again.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> > > > separated

> > > > > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me.

> This

> > > > all

> > > > > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> > > > definitely

> > > > > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I

feel

> > > > that

> > > > > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > > > > tremendously.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when

> not

> > > > at

> > > > > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that

> it's

> > > > the

> > > > > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it

out at

> > > > > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes

me sad

> > > > that

> > > > > > he's dealing with so much.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Thanks again.

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

Thanks that helps. He's doing really well at home this weekend but when school

starts again on Monday I have my concerns. Thanks again.

Walk by Faith

Tyler

________________________________

To:

Sent: Saturday, December 13, 2008 11:21:59 PM

Subject: Re: So scared - I think it's time for meds (BJ)

Hi, . Josh was up and down a bit until he was on the dosage (he

is on now) for a while. Seems it took about 6 months for things to

really stabilize and stay calmed down for him.

(Glad you understood my post. Sometimes it just doesn't come across

the way you mean for it to.) )

BJ

> > > > > >

> > > > > > HI BJ,

> > > > > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> > > > probably

> > > > > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks

> later.

> > > > I'm

> > > > > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad.

It's

> > > > > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a way, I'm

> > > > glad he

> > > > > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we

> all

> > > > got

> > > > > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> > > > reasonable

> > > > > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after

we've

> > > > paid

> > > > > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here

then in

> > > > other

> > > > > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20

> visits a

> > > > > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> > > > psychologist

> > > > > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So

> that's

> > > > a

> > > > > > good thing.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that

> are

> > > > IN

> > > > > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I

couldn't

> > > > even

> > > > > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in another

> > > > country

> > > > > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing

told

> > > > me

> > > > > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> > > > insurance

> > > > > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth

their

> > > > > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct

specialty.

> > > > The

> > > > > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly

" one

> > > > of

> > > > > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> > > > network. It

> > > > > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > > > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic).

> They say

> > > > > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost

at 5

> > > > > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it started up

> > > > again.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> > > > separated

> > > > > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me.

> This

> > > > all

> > > > > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> > > > definitely

> > > > > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I

feel

> > > > that

> > > > > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would lessen

> > > > > > tremendously.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when

> not

> > > > at

> > > > > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that

> it's

> > > > the

> > > > > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it

out at

> > > > > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes

me sad

> > > > that

> > > > > > he's dealing with so much.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Thanks again.

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

I can understand why you have your concerns. (

Hoping and praying for the best.

Let us know how it goes, .

BJ

-- In , Tyler wrote:

>

> Thanks that helps. He's doing really well at home this weekend but

when school starts again on Monday I have my concerns. Thanks again.

>

>

> Walk by Faith

> Tyler

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Saturday, December 13, 2008 11:21:59 PM

> Subject: Re: So scared - I think it's time for

meds (BJ)

>

>

> Hi, . Josh was up and down a bit until he was on the dosage (he

> is on now) for a while. Seems it took about 6 months for things to

> really stabilize and stay calmed down for him.

>

> (Glad you understood my post. Sometimes it just doesn't come across

> the way you mean for it to.) )

>

> BJ

>

>

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > HI BJ,

> > > > > > > Thanks for your sympathies. My dad also had Alzheimer's,

> > > > > probably

> > > > > > > stage 5 or 6, when he broke his hip. He died three weeks

> > later.

> > > > > I'm

> > > > > > > sorry you're going through the same thing with your dad.

> It's

> > > > > > > extremely difficult to see them slipping away. In a

way, I'm

> > > > > glad he

> > > > > > > went the way he did, because he still knew all of us, and we

> > all

> > > > > got

> > > > > > > to say our goodbyes. Just still so sad.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > As far as our insurance, they will reimburse 50% of the

> > > > > reasonable

> > > > > > > and customary charges. We have to submit the bills after

> we've

> > > > > paid

> > > > > > > them. We're in NJ, so I know the rates are higher here

> then in

> > > > > other

> > > > > > > areas. There is no deductible, and there is a max of 20

> > visits a

> > > > > > > year. Since the psychiatrist is out of network and the

> > > > > psychologist

> > > > > > > is in network, the 20 visits are completely separate. So

> > that's

> > > > > a

> > > > > > > good thing.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > The insurance company gave us a list of 4 psychiatrists that

> > are

> > > > > IN

> > > > > > > network. None of them are child psychiatrists. And I

> couldn't

> > > > > even

> > > > > > > pronounce their names, it was like I suddenly was in

another

> > > > > country

> > > > > > > (please don't take offense!) The psychologist he's seeing

> told

> > > > > me

> > > > > > > that the really good child psychiatrists don't deal with

> > > > > insurance

> > > > > > > because they get reimbursed so poorly, so it's not worth

> their

> > > > > > > while. She said child psychiatry is such a distinct

> specialty.

> > > > > The

> > > > > > > one we chose is part of a child anxiety clinic, supposedly

> " one

> > > > > of

> > > > > > > the best in the area. " So that's why we're going out of

> > > > > network. It

> > > > > > > doesn't seem like we really have a choice.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > I started giving my son Native Remedy products a month ago

> > > > > > > (Mindsoothe and Purecalm - recently added Nerve Tonic).

> > They say

> > > > > > > that most people see results in 3-5 weeks, so we're almost

> at 5

> > > > > > > weeks. He seemed to be doing better, but then it

started up

> > > > > again.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > It seems that the majority of his anxiety stems from being

> > > > > separated

> > > > > > > from me. He's so worried about something happening to me.

> > This

> > > > > all

> > > > > > > started after I had a car accident 5 years ago. That was

> > > > > definitely

> > > > > > > his trigger, and to this day, he still talks about it. I

> feel

> > > > > that

> > > > > > > if he could turn down the anxiety, that the OCD would

lessen

> > > > > > > tremendously.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > Are there any others out there who only have OCD issues when

> > not

> > > > > at

> > > > > > > home, but are fine when they are home? I usually read that

> > it's

> > > > > the

> > > > > > > other way around - they hold it in at school, and let it

> out at

> > > > > > > home. My son's is the opposite.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > I just want my carefree and confident son back. It makes

> me sad

> > > > > that

> > > > > > > he's dealing with so much.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > > Thanks again.

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > >

> > > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >