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Oh THANKS o very much for the response! I have been so scared! I will look into

the files and also the CBT/ERB therapy. I keep thinking i have done something

wrong. Jonah is scared that he will be taken away from us, his parents. How do

you handle it when he tells you such horrible thoughts? I don't know how and i

panic which i know is not the right way. Again, thanks and i could use any help

i can get.

Jacquie

>

> Subject: Re: New here

> To:

> Date: Thursday, December 25, 2008, 4:50 PM

> Hi Jacquie,

> Just a quick note to say, " Welcome "

> I'm glad you joined this group. Lots of support and

> caring people here!!

> I have two kids with OCD, 12yr old dd, and 7 yr old ds. My

> son has the " bad thoughts " which include harming

> me. Have you brought him for any CBT/ERP therapy? That is

> the first step. Depending on his severity, the doctor may

> also prescribe a med. There are many books on childhood OCD

> at the bookstore and/or Library.

> You can start by looking in the " files " section

> of the group here also.

>

> We are here if you need us!

>

> A little tip to start is to tell him that his mind is

> giving him these bad thoughts because it is like a hiccup.

> It keeps coming and won't go away.This will help him to

> realize he is not going crazy. Is he feeling a lot of

> anxiety with the thoughts? You can also have him name the

> thoughts, like the OCD Monster or something and tell him to

> boss him away.

>

> Hugs

> Judy

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Thursday, December 25, 2008 3:16:13 PM

> Subject: New here

>

>

>

> I am Jacquie a homeschooling SAHM to one 8 year old son

> whom seems to have thoughts he can't control. These

> thoughts are of harming me. I researched on the net and

> discovered OCD. Does anyone else have a child who has these

> thoughts? I really need to learn how to help him and deal

> with these thoughts. Any help would be appriciated.

>

> Thanks,

> Jacquie

>

>

>

>

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Hi,

welcome to the group! You'll find some good info and advice here, but most of

all, support from people who " understand " . My DD, 14, doesn't have the bad

thought version, but the contamination fears instead.

Have you had your son seen by a psychologist? When we thought our daughter had

this (after I researched it), we set up an appointment without telling the doc

what we suspected in the hopes we were wrong! No such luck! At least since you

homeschool, you don't have to worry about that, but I'd definitely get him to

someone to have an official diagnosis, unless you've already done that, of

course.

Debbie

Debbie Cavender

http://twochinadolls.blogspot.com

____________________________________________________________

Save $15 on Flowers and Gifts from FTD!

Shop now at http://offers.netzero.net/TGL1241/?u=http://www.ftd.com/17007

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Something that really helps my daughter is that it is okay to have any

type of thought, and she need not feel guilty about any thought she has.

That's pretty much how I've always handled mine.

What has occasionally happened is the thought repeats and repeats...but

I manage to deliberately distract myself after a bit. It's at those

times that I feel I get a glimpse of how others suffer from the

constant thoughts if distraction doesn't work and they just keep on &

on & on....

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What's interesting for me is that I don't have such issues when I am on

medication, but do when off, so clearly it is chemical in nature.

Re: New here

Something that really helps my daughter is that it is okay to have any

type of thought, and she need not feel guilty about any thought she has.

That's pretty much how I've always handled mine.

What has occasionally happened is the thought repeats and repeats...but

I manage to deliberately distract myself after a bit. It's at those

times that I feel I get a glimpse of how others suffer from the

constant thoughts if distraction doesn't work and they just keep on &

on & on....

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Thanks so much! I did finally get to the library and i checked out some 15-20

books on OCD. I only skim read so far, but one book told of a therapist that

treated OCD and had a patient that did not go to train depots. The patient was

scared he would push someone into the oncoming train. So the therapist actually

took this OCD patient to the train platform and stood in fron of the person and

told him to push her into the train. The person REFUSED to do so even though the

therapist was demanding it. This showed that it was a thoughts problem and not

an action problem. I found that reassuring and very interesting.

I keep thinking of all these questions i have. Some things i am discovering.

Like our son confesses. A LOT. Now i am finding out that it is a part of it!

Also, a few weeks ago he and i went into a dollar store to look around and as we

were leaving he suddenly asks me if he stole something. He says he thought about

it. He says he may have. He has done this once before too. Now i read that it is

another OCD thing.

I feel like i have been in a dark room and suddenly the light has been turned

on bright.

I noticed some of you are christian. We are too and it is taken toll there

too. I mean, my first thought of his bad thoughts is that he is possessed or

something. Now i am beginning to realize that it is THOUGHTS and although very

disturbing, with help, it can be controlled more.

All of you are a ray of sunshine here on these cloudy days.

Thanks again,

Jacquie

>

> Subject: Re: New here

> To:

> Date: Friday, December 26, 2008, 4:34 PM

> Hi Jacquie and welcome. You will find reassurance and

> information

> here! It looks like others have covered the main things

> and BJ has

> given good book suggestions and ideas to reassure your son.

> Not sure

> what else I could add, other than to keep posting your

> questions and

> concerns and there will be someone here with ideas.

>

> We are all in the same boat here, learning as we go. OCD

> is the most

> bizarre disorder I have ever had experience with. The

> beginning

> stage of it, where you are IS really scary, and

> particularily the

> thoughts your son is reporting, so I understand your fears.

> Our son

> had harming thoughts too and he is a teen, so at times we

> didn't know

> what to think.

>

> One of the things they say about OCD is people do not carry

> out there

> thoughts, and usually feel guilt or anxious about them

> which

> indicates it is not something they want to do or will do.

> But the

> OCD keeps repeating the idea, so they start to think

> it's because

> it's something they want to or will do. It is called

> the doubting

> disease for this reason, it keeps them fearing and

> wondering what is

> real.

>

> Not sure if someone mentioned the website-

> www.westsuffolkpsych.homestead, they have some good

> articles written

> by an expert who treats OCD. A good resource until you get

> some

> books. Just gooling OCD brings up a lot, I found the

> Wikepedia had

> up to date info on explanations and treatments.

>

> Hang in there. Knowledge is power and as you and your son

> come to

> understand the OCD it will get easier to know how to

> manage.

>

> I am sending you a cyber HUG!!!

> Barb

>

>

> >

> > Oh THANKS o very much for the response! I have been so

> scared! I

> will look into the files and also the CBT/ERB therapy. I

> keep

> thinking i have done something wrong. Jonah is scared that

> he will be

> taken away from us, his parents. How do you handle it when

> he tells

> you such horrible thoughts? I don't know how and i

> panic which i know

> is not the right way. Again, thanks and i could use any

> help i can

> get.

> > Jacquie

> >

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Jacquie, I am so glad that you are feeling better about all of this now that you

understand that your son is still the wonderful son you have always had, it is

just a brain glitch that makes him have OCD thoughts and doubts.  His thoughts

are quite common for those who have OCD.  I remember that I used to have a fear

of being left alone in dressing rooms because I had this weird doubt whenever I

left one that maybe I hurt someone in there.  It made no sense because the only

person in the dressing room were my mom and I, but still...unless she waited and

left with me, I would have this obsessive worry that would torture me.  There

is a specific treatment that works for this called cognitive behavior therapy

that involves exposure and response prevention.  You can try to locate such a

therapist near you by going to the Obsessive Compulsive Foundation website.

 Also, just by letting your son know about OCD and why he is having such

thoughts and that there are many other kids who have them, I bet he will feel so

much better about himself.

Re: New here

> To:

> Date: Friday, December 26, 2008, 4:34 PM

> Hi Jacquie and welcome. You will find reassurance and

> information

> here! It looks like others have covered the main things

> and BJ has

> given good book suggestions and ideas to reassure your son.

> Not sure

> what else I could add, other than to keep posting your

> questions and

> concerns and there will be someone here with ideas.

>

> We are all in the same boat here, learning as we go. OCD

> is the most

> bizarre disorder I have ever had experience with. The

> beginning

> stage of it, where you are IS really scary, and

> particularily the

> thoughts your son is reporting, so I understand your fears.

> Our son

> had harming thoughts too and he is a teen, so at times we

> didn't know

> what to think.

>

> One of the things they say about OCD is people do not carry

> out there

> thoughts, and usually feel guilt or anxious about them

> which

> indicates it is not something they want to do or will do.

> But the

> OCD keeps repeating the idea, so they start to think

> it's because

> it's something they want to or will do. It is called

> the doubting

> disease for this reason, it keeps them fearing and

> wondering what is

> real.

>

0A> Not sure if someone mentioned the website-

> www.westsuffolkpsych.homestead, they have some good

> articles written

> by an expert who treats OCD. A good resource until you get

> some

> books. Just gooling OCD brings up a lot, I found the

> Wikepedia had

> up to date info on explanations and treatments.

>

> Hang in there. Knowledge is power and as you and your son

> come to

> understand the OCD it will get easier to know how to

> manage.

>

> I am sending you a cyber HUG!!!

> Barb

>

>

> >

> > Oh THANKS o very much for the response! I have been so

> scared! I

> will look into the files and also the CBT/ERB therapy. I

> keep

> thinking i have done something wrong. Jonah is scared that

> he will be

> taken away from us, his parents. How do you handle it when

> he tells

> you such horrible thoughts? I don't know how and i

> panic which i know

> is not the right way. Again, thanks and i could use any

> help i can

> get.

> > Jacquie

> >

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> > >

> > > Oh THANKS o very much for the response! I have been so

> > scared! I

> > will look into the files and also the CBT/ERB therapy. I

> > keep

> > thinking i have done something wrong. Jonah is scared that

> > he will be

> > taken away from us, his parents. How do you handle it when

> > he tells

> > you such horrible thoughts? I don't know how and i

> > panic which i know

> > is not the right way. Again, thanks and i could use any

> > help i can

> > get.

> > > Jacquie

> > >

>

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Life will be good.  I have pretty severe OCD and I have a wonderful career and

am raising my 9 year old twins on my own.  I have a handful of very close

friends and then many more friends whom I consider more friends because our kids

do things together.  Life is good here.  Yes, I had a hard fight against OCD

involving medication (Anafranil was what helps me best.) and intensive cognitive

behavior therapy with a wonderful therapist who specializes in OCD.  I still am

on medication and I still have OCD fears/issues, but everyone in life has

something they have to cope with so I don't dwell on my misfortune, but rather

on how I can work around it.  

My daughter has OCD and trich (compulsive hair pulling) and she is getting

therapy for it and is on the same med I am on.  She is doing much better than

before, but is still definitely stressed and worried a  lot of the time.  She

has always seemed " different " , but it very bright and does amazingly

academically.  She has some good friends, but would like more.  This vacation

she has had a sleepover, or a playdate every day so far, but today when I was to

tired to do anything but have a " lazy " day.  

This is new to you so it seems overwhelming, but once you learn more about it

and seek a therapist who specializes in OCD for your son, you will feel much

more optimistic about life.  You don't have to change your hopes and dreams for

him.

Re: Re: New here

Will life ever get good again? Will there ever be a normal again? How do i know

it is not something worse? DH & I are going out and taking Jonah to a sitters

tonight. DH & I NEVER go anywhere without our son normally but we really want to

go to his company's holiday party tonight. Earlier this week Jonah assured me he

would not tell these thoughts to anyone but us, now today he said he will TRY

not to tell. I got the OCD book for kids that give steps on what to do and we

have read the first chapter today. We talked about what important things to keep

and what important things to toss in the trash. We talked about how the brain is

the same way but sometimes his gets stuck and he needs to train his brain to

toss some thoughts in the trash. We also talked about how these thoughts are not

his fault and he can train his brain to toss these thoughts in the trash.

Do any of your kids seem normal? Will my son loose the few friends he has? I

am just so scared.

Jacquie

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They are showing up for me, Kathy.

BJ

>

>

>

> For some reason my messages aren't showing up today.

>

>

>

> ----- Forwarded Message ----

>

> To:

> Sent: Saturday, December 27, 2008 1:04:09 PM

> Subject: Re: Re: New here

>

>

> Hi Jacquie,

>

> Will life ever get good again? YES!!

>

> Kidlet and I have only been doing this since this past summer, and

life is getting better. It has it's ups and its downs, but once the

panic starts subsiding you will more than likely be able to look at

this in a whole different light. So it at least gets different. We

learn to adapt. The abnormal becomes the norm.

>

> You know it was just a couple months ago that she was unable to

sleep over at anyone's house, and tonight she is happily going to a

friends for the night. She just knows that she needs to take her meds

while there and I send an extra dose of the anxiety meds just in case

she needs them. It goes unspoken that if she gets to far into her

thoughts, she will text me and get on reassurance and thats it.

>

> She was very ashamed of her thoughts in the beginning of all this

and wanted nobody to know. Last month we were on a week long class

trip and she told all the girls in our cabin about OCD and how it

affects her.

>

> In September she was unable to shower but maybe once a week. When

she showered, her thoughts would tell her her legs would turn to

bloody streams. Last week she took 3 showers and during the last one

I told her I would not be going into the bathroom to reassure her for

anything and she was able to take the shower, work through the

thoughts on her own and didn't come out looking pale as a ghost.

>

> The key for us, as it was explained to me by this group, was to

first get the anxiety under control. Once the anxiety is under

control they are more able to do the CBT and think a bit different.

>

> Things definately are not perfect in our house. Her thoughts still

come and go, I think she is starting to get some contamination issues,

and she has developed a vocal tic and a physical tic. Through

educating myself and educating her though, we are no longer in panic

mode.

>

> This is definately an adventure, but we learn to take things in

stride. She's getting a little of her life back, and I'm getting a

little of mine. We relish in the progress and learn to deal with the rest.

>

> Hang in there and stay close to this group. Again, I don't know what

I would do with this group, especially while in panic mode.

>

> ~~Kathy

> Courage is not living without fear.

> Courage is being scared to death and doing the right thing anyway.

> -Chae

>

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Saturday, December 27, 2008 12:13:25 PM

> Subject: Re: Re: New here

>

>

> Will life ever get good again? Will there ever be a normal again?

How do i know it is not something worse? DH & I are going out and

taking Jonah to a sitters tonight. DH & I NEVER go anywhere without

our son normally but we really want to go to his company's holiday

party tonight. Earlier this week Jonah assured me he would not tell

these thoughts to anyone but us, now today he said he will TRY not to

tell. I got the OCD book for kids that give steps on what to do and we

have read the first chapter today. We talked about what important

things to keep and what important things to toss in the trash. We

talked about how the brain is the same way but sometimes his gets

stuck and he needs to train his brain to toss some thoughts in the

trash. We also talked about how these thoughts are not his fault and

he can train his brain to toss these thoughts in the trash.

> Do any of your kids seem normal? Will my son loose the few friends

he has? I am just so scared.

>

> Jacquie

>

>

>

>

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  • 1 month later...

no I havent read any books yet I will defintely check those out. I

am still trying to figure out everything. I dont know anything about

anti depressants or actually any kind of meds associated with this.

I do know that ever since my son was in kindergarten every teacher

has asked me if he was ADD. they tested him this year in 7th grade

and they said he wasnt. I dont know if OCD and ADD goes hand and

hand? I just want to educate myself before the 19th so when they

decide to put him on a certain med I will atleast know what will

happen. Is it normal for kids with OCD to have worrisome thoughts?

does puberty make it show up more?

steph

>

> Hi Steph,

> The SSRI's won't make your son walk around like a zombie. They will

start out at the lowest dosage and work there way up as needed.

>  My daughter is 12 and was diagnosed at age 5. She has been on

Zoloft all this time. We have had to raise it, but luckily for her,

that med worked for the OCD and is still working.

> My son(7) , on the other hand was diagnosed at age 4, and has had

to try several different SSRI'S. They all stopped his thoughts, but

he became very hyper on them and we had to add other meds.

> The thoughts don't all stop on meds alone though. It takes alot of

therapy-CBT and/or ERP. You mentioned your son was in therapy

already, so you are off to a great start.

> Have you read any books yet. ? A good suggestion is " Freeing your

child from OCD " by Tamar Chansky, and another good one is " What to do

when your child has OCD " by Aureen Pinto Wagner " " Imp of the Mind " by

Lee Baer is good for  explaining the " bad thoughts "

> This is a very supportive group. You'll find lots of help here! We

are all here for you!!! Glad you joined!

> Hugs

> judy

>

>

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Share on other sites

no I havent read any books yet I will defintely check those out. I

am still trying to figure out everything. I dont know anything about

anti depressants or actually any kind of meds associated with this.

I do know that ever since my son was in kindergarten every teacher

has asked me if he was ADD. they tested him this year in 7th grade

and they said he wasnt. I dont know if OCD and ADD goes hand and

hand? I just want to educate myself before the 19th so when they

decide to put him on a certain med I will atleast know what will

happen. Is it normal for kids with OCD to have worrisome thoughts?

does puberty make it show up more?

steph

>

> Hi Steph,

> The SSRI's won't make your son walk around like a zombie. They will

start out at the lowest dosage and work there way up as needed.

>  My daughter is 12 and was diagnosed at age 5. She has been on

Zoloft all this time. We have had to raise it, but luckily for her,

that med worked for the OCD and is still working.

> My son(7) , on the other hand was diagnosed at age 4, and has had

to try several different SSRI'S. They all stopped his thoughts, but

he became very hyper on them and we had to add other meds.

> The thoughts don't all stop on meds alone though. It takes alot of

therapy-CBT and/or ERP. You mentioned your son was in therapy

already, so you are off to a great start.

> Have you read any books yet. ? A good suggestion is " Freeing your

child from OCD " by Tamar Chansky, and another good one is " What to do

when your child has OCD " by Aureen Pinto Wagner " " Imp of the Mind " by

Lee Baer is good for  explaining the " bad thoughts "

> This is a very supportive group. You'll find lots of help here! We

are all here for you!!! Glad you joined!

> Hugs

> judy

>

>

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Share on other sites

no I havent read any books yet I will defintely check those out. I

am still trying to figure out everything. I dont know anything about

anti depressants or actually any kind of meds associated with this.

I do know that ever since my son was in kindergarten every teacher

has asked me if he was ADD. they tested him this year in 7th grade

and they said he wasnt. I dont know if OCD and ADD goes hand and

hand? I just want to educate myself before the 19th so when they

decide to put him on a certain med I will atleast know what will

happen. Is it normal for kids with OCD to have worrisome thoughts?

does puberty make it show up more?

steph

>

> Hi Steph,

> The SSRI's won't make your son walk around like a zombie. They will

start out at the lowest dosage and work there way up as needed.

>  My daughter is 12 and was diagnosed at age 5. She has been on

Zoloft all this time. We have had to raise it, but luckily for her,

that med worked for the OCD and is still working.

> My son(7) , on the other hand was diagnosed at age 4, and has had

to try several different SSRI'S. They all stopped his thoughts, but

he became very hyper on them and we had to add other meds.

> The thoughts don't all stop on meds alone though. It takes alot of

therapy-CBT and/or ERP. You mentioned your son was in therapy

already, so you are off to a great start.

> Have you read any books yet. ? A good suggestion is " Freeing your

child from OCD " by Tamar Chansky, and another good one is " What to do

when your child has OCD " by Aureen Pinto Wagner " " Imp of the Mind " by

Lee Baer is good for  explaining the " bad thoughts "

> This is a very supportive group. You'll find lots of help here! We

are all here for you!!! Glad you joined!

> Hugs

> judy

>

>

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