Let it Be

[Guest guest]

I lean towards some mild depression – so when the shorter days and

holidays come, it can really do a number on me. And life feels super-

overwhelming this year for family and financial reasons.

Used to be, when I felt this way, I'd set these clearly unreasonable

holiday workout, business and food " management " goals and IF I

achieved them, I felt resentful that I hadn't enjoyed my holidays and

if I didn't achieve them, I'd feel guilty.

So this holiday season, my theme was " Let it Be "

Whenever I felt down in the dumps, I said to myself " Let it Be " . If I

thought exercising would make me feel better, I did it. If I thought

laying on the couch and watching old Christmas movies would help, I

did that. If I thought decorating the house top to bottom would help,

I did that. If I thought baking cookies would help (a

former " forbidden " action in my regimented food house), I did that.

If I thought planning a five course meal for my husband and me for

Christmas eve would help, I did that. I didn't regiment my exercise.

I didn't create " holiday food rules " and go to parties having filled

up on crudite (ha – like you can ever fill up on crudite).

I simply looked into my heart and said " I don't feel great and I'm

not going to beat myself up for that, I am going to do the first

thing that comes to mind that might make me feel better and `Let it

Be' – let it be anything I want, let it be anything I think will

bring me comfort, let it be anything that I think will make me feel

happier, let it be anything that will help me get through.

And what was strange about it was there was one OTHER really

important thing I didn't do. I didn't go haywire with my eating.

You see, it used to be that by setting up my " food rules " of the

holidays – I always set myself up to fail. By not baking or cooking,

or only cooking " good " foods, I would put myself in " food sneaking "

mode. I would go home to my family and eat healthfully in front of

everyone, only to sneak into the family pantry at midnight and shovel

down as many chips as I could get into my mouth. Or, I'd fill a

sweatshirt pocket with cookies that weren't " my " cookies while no one

was watching to eat later. Or, I'd offer to clean up so I could sneak

extra handfuls of stuffing as I filled the leftover containers. And

I'd also watch others eat and resent the h*ll out of them! What a way

to spend my holidays, right?

But I didn't do ANY of those things this year.

Because I said " Let it Be. "

And in the process, I ate like a normal person. I over-indulged one

day, and then under-indulged the next because my body BEGGED me to

not eat any more and I said " let it be " . I made cookies and didn't

feel the need to lick every bowl or sample every piece while they

were hot. I'm not a big sweets person, so I had a few. There are

still over 3 dozen in the freezer and I feel no desire for them.

They'll be broken out on occasions, parties, etc. throughout the

year – without fear!

I cooked a NEW Christmas Eve Dinner and Christmas Day brunch, trying

new recipes to start new traditions with my husband (we're just 16

months married – this was our first Christmas with just us). Some

recipes were healthful (like a TOO DIE FOR carrot soup that I will

make again and again), others were festive and not

particularly " light " but I was able to balance the meal with fresh

vegetables we both love.

And I did all this because my mantra was " Let it Be " This was not

going to be the best holiday ever – no matter what, but I wasn't

going to try and make it something its not or try and overcome by

pushing myself to be " perfectly healthful. "

And now, I feel okay. I feel like I WANT to pick up on my exercise

and eat a lot more fresh foods not because I have to, but because my

body wants that.

And most importantly, I feel like I made it through the holidays

without doing anything worth beating myself up for and can approach

the New Year without having to feel like I " must get back to

perfection because I'm such a loser " . That's how I would have felt in

years past.

I am going to work today on my New Year's Evolution plan, re-set on

my P90X (http://beachbodycoach.com/esuite/home/iofitwithang ) for 90

days, and prep to paint my workout/BeachBody Business room. Because

today, I'm going to " let it be " as well, and this is where I want to

be!

Take care all!

Ang

(http://beachbodycoach.com/esuite/home/iofitwithang )