Guest guest Posted December 30, 2008 Report Share Posted December 30, 2008 I am so sorry you are going through this. The imp of the mind is an excellent book talking about tape loops for treating obsessive thoughts. I would email the experts on this board, Dr. Chansky and Dr. Wagner and also ask for their advice. They are wonderful. I know your heart breaks for your son, but you are right in that it does get better. The key is just finding the right mix. But what is obvious is that you will not give up on your son, and that is key right there. Kind Regards, Subject: son falling apart To: Date: Tuesday, December 30, 2008, 9:24 AM I have so much to write I don't even know where to start, except to say that I know of no one personally who understands what it's really like to parent an OCD child, and reading the posts on this list daily provides immense comfort that people exist out there who really DO understand.? So I thank each and every one of you profusely for posting and responding while I lurk, because I feel oh so less alone in all this. Xmas break has been hell.? My son (13) has been on a downward spiral since the week before xmas and its going from bad to worse.? The pdoc took him off of his Abilify due to the side effects (voracious appetite and bedwetting). ? The first week off, he became depressed and withdrawn, refusing to do school work and obsessing constantly about what he might or might not be getting for christmas.? We were worried, so filled the prescription for Inderal we were given.? Things went from bad to worse, with daily meltdowns, property destruction, verbal abuse and last night, physically attacking me.? The pdoc agreed to put him back on the Abilify (he is also on 50 mg of Celexa) and it is my one last glimmer of hope that this will put him back on track.? Meanwhile, I am scared out of my mind for him, our family is being traumatized daily.? His 10 year old brother (not OCD) pulled a knife on him last week and had a breakdown afterwards because he can't take living with his brother's OCD and the chaos it causes our family.? We are looking for a therapist for him.? My OCD son's therapist keeps reminding me that the rough spots do smooth out...But what I remember is how bad they can get.? This time last year my son developed panic attacks at school, which eventually resulted in school refusal, a major depressive episode, and 2 hopitalizations. ?? To his credit, the current therapist got my son back on track to finish out the school year, and my son has not only missed zero days of 7th grade, but got on the honor role last term.? But now he keeps saying that my son's OCD is mostly internal obsessive thought that is difficult to access and treat, and much more tricky than physical rituals to tackle like hand washing.? I am beginning to wonder if this is because the therapist doesn't really know how to treat obsessive thinking.? I seem to remember over the years of others with great therapists talking about ERP for obsessive thought with out ritual.? His current tactic is using CBT, for my son to try and catch himself before the o bsessive negative thoughts overwhelm him, and try to think of a different way he can look at a situation. My son is usually triggered by feeling he is being treated unfairly, or by feeling he doesn't have enough time.? Seems like there ought to be some ERP for this, but I don't know what it is!!!? He is also talks about trying to get my son to tolerate " discomfort " produced by his anxiety,but not in a concrete way.? Sorry this post is so long.? I guess I have been storing it up. I know you all alone know the fear and grief I am experiencing. ? It sort of feels like finding out the cancer you thought was in remission is now back, and you have to go through another round of chemo, only hoping that things will turn out better this time, but not ever knowing... - in MI -- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 30, 2008 Report Share Posted December 30, 2008 Hi . I just have a quick question. Why did the pdoc put him back on Abilify instead of trying one of the other atypicals like Seroquel, Risperdal, or Geodon? The side effects can be quite different for each one, yet you may get the same desired effect from them. Good luck, Stormy Subject: son falling apart To: Date: Tuesday, December 30, 2008, 6:24 AM I have so much to write I don't even know where to start, except to say that I know of no one personally who understands what it's really like to parent an OCD child, and reading the posts on this list daily provides immense comfort that people exist out there who really DO understand.? So I thank each and every one of you profusely for posting and responding while I lurk, because I feel oh so less alone in all this. Xmas break has been hell.? My son (13) has been on a downward spiral since the week before xmas and its going from bad to worse.? The pdoc took him off of his Abilify due to the side effects (voracious appetite and bedwetting). ? The first week off, he became depressed and withdrawn, refusing to do school work and obsessing constantly about what he might or might not be getting for christmas.? We were worried, so filled the prescription for Inderal we were given.? Things went from bad to worse, with daily meltdowns, property destruction, verbal abuse and last night, physically attacking me.? The pdoc agreed to put him back on the Abilify (he is also on 50 mg of Celexa) and it is my one last glimmer of hope that this will put him back on track.? Meanwhile, I am scared out of my mind for him, our family is being traumatized daily.? His 10 year old brother (not OCD) pulled a knife on him last week and had a breakdown afterwards because he can't take living with his brother's OCD and the chaos it causes our family.? We are looking for a therapist for him.? My OCD son's therapist keeps reminding me that the rough spots do smooth out...But what I remember is how bad they can get.? This time last year my son developed panic attacks at school, which eventually resulted in school refusal, a major depressive episode, and 2 hopitalizations. ?? To his credit, the current therapist got my son back on track to finish out the school year, and my son has not only missed zero days of 7th grade, but got on the honor role last term.? But now he keeps saying that my son's OCD is mostly internal obsessive thought that is difficult to access and treat, and much more tricky than physical rituals to tackle like hand washing.? I am beginning to wonder if this is because the therapist doesn't really know how to treat obsessive thinking.? I seem to remember over the years of others with great therapists talking about ERP for obsessive thought with out ritual.? His current tactic is using CBT, for my son to try and catch himself before the o bsessive negative thoughts overwhelm him, and try to think of a different way he can look at a situation. My son is usually triggered by feeling he is being treated unfairly, or by feeling he doesn't have enough time.? Seems like there ought to be some ERP for this, but I don't know what it is!!!? He is also talks about trying to get my son to tolerate " discomfort " produced by his anxiety,but not in a concrete way.? Sorry this post is so long.? I guess I have been storing it up. I know you all alone know the fear and grief I am experiencing. ? It sort of feels like finding out the cancer you thought was in remission is now back, and you have to go through another round of chemo, only hoping that things will turn out better this time, but not ever knowing... - in MI -- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 30, 2008 Report Share Posted December 30, 2008 , I can't advise on the medication aspect. But I can certainly sympathize with the anger that comes from having this disease turn what should be a happy family/holiday break into a living hell. My only advice is to go into survival mode and do what you need to to protect your 10 year old. I grew up with a bipolar sister and I worry what harm comes to my daughter from having to cope with my son's issues. It certainly makes it hard to trust your sibling, since you're never sure whether you're dealing with Jekyl or Hyde. So go easy on your 10 year old and arrange for as much time with his friends as you can. This will not only protect him, but also give you more energy to focus on one child at a time. You can worry about improving family dynamics once your older son is stable again. If you're having trouble coping, it can only be that much harder for a child who has less coping skills and less control over his life in general than an adult does. It may help to know that eventually things will get better. But of course, right this moment you're not sure how you can make it through another day. Just remind yourself that bedtime always, eventually, comes. Keep us posted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 30, 2008 Report Share Posted December 30, 2008 Hi , I'm so sorry he's backsliding so bad!! I think I see what the therapist is talking about. Regarding tolerating the discomfort of his anxiety, your son needing to " ride it out " until the anxiety lessens/passes? About being treated unfairly or not having enough time, I understand about trying to look at it from another perspective. (The " unfairly " part could be the teen hormones kicking in; though kids any age can go thru that; perhaps therapist is looking at that not as part of OCD?) But if that's not helping/working, seems he may need to take another tactic with your son. Logic won't work with OCD. For thoughts, personally I think you have to just find what works with the patient. For me, distraction works, but then I understand it's an OCD thought and I don't get too much anxiety. I think generally with OCD the person has to think the thoughts (not do any compulsion they have to reduce anxiety) and ride out the anxiety, sort of finally getting to the point where they have no anxiety with the thought(s). Some people have done well with the method in " Brain Lock " (Relabel, Reattribute, Refocus, Revalue). Does your son have any insight at all regarding OCD, bad thoughts, or that he's obsessing on all this? So sorry, too, about little brother! Is he seeing a therapist to help him cope? I would suggest some family therapy with the OCD therapist, might help, or seeing little brother alone some too. Was 13 yr old raging at or bothering 10 yr old when the incident happened? Sigh, my other sons got fed up with 's OCD but he wasn't having any outbursts towards others, tears over his OCD, etc, but 's OCD didn't really affect them (besides keeping them up later, me not having time for them due to time took, etc.) Did your son wean down on the Abilify before stopping? Hope going back on it helps soon! (((hugs))) > > > I have so much to write I don't even know where to start, except to say that I know of no one personally who understands what it's really like to parent an OCD child, and reading the posts on this list daily provides immense comfort that people exist out there who really DO understand.? So I thank each and every one of you profusely Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 31, 2008 Report Share Posted December 31, 2008 , I can't really add anything to what others have shared. Just wanted to say I'm sorry things are going so badly right now. I hope and pray you can get things turned around soon. BJ > > > I have so much to write I don't even know where to start, except to say that I know of no one personally who understands what it's really like to parent an OCD child, and reading the posts on this list daily provides immense comfort that people exist out there who really DO understand.? So I thank each and every one of you profusely for posting and responding while I lurk, because I feel oh so less alone in all this. > > Xmas break has been hell.? My son (13) has been on a downward spiral since the week before xmas and its going from bad to worse.? The pdoc took him off of his Abilify due to the side effects (voracious appetite and bedwetting).? The first week off, he became depressed and withdrawn, refusing to do school work and obsessing constantly about what he might or might not be getting for christmas.? We were worried, so filled the prescription for Inderal we were given.? Things went from bad to worse, with daily meltdowns, property destruction, verbal abuse and last night, physically attacking me.? The pdoc agreed to put him back on the Abilify (he is also on 50 mg of Celexa) and it is my one last glimmer of hope that this will put him back on track.? Meanwhile, I am scared out of my mind for him, our family is being traumatized daily.? His 10 year old brother (not OCD) pulled a knife on him last week and had a breakdown afterwards because he can't take living with his brother's OCD and the chaos it causes our family.? We are looking for a therapist for him.? My OCD son's therapist keeps reminding me that the rough spots do smooth out...But what I remember is how bad they can get.? This time last year my son developed panic attacks at school, which eventually resulted in school refusal, a major depressive episode, and 2 hopitalizations.?? To his credit, the current therapist got my son back on track to finish out the school year, and my son has not only missed zero days of 7th grade, but got on the honor role last term.? But now he keeps saying that my son's OCD is mostly internal obsessive thought that is difficult to access and treat, and much more tricky than physical rituals to tackle like hand washing.? I am beginning to wonder if this is because the therapist doesn't really know how to treat obsessive thinking.? I seem to remember over the years of others with great therapists talking about ERP for obsessive thought with out ritual.? His current tactic is using CBT, for my son to try and catch himself before the o > > bsessive negative thoughts overwhelm him, and try to think of a different way he can look at a situation. My son is usually triggered by feeling he is being treated unfairly, or by feeling he doesn't have enough time.? Seems like there ought to be some ERP for this, but I don't know what it is!!!? He is also talks about trying to get my son to tolerate " discomfort " produced by his anxiety,but not in a concrete way.? > > Sorry this post is so long.? I guess I have been storing it up. I know you all alone know the fear and grief I am experiencing.? It sort of feels like finding out the cancer you thought was in remission is now back, and you have to go through another round of chemo, only hoping that things will turn out better this time, but not ever knowing... > > - in MI > > > > > > > > -- > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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