son falling apart

[Guest guest]

I have so much to write I don't even know where to start, except to say that I

know of no one personally who understands what it's really like to parent an OCD

child, and reading the posts on this list daily provides immense comfort that

people exist out there who really DO understand.? So I thank each and every one

of you profusely for posting and responding while I lurk, because I feel oh so

less alone in all this.

Xmas break has been hell.? My son (13) has been on a downward spiral since the

week before xmas and its going from bad to worse.? The pdoc took him off of his

Abilify due to the side effects (voracious appetite and bedwetting).? The first

week off, he became depressed and withdrawn, refusing to do school work and

obsessing constantly about what he might or might not be getting for christmas.?

We were worried, so filled the prescription for Inderal we were given.? Things

went from bad to worse, with daily meltdowns, property destruction, verbal abuse

and last night, physically attacking me.? The pdoc agreed to put him back on the

Abilify (he is also on 50 mg of Celexa) and it is my one last glimmer of hope

that this will put him back on track.? Meanwhile, I am scared out of my mind for

him, our family is being traumatized daily.? His 10 year old brother (not OCD)

pulled a knife on him last week and had a breakdown afterwards because he can't

take living with his brother's OCD and the chaos it causes our family.? We are

looking for a therapist for him.? My OCD son's therapist keeps reminding me that

the rough spots do smooth out...But what I remember is how bad they can get.?

This time last year my son developed panic attacks at school, which eventually

resulted in school refusal, a major depressive episode, and 2 hopitalizations.??

To his credit, the current therapist got my son back on track to finish out the

school year, and my son has not only missed zero days of 7th grade, but got on

the honor role last term.? But now he keeps saying that my son's OCD is mostly

internal obsessive thought that is difficult to access and treat, and much more

tricky than physical rituals to tackle like hand washing.? I am beginning to

wonder if this is because the therapist doesn't really know how to treat

obsessive thinking.? I seem to remember over the years of others with great

therapists talking about ERP for obsessive thought with out ritual.? His current

tactic is using CBT, for my son to try and catch himself before the o

bsessive negative thoughts overwhelm him, and try to think of a different way he

can look at a situation. My son is usually triggered by feeling he is being

treated unfairly, or by feeling he doesn't have enough time.? Seems like there

ought to be some ERP for this, but I don't know what it is!!!? He is also talks

about trying to get my son to tolerate " discomfort " produced by his anxiety,but

not in a concrete way.?

Sorry this post is so long.? I guess I have been storing it up. I know you all

alone know the fear and grief I am experiencing.? It sort of feels like finding

out the cancer you thought was in remission is now back, and you have to go

through another round of chemo, only hoping that things will turn out better

this time, but not ever knowing...

- in MI

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