Re: Another Little Victory

[Guest guest]

Three cheers for Kate!!

Another Little Victory

Kate (9 yrs) used to love to spend the night at Grandma & Grandpa's house . . .

but that all changed last spring. We never did figure out the reason but right

about bedtime her anxiety level would sky-rocket and she would beg to go home to

sleep. Then she'd be so embarassed and upset because, " If I go home, Grandma

will think I don't like it here! " She was so torn between the fear (of

something happening to me and her dad if she wasn't with us) vs. the

embarassment of, once again, " chickening out. "

Last night she licked it! I offered to leave her my watch (something that I

would miss so she'd know I was thinking of her) which she was eager to accept.

At bedtime, though, she bravely decided she didn't need my watch, " But could you

wait until I'm asleep to go home? " So we did that. She had some trouble

getting to sleep but she didn't cry and she didn't chicken out which is huge.

Hopefully this victory will be a big boost to her confidence and she'll be able

to do it with less anxiety next time (which we'll try to do soon to keep the

momentum going). In January her best friend wants to have a sleepover party for

her 9th birthday and Kate wants so badly to=2

0do it. She's motivated to do her " practice sleepovers " and we're hoping make

the friend's party a " reward " for her rather than an embarassing anxious time.

Beth

[Guest guest]

Congrats to both you and Kate for working this through!!! Sleepovers

can be hard for so many reasons for these kids. Here to more

successes on this, with the final one the birthday sleepover!

Each " victory " builds on the other and so empowers them. We are

seeing this with ours too. He has difficulty with social gatherings

and had a big outburst before going to one recently, almost did not

go, then as we came home after and he had made it through, even

though it was difficult, he said he was glad he made himself go. Now

we can remind him of this for next time when he " feels " he can't, the

payoff only comes with pushing yourself.

So happy for you Beth!

Hugs!

Barb

>

> Kate (9 yrs) used to love to spend the night at Grandma & Grandpa's

house . . . but that all changed last spring. We never did figure

out the reason but right about bedtime her anxiety level would sky-

rocket and she would beg to go home to sleep. Then she'd be so

embarassed and upset because, " If I go home, Grandma will think I

don't like it here! " She was so torn between the fear (of something

happening to me and her dad if she wasn't with us) vs. the

embarassment of, once again, " chickening out. "

>

> Last night she licked it! I offered to leave her my watch

(something that I would miss so she'd know I was thinking of her)

which she was eager to accept. At bedtime, though, she bravely

decided she didn't need my watch, " But could you wait until I'm

asleep to go home? " So we did that. She had some trouble getting to

sleep but she didn't cry and she didn't chicken out which is huge.

>

> Hopefully this victory will be a big boost to her confidence and

she'll be able to do it with less anxiety next time (which we'll try

to do soon to keep the momentum going). In January her best friend

wants to have a sleepover party for her 9th birthday and Kate wants

so badly to do it. She's motivated to do her " practice sleepovers "

and we're hoping make the friend's party a " reward " for her rather

than an embarassing anxious time.

>

> Beth

>

>