New member

[Guest guest]

Good Morning,

I am fairly new to the group, mostly have just been reading your

emails and identifying with what many of you are sharing. I love the

candid discussions, they have given me the feeling of safety and

sharing. I feel very fortunate to be part of this.

I have struggled a lifetime with weight issues and have found myself

yet again, gaining a few pounds. In listening to the podcasts and

reading your emails I am able to identify some of my behaviors and

motivations for overeating. At this point I am writing a log of my

food consumption and my hunger level....a back to basics approach.

What am I eating, when am I eating it and when do I start eating and

when do I stop eating.

One thing I would like to share is a dream I had (I am a vivid

dreamer). I saw a woman who was very obese stuffed into a booth in a

Chinese restaurant. Red leather booth with red chrome table. She had

just consumed a huge meal and was refusing to pay for it. Several

people were trying to pull her from the booth and she was resisting,

crying and demanding more food. Her name was Katheryn, her hair was

thick, blond/grey and she would have been in her 50's. They were

going to take her for surgery to reduce her stomach. They removed her

from the restaurant and as I was paying for my take-out order she ran

back in, opened the bag with my food, opened a container and stuffed

her face into the food and began eating. Several people had to pull

her away.

During this dream I was observing only, neither helping or harming

her. When I woke I saw her hunger as compulsive, obsessive, self-

damaging and the full expression of a food glutton. This is my away

from motivation, a rather horrendous picture of what I do not want to

become, but I have embraced Katheryn for that gift of allowing me to

see so clearly what it is I do not want to be. I did a little lucid

dreaming and took Katheryn in my arms, fed her slowly, allowed her to

savor the food and the loving comfort of my arms. I thanked her, told

her she was courageous and a blessing and left with her to face my

day. Last night when I was preparing a meal and started to eat, I

asked myself if this was Katheryn eating or me. Was I making a clear

choice or a clouded one? I think I will enjoy working with this dream

and how I interrpret it and use it while on this journey with IOWL.

Many thanks to all of those sharing their journey.....you have

inspired me to share mine.

Have a beautiful day