Guest guest Posted August 21, 1999 Report Share Posted August 21, 1999 Carol, Hello, I just joined this group. It seems to be a great group. I have had some bad experiences and am searching for new groups and have even started a new one of my own. For those of you who don't know me, I am a 34 year old married mother of three boys. I am a nurse, but I am not currently working outside the home due to my health problems. I do look in on an elderly neighbor and help her with her medications and some meals. This helps me feel like my skills are not going to waste and makes me feel useful. I enjoy raising my children, but there is no immediate payback from that most of the time. I often feel unappreciated when it comes to my children. I was diagnosed with fms 6 1/2 years ago. I have since been diagnosed with cfs, ibs, and mcs. I also have severe food and drug allergies that seem to be related to the fms. I hope to get to know all of you. Gentle hugs, Fern Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 1999 Report Share Posted August 22, 1999 Welcome to the list, Fern! Many of us do understand what it is like to be " trapped " at home with chronic pain and chronic illness. One thing I've discovered with my children (three grown and married, but I have a ten year old still at home, and four grandchildren) is that if I appreciate them by saying thank you when they do something...like empty the dishwasher or wiping off the kitchen counters...they are more likely to say thank you to me when I do something for them. I used to complain...loudly...that no one appreciated everything I did around the house. Just ended up with them defending themselves and arguing with me. The attempt to be as kind and tolerant of my family as I try to be of others is reaping lots of kind acts, tender responses, and real appreciation. Just a thought. Ray Re: Carol/Introduction > > > Carol, > > Hello, I just joined this group. It seems to be a great group. I have had > some bad experiences and am searching for new groups and have even started a > new one of my own. > > For those of you who don't know me, I am a 34 year old married mother of > three boys. I am a nurse, but I am not currently working outside the home > due to my health problems. I do look in on an elderly neighbor and help > her with her medications and some meals. This helps me feel like my skills > are not going to waste and makes me feel useful. I enjoy raising my > children, but there is no immediate payback from that most of the time. I > often feel unappreciated when it comes to my children. > > I was diagnosed with fms 6 1/2 years ago. I have since been diagnosed with > cfs, ibs, and mcs. I also have severe food and drug allergies that seem to > be related to the fms. > > I hope to get to know all of you. > > Gentle hugs, > Fern > > > --------------------------- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 1999 Report Share Posted August 22, 1999 Hi Fern, I, for one, am glad I have a place to go to where I can meet some nice folks and maybe learn how to " live " with pain. One question comes to mind in reading your post...what does cfs, ibs and mcs stand for...I'd guess cfs would be Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, IBS..Irritable Bowel Syndrome..msc ??? muscle problem??? fms..maybe a nerve problem??? Just guessing... How old are your boys? Three boys..my identical twin has three boys. Now all grown up and two are married. I have two adopted children..now grown up too. In fact I'm extremely worried about my son in Chorpus Christie facing hurricane Bret. He call this morning at 10:30 stating they were heading out towards San..I feel they made the move too late!! The roads will be a parking lot. They have two little ones..girls. One age 3 and one age 6...I'm so worried right now!! He said they'd call when they got somewhere...I think he will have to use the mobil phone because he'll be on a road somewhere. Hope you are having a good day..nice of you to helpout an elderly lady...I have a lady across the street, bedridden for about five years now,that I try to visit with too. God Bless! K. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 1999 Report Share Posted August 22, 1999 In a message dated 8/22/99 3:01:32 PM Eastern Daylight Time, maryk@... writes: << In fact I'm extremely worried about my son in Chorpus Christie facing hurricane Bret. He call this morning at 10:30 stating they were heading out towards San..I feel they made the move too late!! >> K: Hope you have heard from your son by now and he and his family are out of harm's way. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. {{{and pain-free wishes}}} Carol ICQ #14061790 " In the little decisions of life, follow your mind; in the big decisions of life, follow your heart. " (author unknown) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 1999 Report Share Posted August 22, 1999 Hi ____hope this finds u all in not too much pain___I have IBS and that is a dysfuntion of the lower intestine of the bowel which can cause considerable pain and I take meds for it_____I am having surgery on a RSD foot tomorrow___so I sure need some prayers my way _it is only day surgery but if it is not done right it can retrigger the RSD full-blown and I would never get better again as too many blocks were done on me and that is that____wishing u al well and painfreed days and nights....Peace Jazz Jazz________Canada~~~ Health, Peace and Dreams____ 1cq # is 11808881 add me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 1999 Report Share Posted August 22, 1999 Hi Jazz, Prayers (and prayers for courage) are sent your way. What kind of surgery are you having on you foot? I have heard of RSD before but, when you are feeling better, maybe you can enlighten me. Is it where the nerves burn when going into your foot or, in my case, burn from the thigh down to the foot? Good luck and get back to us and let us know how everything is going. God Bless! K. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 1999 Report Share Posted August 22, 1999 May yoiur son be SAFE_____and make it to a safe destination _JAZZ At 09:20 PM 22/08/99 EDT, you wrote: >From: MsVVarrior@... > >In a message dated 8/22/99 3:01:32 PM Eastern Daylight Time, >maryk@... writes: > ><< In fact I'm extremely worried about my son in Chorpus Christie facing > hurricane Bret. He call this morning at 10:30 stating they were heading out > towards San..I feel they made the move too late!! >> > Jazz________Canada~~~ Health, Peace and Dreams____ 1cq # is 11808881 add me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 Lets see how cclose my guess is on the mysterious (MCS) Myofacial Cerfalgia Syndrome?????????? Muscular Tension Headach Syndrome?????????? J. & The Hounds of Hoopeston jkeith@... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 Ray, thanks for this post. It's something I need to try. I too seem to always be saying " I'm not the maid!! " And I get angry that my husband and child don't pick up etc. I'll try your method, cuz mine is not working. Thanks Kathleen in Ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 Ray, thanks for this post. It's something I need to try. I too seem to always be saying " I'm not the maid!! " And I get angry that my husband and child don't pick up etc. I'll try your method, cuz mine is not working. Thanks Kathleen in Ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 ----- > > Lets see how cclose my guess is on the mysterious (MCS) Multiple chemical sensitivities Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 ----- > > Lets see how cclose my guess is on the mysterious (MCS) Multiple chemical sensitivities Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 Kathleen, I hope your attempt at giving kindness to your family works as well as it has for me. One tremendous benefit, that I have observed, is the lowering of stress levels in our home. Yelling at everyone, " I'm not the maid! " was exactly what I was doing, too! It produced great stress for me, and terrible stress for my family. When I began using a kind word instead of a cross one, and concentrated on being polite (saying " Thank You, " and " Please. " ),as well as asking carefully worded requests (Could you, please, take your books and toys to your room? " ) my family's response was a little bit on the shocked side of things. It resulted in a contagious polite-fest! I probably said this before (I can't remember. LOL!), but I will not be defined by my diseases! Demanding exact behavior in a belligerent fashion was talking out of the pain. When I realized this ( Darwent has gently pointed this out to me previously. Thank you, !) I was both appalled and grief-stricken that I would let my diseases and pain hurt my family. I can't guarantee that you will suddenly reverse the way you are handling the pain overnight. It will probably be a course of ups and downs, until you get enough " practice " to make the responses to your family's behavior a consistent behavior pattern. However, I must say, that you will be overwhelming pleased with the change in yourself, and the wonderful change your family will undergo. I am much calmer and much less stress ridden. Good luck! Ray > > Ray, > thanks for this post. It's something I need to try. I too seem to always be > saying " I'm not the maid!! " And I get angry that my husband and child don't > pick up etc. I'll try your method, cuz mine is not working. > Thanks > Kathleen in Ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 Kathleen, I hope your attempt at giving kindness to your family works as well as it has for me. One tremendous benefit, that I have observed, is the lowering of stress levels in our home. Yelling at everyone, " I'm not the maid! " was exactly what I was doing, too! It produced great stress for me, and terrible stress for my family. When I began using a kind word instead of a cross one, and concentrated on being polite (saying " Thank You, " and " Please. " ),as well as asking carefully worded requests (Could you, please, take your books and toys to your room? " ) my family's response was a little bit on the shocked side of things. It resulted in a contagious polite-fest! I probably said this before (I can't remember. LOL!), but I will not be defined by my diseases! Demanding exact behavior in a belligerent fashion was talking out of the pain. When I realized this ( Darwent has gently pointed this out to me previously. Thank you, !) I was both appalled and grief-stricken that I would let my diseases and pain hurt my family. I can't guarantee that you will suddenly reverse the way you are handling the pain overnight. It will probably be a course of ups and downs, until you get enough " practice " to make the responses to your family's behavior a consistent behavior pattern. However, I must say, that you will be overwhelming pleased with the change in yourself, and the wonderful change your family will undergo. I am much calmer and much less stress ridden. Good luck! Ray > > Ray, > thanks for this post. It's something I need to try. I too seem to always be > saying " I'm not the maid!! " And I get angry that my husband and child don't > pick up etc. I'll try your method, cuz mine is not working. > Thanks > Kathleen in Ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 23, 1999 Report Share Posted August 23, 1999 Hi , At 07:24 PM 8/22/99 -0500, you wrote: >? I have heard of RSD before but, when you are >feeling better, maybe you can enlighten me. Is it where the nerves burn when >going into your foot or, in my case, burn from the thigh down to the foot? For someone who just heard about RSD, you seem to be pretty quick to come up with RSD symptoms. It does sound like you have got at least one. But with arthritic like conditions (I would include FMS (another winning number) in this too, because the RSD / rheumatoid arthritis (and some osteo arthritis) / FMS & perhaps some other diagnoses can account for some similar symptoms. It is probably difficult to distinguish differences in some cases. I am sure that there must be people around who are misdiagnosed, but it does not necessarily matter, since often treatment is the same (for the symptoms). What counts is dealing with them and getting care that helps. Ken ---------- Turbin | Mailto:kturbin@... | webmaster@... Net Biz Development | *Page me: http://www.mirabilis.com/17198172 Tel. (702) 312- 6888 | Fax | GetICQ http://www.icq.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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