Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 -Sara, Would these be done for individual children with specific needs ,or are they just for the mainstream ?Should the teacher have some sort of plan of what she hopes Katy will learn in the lesson or is this just left to the TA to differentiate ? Thanks Sharon . -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe , Sara Moroza- wrote: > > just one little comment: > Teachers do not have to keep records of lesson plans and mine were often > scraps of paper or scribbles in my teacher's planner that noone else > would understand. This is because they have to be flexible and scribbled > on and altered according to a million variables. What we do have to have > and show you are 'schemes of work'. Teachers make their lesson plans > using the schemes of work and those will include sample lesson plans > from which you make the real ones. Ask for those, > Sara > > Eva family wrote: > > > > I would take very careful notes of EXACTLY what they say. Write down > > your own views before the meeting and take careful minutes both of what > > is said and agreed outcomes. Give them your record and ask them to say > > whether they agree that it is accurate. Katy should be getting homework. > > You can ask for it -- if they don't provide it then it that is falling > > short of Katy's entitlements. If they do provide it then it will enable > > you to guage what she is doing in school (and be duly appalled). You > > should of course have targets. They should have lesson plans. You can > > ask to see these. Look at her timetable and ask for the lesson plans for > > Maths (for instance). Edith's school only did lesson plans for National > > Curriculum subjects. Non NC subjects made up about a fifth of the > > timetable. A lesson plan is a fairly fundamental requirement. Ask how > > they plan the PSHE, how they ensure progress (that's a very useful > > phrase, no one can deny the need to ensure progress) in sport. > > > > Make sure that you document all your concerns. Be careful not to arrive > > at a point where they can say " We didn't realise Mrs soandso was > > concerned about this " . If you feel her TA is not up to scratch, inquire > > about her training, ask for her to receive further training and if she > > doesn't improve ask for her to be replaced. If you find it hard to > > document everything, take a witness. They will probably offer you > > excuses -- write them down because that means they are accepting your > > criticism. > > > > Vicky's point about the child's life passing is why we decided to home > > educate. It's hard to feel confident that any alternative will be > > better, particularly as you initially chose this one. I also found the > > argument very wearing and the school very damaging. Not only does the > > child forget what it has been taught and previously knew, it also > > copies/develops bad habits and falls into unhelpful behaviours that are > > permitted in school. I said some of this to a SW who came to assess > > Edith. She said " A lot of parents say that " . > > > > It is possible to find social contacts for Katy outside school. These > > will not necessarily be better behaved but they will behave in ways that > > are more usual and which it is helpful to get used to. In the outside > > world Edith has to practice taking her turn for instance. In sp school > > the boys went first because otherwise they hit you. That's true of a > > certain sort of boy in the outside world, of course, but not of all of > > them. > > > > I don't envy you or Vicky. I wouldn't go back into this sort of stress > > for worlds. > > > > xx Sally > > > > Sharon wrote: > > > > > > -Thanks for your support Vicky.I read your earlier posts and > > > understand that this could push anyone into a breakdown,especially > > > the length of time you have been going through this. > > > > > > For Katy's last 3yrs at Primary she had a great TA and I do realise > > > how lucky we were.The school she has just started I thought would be > > > great.I really thought as there was an autism specific resource there > > > she would get good support .She's having 1-1 ,but it's poor > > > quality.Some of them don't seem to have a clue ! > > > > > > I've got quite a bit of evidence collected already.They more or less > > > admitted that not all TA's were equal.We are going to write again > > > this week, now we have had time to digest what was said at the > > > meeting and the report they have given us,and request to speak again > > > in a month to discuss provision. > > > > > > Good luck with your meeting. > > > > > > >From reading what you have said with regard to special schools ,I am > > > wondering if there is adequate provision out there. > > > Oh, for us all to live nearer and set up our own community with > > > schools and support. > > > > > > Take care, > > > Sharon.x > > > > > > -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe > > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com> > > > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com>, MaddiganV@ > > wrote: > > > > > > > > So sorry to hear this Sharon, but not really surprised as it is a > > > typical > > > > story sadly. > > > > I can really relate to your lack of confidence in them as the > > > action plan > > > > is all your suggestions, we have a meeting tomorrow at s school > > > to draw > > > > up a communication strategy and again it is looking as though they > > > are bereft > > > > of ideas themselves. > > > > You don't automatically get to choose whichever school you want > > > with a > > > > statement, if only. > > > > I am going to use all s test results to push again for the > > > school we > > > > originally wanted, medical evidence is the best imo. > > > > What I can say with the benefit of hindsight is the earlier you get > > > this > > > > whole school issue sorted out the better, that may well mean lots > > > of evidence, > > > > don't get caught up in a cycle of meetings as I did, they almost > > > all end up > > > > with empty promises and nothing concrete. > > > > It's your childs precious time they are wasting and believe me my > > > oldest is > > > > 13 and it just seems like yesterday we began this awful journey of > > > meetings, > > > > meetings and more meetings to find ourselves no further on than > > > when he was > > > > five. > > > > Good luck > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------- > > > > > > > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > > > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com <http://www.avg.com> > > > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: > > 09/11/2008 14:14 > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 Vicky, We will write today,asking for copies of the action plan and measurable targets. Really I have little confidence that with all the plans in the world some of these TA's can deliver,but you have to go through the process.If only Katy's TA from Primary could support her,I know she would have a better chance. We totally agree about parents being given the money to educate our children. How you keep yourself stress free during these times ,I don't know .I'm aware that my stress is having a bad effect on our family life and I'm trying my hardest to hide it.This is causing more stress as I am worrying about the effects on Katy and the rest of our family. All the best today with your meeting, Sharon. > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent regarding the > stress around schools. > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as stress free as > possible in order to be around for our children as long as possible. > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not really an > option, or in our case having more than one child who is disabled coupled with the > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my son the > education he needs. > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly trained and have > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I only know what > not to do. > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get then we > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing around wasting our > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the expertise to educate. > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get caught up in a > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, they are being > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, it's all the > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining nothing. > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount of meetings, > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have been avoiding for > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings themselves a big > source of stress. > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in writing, keep > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them know you want > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all these > meetings. > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to work and that > is just plain ridiculous. > Vicky > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 Sorry, only know about main stream but I'm pretty sure about the lesson plans. Schemes of work go with the National Curriculum and show how it is broken down. Sara Sharon wrote: > > -Sara, > > Would these be done for individual children with specific needs ,or > are they just for the mainstream ?Should the teacher have some sort > of plan of what she hopes Katy will learn in the lesson or is this > just left to the TA to differentiate ? > > Thanks Sharon . > > -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com>, Sara Moroza- > wrote: > > > > just one little comment: > > Teachers do not have to keep records of lesson plans and mine were > often > > scraps of paper or scribbles in my teacher's planner that noone > else > > would understand. This is because they have to be flexible and > scribbled > > on and altered according to a million variables. What we do have to > have > > and show you are 'schemes of work'. Teachers make their lesson > plans > > using the schemes of work and those will include sample lesson > plans > > from which you make the real ones. Ask for those, > > Sara > > > > Eva family wrote: > > > > > > I would take very careful notes of EXACTLY what they say. Write > down > > > your own views before the meeting and take careful minutes both > of what > > > is said and agreed outcomes. Give them your record and ask them > to say > > > whether they agree that it is accurate. Katy should be getting > homework. > > > You can ask for it -- if they don't provide it then it that is > falling > > > short of Katy's entitlements. If they do provide it then it will > enable > > > you to guage what she is doing in school (and be duly appalled). > You > > > should of course have targets. They should have lesson plans. You > can > > > ask to see these. Look at her timetable and ask for the lesson > plans for > > > Maths (for instance). Edith's school only did lesson plans for > National > > > Curriculum subjects. Non NC subjects made up about a fifth of the > > > timetable. A lesson plan is a fairly fundamental requirement. Ask > how > > > they plan the PSHE, how they ensure progress (that's a very useful > > > phrase, no one can deny the need to ensure progress) in sport. > > > > > > Make sure that you document all your concerns. Be careful not to > arrive > > > at a point where they can say " We didn't realise Mrs soandso was > > > concerned about this " . If you feel her TA is not up to scratch, > inquire > > > about her training, ask for her to receive further training and > if she > > > doesn't improve ask for her to be replaced. If you find it hard to > > > document everything, take a witness. They will probably offer you > > > excuses -- write them down because that means they are accepting > your > > > criticism. > > > > > > Vicky's point about the child's life passing is why we decided to > home > > > educate. It's hard to feel confident that any alternative will be > > > better, particularly as you initially chose this one. I also > found the > > > argument very wearing and the school very damaging. Not only does > the > > > child forget what it has been taught and previously knew, it also > > > copies/develops bad habits and falls into unhelpful behaviours > that are > > > permitted in school. I said some of this to a SW who came to > assess > > > Edith. She said " A lot of parents say that " . > > > > > > It is possible to find social contacts for Katy outside school. > These > > > will not necessarily be better behaved but they will behave in > ways that > > > are more usual and which it is helpful to get used to. In the > outside > > > world Edith has to practice taking her turn for instance. In sp > school > > > the boys went first because otherwise they hit you. That's true > of a > > > certain sort of boy in the outside world, of course, but not of > all of > > > them. > > > > > > I don't envy you or Vicky. I wouldn't go back into this sort of > stress > > > for worlds. > > > > > > xx Sally > > > > > > Sharon wrote: > > > > > > > > -Thanks for your support Vicky.I read your earlier posts and > > > > understand that this could push anyone into a > breakdown,especially > > > > the length of time you have been going through this. > > > > > > > > For Katy's last 3yrs at Primary she had a great TA and I do > realise > > > > how lucky we were.The school she has just started I thought > would be > > > > great.I really thought as there was an autism specific resource > there > > > > she would get good support .She's having 1-1 ,but it's poor > > > > quality.Some of them don't seem to have a clue ! > > > > > > > > I've got quite a bit of evidence collected already.They more or > less > > > > admitted that not all TA's were equal.We are going to write > again > > > > this week, now we have had time to digest what was said at the > > > > meeting and the report they have given us,and request to speak > again > > > > in a month to discuss provision. > > > > > > > > Good luck with your meeting. > > > > > > > > >From reading what you have said with regard to special > schools ,I am > > > > wondering if there is adequate provision out there. > > > > Oh, for us all to live nearer and set up our own community with > > > > schools and support. > > > > > > > > Take care, > > > > Sharon.x > > > > > > > > -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com> > > > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com> > > > > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com>, MaddiganV@ > > > wrote: > > > > > > > > > > So sorry to hear this Sharon, but not really surprised as it > is a > > > > typical > > > > > story sadly. > > > > > I can really relate to your lack of confidence in them as the > > > > action plan > > > > > is all your suggestions, we have a meeting tomorrow at s > school > > > > to draw > > > > > up a communication strategy and again it is looking as though > they > > > > are bereft > > > > > of ideas themselves. > > > > > You don't automatically get to choose whichever school you > want > > > > with a > > > > > statement, if only. > > > > > I am going to use all s test results to push again for > the > > > > school we > > > > > originally wanted, medical evidence is the best imo. > > > > > What I can say with the benefit of hindsight is the earlier > you get > > > > this > > > > > whole school issue sorted out the better, that may well mean > lots > > > > of evidence, > > > > > don't get caught up in a cycle of meetings as I did, they > almost > > > > all end up > > > > > with empty promises and nothing concrete. > > > > > It's your childs precious time they are wasting and believe > me my > > > > oldest is > > > > > 13 and it just seems like yesterday we began this awful > journey of > > > > meetings, > > > > > meetings and more meetings to find ourselves no further on > than > > > > when he was > > > > > five. > > > > > Good luck > > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------- > > > > > > > > > > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > > > > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com <http://www.avg.com> > <http://www.avg.com <http://www.avg.com>> > > > > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: > > > 09/11/2008 14:14 > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 I have just been through all this too Sharon and do not have the best answer in the world but ... We are doing RDI which is meant to be therapist free but i just couldn't manage so I now have somebody coming in to do some of the RDI for me. This is a great compromise because she is there under my nose, I train her, I choose her and I think she's great and very good for Tom anyway. I will try to move away from lots of short sessions (which is what I was used to having done ABA/ VB) to a couple of really long ones and give myself a proper break sometimes. RDI is a relatively stress-free therapy too (having done ABA and VB) so this compromise works pretty well for me at the moment. It does help that I have moved house and Swansea LEA are SOOOO much better than Plymouth LEA who were the pits. Swansea just handed over the money. They even asked if I wanted it before I asked them! Don't know if that helps but I really sympathise and if I can help in anyway, please just ask, Sara x > Vicky, > > We will write today,asking for copies of the action plan and > measurable targets. > > Really I have little confidence that with all the plans in the world > some of these TA's can deliver,but you have to go through the > process.If only Katy's TA from Primary could support her,I know she > would have a better chance. > > We totally agree about parents being given the money to educate our > children. > How you keep yourself stress free during these times ,I don't > know .I'm aware that my stress is having a bad effect on our family > life and I'm trying my hardest to hide it.This is causing more stress > as I am worrying about the effects on Katy and the rest of our family. > > All the best today with your meeting, > Sharon. > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > regarding the > > stress around schools. > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > stress free as > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > possible. > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not really > an > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is disabled > coupled with the > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my son > the > > education he needs. > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly trained > and have > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I only > know what > > not to do. > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get > then we > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing around > wasting our > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > expertise to educate. > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get caught up > in a > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, > they are being > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, it's > all the > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining nothing. > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount of > meetings, > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have been > avoiding for > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings themselves > a big > > source of stress. > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > writing, keep > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them > know you want > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all > these > > meetings. > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to work > and that > > is just plain ridiculous. > > Vicky > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 Age 12/13 is a horrible age. The normals are all vile to each other. Having said that schools can make a difference to that and arrange kindness in small groups. But children don't want to be known as the ones with peculiar friends Sally Sharon wrote: > > Thanks Sara, > > What ever happens ,if it's any sort of home programme I think it will > have to be me providing the main of it.We are just very broke > financially at the moment.At least with my job I can work weekends > and unsocial hours ,so I could be available during the day to help > Katy. > Really all that needs to happen is for her to have appropriate > support in school,then I can sleep at night.She wants to be in school > and amongst other children,but for how long they will respect her if > they see she cannot achieve I don't know. > > Sharon. > > > > > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > > > regarding the > > > > stress around schools. > > > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > > > stress free as > > > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > > > possible. > > > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not > really > > > an > > > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is > disabled > > > coupled with the > > > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my > son > > > the > > > > education he needs. > > > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly > trained > > > and have > > > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I > only > > > know what > > > > not to do. > > > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get > > > then we > > > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing > around > > > wasting our > > > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > > > expertise to educate. > > > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get > caught up > > > in a > > > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, > > > they are being > > > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, > it's > > > all the > > > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining > nothing. > > > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount > of > > > meetings, > > > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have > been > > > avoiding for > > > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings > themselves > > > a big > > > > source of stress. > > > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > > > writing, keep > > > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them > > > know you want > > > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all > > > these > > > > meetings. > > > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to > work > > > and that > > > > is just plain ridiculous. > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: 09/11/2008 14:14 > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 Age 12/13 is a horrible age. The normals are all vile to each other. Having said that schools can make a difference to that and arrange kindness in small groups. But children don't want to be known as the ones with peculiar friends Sally Sharon wrote: > > Thanks Sara, > > What ever happens ,if it's any sort of home programme I think it will > have to be me providing the main of it.We are just very broke > financially at the moment.At least with my job I can work weekends > and unsocial hours ,so I could be available during the day to help > Katy. > Really all that needs to happen is for her to have appropriate > support in school,then I can sleep at night.She wants to be in school > and amongst other children,but for how long they will respect her if > they see she cannot achieve I don't know. > > Sharon. > > > > > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > > > regarding the > > > > stress around schools. > > > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > > > stress free as > > > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > > > possible. > > > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not > really > > > an > > > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is > disabled > > > coupled with the > > > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my > son > > > the > > > > education he needs. > > > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly > trained > > > and have > > > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I > only > > > know what > > > > not to do. > > > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get > > > then we > > > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing > around > > > wasting our > > > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > > > expertise to educate. > > > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get > caught up > > > in a > > > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, > > > they are being > > > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, > it's > > > all the > > > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining > nothing. > > > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount > of > > > meetings, > > > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have > been > > > avoiding for > > > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings > themselves > > > a big > > > > source of stress. > > > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > > > writing, keep > > > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them > > > know you want > > > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all > > > these > > > > meetings. > > > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to > work > > > and that > > > > is just plain ridiculous. > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: 09/11/2008 14:14 > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 -I've got to get them to realise that they need training first. has said to me she would go into the school,but feels they would think she is just a know it all.I will push for this ,as it seems such a sensible thing to do.If i was the TA I'd welcome it. Sharon -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe , Mum231ASD@... wrote: > > > In a message dated 10/11/2008 11:47:07 GMT Standard Time, > bill.molineux@... writes: > > her old TA came to the meeting on Friday and offered to help,but > it wasn't taken up.Perhaps we should try again.The SENCO and key worker > saw her working in Primary and I feel these are the best with her,they > have seen her interacting and achieving,the other TA's have not. > > > > > >>Get pointed about how and who is going to provide these TA's with > training. YOu and were offering the best they can get, their attitude is > bizzare. Also ring LEa and ak what training course they have available for TA's > supporting ASD kids. Probably nothing, which brings us right back to you and > . > > Mandi x > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 -I've got to get them to realise that they need training first. has said to me she would go into the school,but feels they would think she is just a know it all.I will push for this ,as it seems such a sensible thing to do.If i was the TA I'd welcome it. Sharon -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe , Mum231ASD@... wrote: > > > In a message dated 10/11/2008 11:47:07 GMT Standard Time, > bill.molineux@... writes: > > her old TA came to the meeting on Friday and offered to help,but > it wasn't taken up.Perhaps we should try again.The SENCO and key worker > saw her working in Primary and I feel these are the best with her,they > have seen her interacting and achieving,the other TA's have not. > > > > > >>Get pointed about how and who is going to provide these TA's with > training. YOu and were offering the best they can get, their attitude is > bizzare. Also ring LEa and ak what training course they have available for TA's > supporting ASD kids. Probably nothing, which brings us right back to you and > . > > Mandi x > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 -They have set up a circle of friends.Langauge is a huge problem for Katy,I haven't recieved an answer yet on how this and interaction is supported . In her old school the kids and Katy had little prompt cards which Katy could read to help her with a sort of conversation.They have had these passed onto them before she started .I suggested they use them. Just want to say,you have all really helped me today.You have lifted me from a very worried state and given me directions. Thankyou all so much !! Sharon xx -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe , Eva family wrote: > > Age 12/13 is a horrible age. The normals are all vile to each other. > Having said that schools can make a difference to that and arrange > kindness in small groups. But children don't want to be known as the > ones with peculiar friends > Sally > > Sharon wrote: > > > > Thanks Sara, > > > > What ever happens ,if it's any sort of home programme I think it will > > have to be me providing the main of it.We are just very broke > > financially at the moment.At least with my job I can work weekends > > and unsocial hours ,so I could be available during the day to help > > Katy. > > Really all that needs to happen is for her to have appropriate > > support in school,then I can sleep at night.She wants to be in school > > and amongst other children,but for how long they will respect her if > > they see she cannot achieve I don't know. > > > > Sharon. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > > > > regarding the > > > > > stress around schools. > > > > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > > > > stress free as > > > > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > > > > possible. > > > > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not > > really > > > > an > > > > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is > > disabled > > > > coupled with the > > > > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my > > son > > > > the > > > > > education he needs. > > > > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly > > trained > > > > and have > > > > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I > > only > > > > know what > > > > > not to do. > > > > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get > > > > then we > > > > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing > > around > > > > wasting our > > > > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > > > > expertise to educate. > > > > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get > > caught up > > > > in a > > > > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, > > > > they are being > > > > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, > > it's > > > > all the > > > > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining > > nothing. > > > > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount > > of > > > > meetings, > > > > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have > > been > > > > avoiding for > > > > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings > > themselves > > > > a big > > > > > source of stress. > > > > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > > > > writing, keep > > > > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them > > > > know you want > > > > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all > > > > these > > > > > meetings. > > > > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to > > work > > > > and that > > > > > is just plain ridiculous. > > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------ ------ > > > > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: 09/11/2008 14:14 > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 -They have set up a circle of friends.Langauge is a huge problem for Katy,I haven't recieved an answer yet on how this and interaction is supported . In her old school the kids and Katy had little prompt cards which Katy could read to help her with a sort of conversation.They have had these passed onto them before she started .I suggested they use them. Just want to say,you have all really helped me today.You have lifted me from a very worried state and given me directions. Thankyou all so much !! Sharon xx -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe , Eva family wrote: > > Age 12/13 is a horrible age. The normals are all vile to each other. > Having said that schools can make a difference to that and arrange > kindness in small groups. But children don't want to be known as the > ones with peculiar friends > Sally > > Sharon wrote: > > > > Thanks Sara, > > > > What ever happens ,if it's any sort of home programme I think it will > > have to be me providing the main of it.We are just very broke > > financially at the moment.At least with my job I can work weekends > > and unsocial hours ,so I could be available during the day to help > > Katy. > > Really all that needs to happen is for her to have appropriate > > support in school,then I can sleep at night.She wants to be in school > > and amongst other children,but for how long they will respect her if > > they see she cannot achieve I don't know. > > > > Sharon. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > > > > regarding the > > > > > stress around schools. > > > > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > > > > stress free as > > > > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > > > > possible. > > > > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not > > really > > > > an > > > > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is > > disabled > > > > coupled with the > > > > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my > > son > > > > the > > > > > education he needs. > > > > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly > > trained > > > > and have > > > > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I > > only > > > > know what > > > > > not to do. > > > > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get > > > > then we > > > > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing > > around > > > > wasting our > > > > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > > > > expertise to educate. > > > > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get > > caught up > > > > in a > > > > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, > > > > they are being > > > > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, > > it's > > > > all the > > > > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining > > nothing. > > > > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount > > of > > > > meetings, > > > > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have > > been > > > > avoiding for > > > > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings > > themselves > > > > a big > > > > > source of stress. > > > > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > > > > writing, keep > > > > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them > > > > know you want > > > > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all > > > > these > > > > > meetings. > > > > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to > > work > > > > and that > > > > > is just plain ridiculous. > > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------ ------ > > > > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: 09/11/2008 14:14 > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 Yes, I hope you get it, Sharon, Sara Sharon wrote: > > Thanks Sara, > > What ever happens ,if it's any sort of home programme I think it will > have to be me providing the main of it.We are just very broke > financially at the moment.At least with my job I can work weekends > and unsocial hours ,so I could be available during the day to help > Katy. > Really all that needs to happen is for her to have appropriate > support in school,then I can sleep at night.She wants to be in school > and amongst other children,but for how long they will respect her if > they see she cannot achieve I don't know. > > Sharon. > > > > > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > > > regarding the > > > > stress around schools. > > > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > > > stress free as > > > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > > > possible. > > > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not > really > > > an > > > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is > disabled > > > coupled with the > > > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give my > son > > > the > > > > education he needs. > > > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly > trained > > > and have > > > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, I > only > > > know what > > > > not to do. > > > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools get > > > then we > > > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing > around > > > wasting our > > > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > > > expertise to educate. > > > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get > caught up > > > in a > > > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't care, > > > they are being > > > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the classroom, > it's > > > all the > > > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining > nothing. > > > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable amount > of > > > meetings, > > > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have > been > > > avoiding for > > > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings > themselves > > > a big > > > > source of stress. > > > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > > > writing, keep > > > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let them > > > know you want > > > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need for all > > > these > > > > meetings. > > > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to > work > > > and that > > > > is just plain ridiculous. > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2008 Report Share Posted November 10, 2008 Edith later met up a child who would have been in secondary school with her if the schools had co-operated. To an impressive extent this teenager (who was effectively excluded from school at the time and remedial in her classes) took loads of responsibility for her, blossomed under the attention and praise for her caringness and told me how horrible most of the other girls in her school would be to Edith if given half a chance (too true I'm sure). So a clever school can use the special children to reach out to others damaged for other reasons and get them to look out for each other, praise all round. But the school has to want to -- and be well-organised enough to do this effectively. Not just pair a special with a psycho and let the psychopath express themselves xxSally Sharon wrote: > > -They have set up a circle of friends.Langauge is a huge problem for > Katy,I haven't recieved an answer yet on how this and interaction is > supported . In her old school the kids and Katy had little prompt > cards which Katy could read to help her with a sort of > conversation.They have had these passed onto them before she > started .I suggested they use them. > > Just want to say,you have all really helped me today.You have lifted > me from a very worried state and given me directions. > > Thankyou all so much !! > > Sharon xx > -- In Autism-Biomedical-Europe > <mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe%40yahoogroups.com>, Eva family > wrote: > > > > Age 12/13 is a horrible age. The normals are all vile to each > other. > > Having said that schools can make a difference to that and arrange > > kindness in small groups. But children don't want to be known as > the > > ones with peculiar friends > > Sally > > > > Sharon wrote: > > > > > > Thanks Sara, > > > > > > What ever happens ,if it's any sort of home programme I think it > will > > > have to be me providing the main of it.We are just very broke > > > financially at the moment.At least with my job I can work weekends > > > and unsocial hours ,so I could be available during the day to help > > > Katy. > > > Really all that needs to happen is for her to have appropriate > > > support in school,then I can sleep at night.She wants to be in > school > > > and amongst other children,but for how long they will respect her > if > > > they see she cannot achieve I don't know. > > > > > > Sharon. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Sally, my husband would consider you a very sensible parent > > > > > regarding the > > > > > > stress around schools. > > > > > > His take on it is, we need to keep ourselves healthy and as > > > > > stress free as > > > > > > possible in order to be around for our children as long as > > > > > possible. > > > > > > The problem though is as is Sharons case home edding is not > > > really > > > > > an > > > > > > option, or in our case having more than one child who is > > > disabled > > > > > coupled with the > > > > > > fact that I struggle to accept that I will be able to give > my > > > son > > > > > the > > > > > > education he needs. > > > > > > The fact that these schools are totally incompetent, badly > > > trained > > > > > and have > > > > > > set the bar so low doesn't make me an expert on what to do, > I > > > only > > > > > know what > > > > > > not to do. > > > > > > If however they would give us parents the money the schools > get > > > > > then we > > > > > > could buy in the people who can do the job and stop messing > > > around > > > > > wasting our > > > > > > childrens time with those who have neither the will or the > > > > > expertise to educate. > > > > > > I really cannot stress enough though to Sharon not to get > > > caught up > > > > > in a > > > > > > never ending wheel of meetings, remember the school don't > care, > > > > > they are being > > > > > > paid whether they are sitting in meetings or in the > classroom, > > > it's > > > > > all the > > > > > > same to them, the losers are the children who are gaining > > > nothing. > > > > > > Sharon with two children I have been in an insufferable > amount > > > of > > > > > meetings, > > > > > > actually have one this morning at 's school which I have > > > been > > > > > avoiding for > > > > > > the longest time, eventually you will find the meetings > > > themselves > > > > > a big > > > > > > source of stress. > > > > > > Get everything in writing, if you need to complain put it in > > > > > writing, keep > > > > > > good records, ask to see your childs school records and let > them > > > > > know you want > > > > > > an action plan that is measurable thus reducing the need > for all > > > > > these > > > > > > meetings. > > > > > > Meetings alone would have made it impossible for me to go to > > > work > > > > > and that > > > > > > is just plain ridiculous. > > > > > > Vicky > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------- > ------ > > > > > > > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > > > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com <http://www.avg.com> > > > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: > 09/11/2008 14:14 > > > > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > Version: 8.0.175 / Virus Database: 270.9.0/1778 - Release Date: 09/11/2008 14:14 > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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