Re: POLITICS - Ethnic adoption was I'm out (was: Disturbing article)

[Guest guest]

Fern,

Am partially with you here. Countries with any of their culture left intact,

unless torn apart by unemployment and war, have more of a family ethic left

than this divorce, me me culture does. For every child from other cultures

that gets a kind,consistent two person adoption experience in this country

there's another child that has to go through divorce, abuse and having no

one of their biological family or culture to turn to then. Blame for any

nonconformity to adoptive culture and parent's ways can go anywhere from the

child being inferior people to unknown trauma before adoption. Diet change

is an issue to future health as we know. In some cases its merely the child

is who he/she was

born to be and they go through life lost in a totally unrelatable

environment. An example is Schweig, an Inuit adopted out to a non Inuit

family http://www.mohicanpress.com/mo05005.html His solution is healing

communities, not tearing them apart or changing them.

Adoptive parents are not always told the true story. Documentary, Finding

Felicia was of a teen girl adopted to the U.S. during the war in Nicaragua.

Adoptive parents were told her parents were dead or gave her up when she was

taken from her mother and father by soldiers. A priest put his life on the

line to reconnect parents with taken children and let their adoptive parents

know the truth. Another story from Canada is of a woman on a Canadian

reserve who was

told when she had a baby in her teens that the baby had died. She was

knocked out for birth. 20 years later on her doorstep was her daughter,

taken for adoption and grandchild. Conditions are not safe and good in some

countries. Tearing children and families out or changing culture through war

or economics in other countries heals nothing. Basic needs are the same

everywhere. How to do it should be a culture's choice.Coming here uneducated

may give more money than there ever was. Are still making minimum wage at

the worst jobs and will have a harder time to ever get beyond the working

poor class.

> If an infant from Cambodia has both biological parents living

> together, why not work to bring the family here as a unit, rather than

> breaking up the family, if your desire truly is to give that child the

> best chance at life?

Wanita

[Guest guest]

I agree Wanita. Adoption isn't guaranteed to turn well; in fact, many

times a child then has twice the hurts and turmoil to deal with.

I've heard similar reports to what you've said here, of babies taken

from parents in third world countries who truly want their children,

and put up for adoption in the States. The adopted parents are led to

believe they are helping to rescue a child, when in fact the child has

been torn from its parents.

That's not to say there are MANY cases where adopting truly does give

a child a chance that they'd never have had otherwise, and gives a

child parents whereas otherwise they'd have had none.

But the success of an adoption is dependent on the same elements as

biological children raised by their own biological parents: the

dedication and commitment of the parents, not only to the child, but

to each other. And I believe strongly that the best even in adoptive

situations is for a child to have a mother and a father, where a child

gets the balance of perspective from both a male and a female in their

own home, and learns things from both genders that they couldn't

possibly learn from just one.

~ Fern

Re: POLITICS - Ethnic adoption was I'm out (was:

Disturbing article)

> Fern,

>

> Am partially with you here. Countries with any of their culture left

intact,

> unless torn apart by unemployment and war, have more of a family

ethic left

> than this divorce, me me culture does. For every child from other

cultures

> that gets a kind,consistent two person adoption experience in this

country

> there's another child that has to go through divorce, abuse and

having no

> one of their biological family or culture to turn to then. Blame for

any

> nonconformity to adoptive culture and parent's ways can go anywhere

from the

> child being inferior people to unknown trauma before adoption. Diet

change

> is an issue to future health as we know. In some cases its merely

the child

> is who he/she was

> born to be and they go through life lost in a totally unrelatable

> environment. An example is Schweig, an Inuit adopted out to a

non Inuit

> family http://www.mohicanpress.com/mo05005.html His solution is

healing

> communities, not tearing them apart or changing them.

> Adoptive parents are not always told the true story. Documentary,

Finding

> Felicia was of a teen girl adopted to the U.S. during the war in

Nicaragua.

> Adoptive parents were told her parents were dead or gave her up when

she was

> taken from her mother and father by soldiers. A priest put his life

on the

> line to reconnect parents with taken children and let their adoptive

parents

> know the truth. Another story from Canada is of a woman on a

Canadian

> reserve who was

> told when she had a baby in her teens that the baby had died. She

was

> knocked out for birth. 20 years later on her doorstep was her

daughter,

> taken for adoption and grandchild. Conditions are not safe and good

in some

> countries. Tearing children and families out or changing culture

through war

> or economics in other countries heals nothing. Basic needs are the

same

> everywhere. How to do it should be a culture's choice.Coming here

uneducated

> may give more money than there ever was. Are still making minimum

wage at

> the worst jobs and will have a harder time to ever get beyond the

working

> poor class.

>

> > If an infant from Cambodia has both biological parents living

> > together, why not work to bring the family here as a unit, rather

than

> > breaking up the family, if your desire truly is to give that child

the

> > best chance at life?

>

> Wanita