Re: A Woman with AS share her thoughts with us...---

January 8, 2008

....

CHildren and adults with Attention Deficit Disorder. I am not

worried about anything. I feel I have the " upper hand " here because

of how much more I am in control of myself than she is in herself.

I think you are you are correct on how Aspies tend to take things too

literally. In 2003, my whole world changed with regard to taking

things literally (this was four years BEFORE I was diagnosed with

Asperger's/ADHD). This group is NOT an appropriate place to be

discussing such things, so e-mail me if you want to know why I

don't. I have an amazing story to share with people on that.

I am AS and know I feel better when I take care of things as quick as

possible. That is why I choose to be proactive, even when I was

diagnosed with Asperger's. When people look at everything from the

standpoint of " having or not having " to do something as opposed

to " choosing or not choosing " to do something, a big difference

exists between having and choosing. One is more active as an action

(I choose to be responsible for learning what I can about Asperger's)

while the other is more passive as an action (I have to be more

responsible for learning what I can about Asperger's). I don't have

to do anything, but I can choose to do anything.

> ....

>

> Thanks Well, if someone came to talk to me about AS on a bus,

it's

> the LAST place I'd want to talk about it. It's no one's business in

> knowing about my personal life unless I choose to make it public.

> That's where I put a boundary, and why I use to word " choose " as

> opposed to " have " . I don't have to do anything, but I choose to do

> something or not.

>

> I had been talking with her online. Unfortunately, she met me on

> this one bus route I had been taking and I had no idea it was her.

> Then, she asked me if I was . I said I was, then she kept

> talking and kept talking and kept talking. I was like, " I know I

> have Asperger's and such, but I don't need for this person to ask

me

> about my life with Asperger's " . I felt it was a very inappropriate

> time for her to talk with me about it. I didn't feel like talking

> about it, number one. Number two, she should have asked me first if

> I wanted to talk about it. If I see her on the bus tomorrow (she

> claims she is going to the local CHADD meeting tomorrow night), I

> will have a discussion with her in private about what took place on

> the bus a week or so ago (and my displeasure about what she did).

>

> Let's just say I am over that episode from a week or so ago.

> However, this person WILL KNOW how I felt about it. I will approach

> this very tactfully. I won't be like a " loose cannon " of sorts.

> Yeah I know about the sun not going down on anger stuff.

>

> Trust me when I say everyone (NT or AS) is better off by cooling

down

> before discussing an issue with someone. That is why I didn't storm

> back at her on the bus and said what I could have.

>

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January 8, 2008

,

You have made an important distinction

and we can all learn from this.

Life is all about what we choose to

do.

Greg

dx AS at 53

" "

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08/01/2008 10:30 PM

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Re: A Woman

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