Dating, Attraction, Bad Boys

[Guest guest]

Matt and ,

I don't think all women want bad boys, and were I a

nice guy, I'd be pretty leery of a woman who chased

bad boys—she's not someone you want to deal with. One

of the things that attracted me to my AS husband is

that he is who he is. Personally, I think pretending

to be something you're not in order to get a date is

not the recipe for a long-lasting relationship. (We

could all use to refine and/or soften our

personalities somewhat, but that's honest

self-improvement, not a wholesale game of pretend.)

Do you have hobbies or interests you could get

involved in where you would be busy doing something

around women with similar interests? That might be an

easier way to get to know women than sitting down over

coffee and having to make conversation. Maybe join a

community theatre group (they need people to work

backstage, not just as actors) or take a cooking class

or something like that?

On a similar topic as Matt's menstrual cycle theory,

there was an article in Mental Floss Magazine (and a

similar article in Time) that addressed pheromones,

the sense of smell, and attraction. The snip (below)

in particular caught my attention, because it made me

wonder if the low sex drive of some AS folks might be

related to the wiring in the part of the brain that

processes emotions. There is no mention of autism in

the articles, but if arousal is caused by the scent of

pheromones crossing the emotional processing part of

brain, and that part of one's brain is differently

wired, would arousal still occur with the same

intensity?

From Mental Floss Magazine:

<http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/14306#more-14306>

<<They found that pheromones in sweat could make skin

temperatures and hormone levels fluctuate, indicating

arousal. And later, MRI studies showed that pheromone

concentrations as low as one-trillionth of a gram lit

up people’s brains like fireworks—especially the parts

responsible for sexual behavior and processing

emotions.<<

MCJ

--- Matt wrote:

> It depends on their time of the month, i heard this

> from dr.drew from love line, during their

> menstration cycle they want the bad boys and when

> they are off they need the nice guy. It is that

> happy medium between needing that perfect Arsehole

> and a nice guy. No nice guys dont finish last, just

> the shy ones. If you figure out how to be

> strong/confident and also emotionally open and

> romantic then you found the balance that is hard for

> us guys to be ok with and woman are dying for. Any

> girls on the list have thoughts why you perfer bad

> boys over nice guys? Below is reasons i have found

> why women perfer badboys.

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