Guest guest Posted June 11, 2008 Report Share Posted June 11, 2008 Maybe you are trying to hard to change? And resisting the bad emotions that comes from the " I should change " thoughts? The " I should be mindful " -thoughts?What if you just noticed, that you were " mindless " and that you didn't act the way you had planned - but also didn't give yourself a hard time about it, just accepted in and confirmed your values of acting the next time? I'm in the same boat as you a lot of times. And I'm on my way in the right direction. But I have noticed that kicking myself for not doing " the right thing in this and that situation " doesn't help at all. Instead, be happy that you noticed you were mindless! That's also becoming mindful. Each time that happens, you are working closer to your goal.Resisting / not accepting that you sometimes forget to become mindful, forget to accept and forget to act is the opposite of what ACT seems to be all about - Jeppe I don't know about you but I feel like I know what I should be doing yet still I am not doing it! I know I should try and be more mindful. It is very difficult for me to be mindful in certain social situations. I don't have any problem being mindful at home when I am by myself. It's almost as if I'm on autopilot when I'm out of my comfort zone. Being on autopilot is probably the exact opposite of being mindful. Sometimes it seems like these social scenarios repeat themselves over and over and I always seem to play the same part in all of them. I sometimes feel completely discouraged and powerless to change. > > Carol, I've been doing this too, finding all sorts of ways to avoid > what needs doing. Because, like you say, sometimes I'm not even > aware of avoiding something until after the fact, certainly > 'mindlessness' must be a big part of what's going on but I'm at a loss > how to live mindfully when there's so much to do on a daily basis. > > But then there's other times when I'm afraid of what needs doing and > these are not big jobs, just small things, like responding to emails, > making phone calls, paying bills and keeping track of > expenses,shopping, that sort of thing. I'm trying to face these fears > as they come up but finding it very difficult. > > Any suggestions would be appreciated. > > Thanks, > Christie > > > > > > > I don't know > > > > Does the tendency to avoid certain situations ever go away? Avoidance > > is so automatic for me in some situations that I usually don't even > > realize I've acted on my thoughts until the situation has passed. I've > > been leaning ACT for about the past year and have noticed many times > > and situations where the pull is too avoid. The problem is that I > > usually only seem to notice that I've avoided something after I've > > actually avoided it. > > I guess I'm feeling a little frustrated and wondering if my > > expectations are off? > > I'm just curious what other people have experienced in this area? > > Thanks, Carol > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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