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I am dealing with something now that is causing acute distress. I have been seeing a man for about three months. I knew he was not a potential partner (from what he said to me), so I found myself struggling with my strong feelings for him that came up. He is truly an attractive, wonderful man and much younger then his 64 years. He now thinks of me as one of his best friends.

I knew he was looking for a potential spouse (he has never been married). I recently earned that he has found someone via the internet in whom he is very interested, and they have travelled the 200 miles to see each other several times since I've known him. This coming Saturday, he told me he is taking her to a peace dance, which he took me to last month -- and I assumed I would go with him again this month. When he told me that, my chest and stomach tightened and I became phsycially ill. My heart was pounding out of my chest. Feelings of betrayal and rejection and not being good enough are running non-stop through my mind, even though I intellectually recognize that my feelings are not the truth about me.

I have been acknowledging my stressful thoughts and feelings and then just letting them go. Then they pop up again immediately.

Now I am trying to decide if I want to go to this dance alone and see HER, which could be upsetting to me. A part of me says "face your fears" but another part says "don't put yourself in a hurtful situation." I am brave enough to go and just flow with whatever happens, but I must say it terrifies me.

What to do?Thanks,

Helena

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