Wow! values versus goals!

[Guest guest]

I'd like to thank everyone who's answered in one go as these were

exactly the sort of thoughtful answers I was hoping for.

Maybe some of what I write will be of interest to others just becasue

I am so new to this and especially to the language being used. The

unfortunate point is that I could write several 1000 word answers in

reply already!

I thought I'd better introduce myself. I have had moderate to severe

OCD for the last 11 years (looking back its origins obviously were in

childhood) and similarly with depression.

I'm also a linguist so am particularly interested in the language

perspective of ACT and also in the exact meanings or should I say

inexact meanings of words, as I believe we all use words somewhat

differently, maybe have our own personal definitions and maybe many

of us don't ever get to the point of considering exactly what we mean

by a word or what effect language has on our life.

The flip side of this of course is that my OCD centres on honesty and

communication and, in one word for me, FRAUD!

It strikes me though that much of what has been written in these

answers describes ACT more as a philosophy for life than a treatment

for a disorder. I live in the UK and in this world of NHS target-

related medicine, finite goals are a prerequisite!

However, when I set my goals two years ago on starting CBT I think I

was actually very aware of values in setting them. But I needed to

have some clear goals to deal with how OCD was working against my

living according to my values! I was already very aware of how my

thinking and feelings were involved in moving me further away from

my " goals " including being a friend and good mother even though my

children are grown up. So maybe I was not interpreting the word goal

in its strict sense in the first place! I think values are always

present in my mind. In fact they were what my OCD focussed on!

If you have been unable to talk (and I actually mean suffering from

mutism at times) and stammering and ticcing and avoiding people

because you think you will let them down (and why would you care if

you didn'ty value them?) obviously a first goal has to be to contact

people you are avoiding or even just walk down the street without

fear that they may ask you how you are and you might lie!

My long term goal was to get a degree in psychology and I am now on

the point of starting that, have a pile of very scary books in front

of me now but I am reminding myself that I am doing this knowing that

it won't be the end of the world or mean I am a total fraud <G> if I

find it too hard and give up. I will then just find some other way of

pursuing my values. So I don't see a goal necessarily as an end point

but as a decision along the way that can play some part or other in

my life.

I can't see a philosophy being prescribed on the NHS so I wonder if

ACT will ever become a treatment offered here! However, having said

that my therapist does know about ACT and has commended me for

reading books on mindfulness.

I imagine that there are two groups of people who get therapy in the

UK on the NHS and they will be those suffering from a disorder (after

a long wait!) as well as possibly those who have committed some sort

of crime. The latter I imagine may be getting therapy with a view to

changing their values.

Having suggested a distinction here between therapy for a disorder

and philosophy for a happier life, I would add that one of my goals

is to make what I have learnt in CBT a way of life when the therapy

ends in a few weeks' time! It won't end when I've reached the goals

I've set as I know I will always be susceptible to OCD and depression.

Best,

Louise