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Janet

In defense of your cardiologist, he/she really doesn't want to mislead

you I'm sure. I really cornered my daughter's cardiologist and just

about shook the answers out of him, and yet these answers couldn't

have been further from the truth. The fact is, each child responds

differently to their circumstances.

I don't know what you're child's heart problems are, but often

families who are told that their child's heart valve replacement will

hold for 7 years, but then in a year it starts to leak and needs

replaced already and the parents are upset. VSDs and ASDs that are

expected to close on their own don't, or vice versa.

Originally we were told that my daughter would need a series of open

heart surgeries during her first few years with subsequent surgeries

when the timing was right. We were told that these would be

scheduled, etc. etc. Yet each of my daughter's 2 open hearts were

emergency surgeries done under extremely difficult circumstances.

Than when we had the cath to determine how many more surgeries she

would have, we were told her pulmonary arteries did not respond

according to their hopes and plans, no more surgeries. In other

words, she is inoperable, they are not capable of repairing her heart.

So you see, if you pin them down for an answer, you'll only be

preparing yourself for circumstances that really may never

materialize. You just need to learn to take each day as it comes and

not look to the future so much. I know you're probably trying this

and it's easier said than done, but you just have to make peace with

the fact that the docs really just don't know what's in store for our

children. In fact, no docs at birth were able to anticipate my

daughter's needing a hernia repair, appendectomy, 4 eye

muscle surgeries, etc. And it's actually easier not knowing and

worrying about them in advance anyway.

Jeanne mom to Caitlyn age 3 1/2yrs cHaRgEr

>One thing that really bugs me is that our cardiologist doesn't give

>me a straight answer when I ask about future surgeries, etc. for

>. I realize that he doesn't have a crystal ball and that he is

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