nada denial (wasRe: bad childhood, good life)

[Guest guest]

Trish,

The funniest thing is that the all bad child is still a product of

the bp's raising. I mean to say, if your nada thinks your brother is

all bad, then what does that say about the way she raised him? Kind

of like when someone goes to work and what they produce sucks. Whose

fault is that? Whose accountable? Never a nada- always someone else's

fault. Children just kind of fall out of the sky, right?

Yeah, right. I've two of my own now and one thing I know is that

people are most assuredly conditionable- including myself and I'm

rather glad I am as my dh didn't put up w/my crap and I changed quite

a bit to be more accountable. My nada could go through the same thing

you and I went through w/our dhs and still be the victim- never grow

or change or held accountable- just find new ways to maneveur out of

that particular fox hole.

K

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > > > You can never please a borderline.

> > > > > > Your existence is Not Good Enough.

> > > > > > Because it doesn't make them happy...

> > > > > > After listening to Yeti's drivel for so many years I

started

> > > to

> > > > > > believe it. If I dared question it I'd be attacked.

The

> > > > legacy

> > > > > > of Not Good Enough parenting is pretty shattering isn't

it?

> > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > > > You are right on the money with " can never please " .

Isn't it

> > > odd

> > > > > > that it takes us so long to realize that nada will NEVER

be

> > > > > > interested in pleasing us? I have listened for years to

> > nada

> > > > make

> > > > > > negative, vile, destroying comments. All with the intent

and

> > > > evil

> > > > > > purpose of destroying my basic good self that the good

Lord

> > > > intended

> > > > > > for me to be.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I am currently reading Dr. Schlessinger's book, Bad

> > > > Childhood,

> > > > > > Good Life. I am not a big fan of Dr. ; a few years

ago

> > I

> > > > tried

> > > > > > to listen to her program and could only listen for 5

minutes

> > > > before

> > > > > > I had to change the channel. However, I am receiving

> > > validation

> > > > > > from what Dr. is writing in this book.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > 1) never be good enough

> > > > > > 2) mother won't change

> > > > > > 3) that KO risks her own future and those around her

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Dr. discusses the present of evil. The presence

of

> > > evil

> > > > is

> > > > > > not something I welcome. My nada does enjoy being evil

and

> > > > saying

> > > > > > cruel things to me and to other people. (there was a

time

> > > when I

> > > > > > thought I was the only target of her wrath, it was

somewhat

> > of

> > > a

> > > > > > relief to know she was an asshole to others

also ......LOL)

> > > She

> > > > > > gets on a high, a power trip; you can see it in her

> > expression

> > > > and

> > > > > > in her voice. There is a lot of pride, a major boost to

her

> > > ego

> > > > as

> > > > > > she verbalizes evil. I remember the shock of recognition

as

> > I

> > > > > > watched and listened to nada during one of her verbal

> > > rants. I

> > > > do

> > > > > > not want to witness, do not want to participate by my

silence

> > > > when I

> > > > > > am with her. I want a better life for myself and the

dear

> > > loved

> > > > > > ones I am building a life for and with. I want to make

> > > positive

> > > > > > choices. Take care, mg

> > > > > >

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

>