Please help, in need of help

August 15, 2012

Hey everyone,

I am so new to this and I am so overwhelmed. I found out my daughter has autism

today. My son was diagnosed on June 20th and I feel just helpless. My son went

to the public school preschool for special education when he was 3 and they had

given him a label of MR-NC. At the time he did not have a diagnosis of autism

but I suspected. We had him go for a year and then we pulled him out and did

some private stuff at home. Well, when he was diagnosed I contacted the school

district and I hadn't heard back from them so when I went to the local

elementary school and the vice principal who was very nice told me that he

agreed they need to find out what was going on so he told me if I didn't hear

back by Friday to let him know and he would find out. He told me he wasn't sure

if my son would go to that school because they had other schools in the district

that handled autism more but he would find out for me. So I got a call from the

special education director today who basically told me to enroll him at the

public school I had gone to. I asked her about his diagnosis and she told me

they would take that into consideration. Well, this leaves me with a lot of

questions like who is his teacher? Will he be mainstreamed with an aide? What

are his goals? Are they going off his old IEP from when he was 3? He was

nonverbal then and he can talk now so how can that IEP be valid? I literally

have no idea what he is doing and I don't want to just find out the first day.

My daughter will go to the preschool and she hasn't even had an evaluation yet.

On top of the school thing I feel like our family is under tremendous stress. I

don't even want to get out of bed in the morning. Our house is so chaotic

because I have no idea how to handle these two. There is constant screaming,

fighting, door opening and shutting, temper tantrums, destruction going on. I

get one mess cleaned up and they have another one going. Not just little messes

but pour hand soap on the carpet messes. My other kids never did these things

and learned fast with consequences but I have no idea how to discipline them.

I'm trying to be consistent with time outs but my son gets mad and hits and

bites himself and screams. Is there anyone who helps with this kind of stuff?

I feel so alone and frankly I think I am starting to hit depression. I'm not

myself lately. My husband tries to be helpful and take the strain off of me but

he travels a lot with his job and he has to work. I'm just tired and have no

clue as to what I am doing.

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