Re: Inquiry: He shouldn’t be such a clever shit

[Guest guest]

Wow... that's beneficial. Thank you!

And you know what? You're a clever (and brave) shit for sending that to

and posting it on the group!

> Hi all,

>

> This thought came up yesterday while reading a posting from

> - I worked it through for myself, then asked if it was OK to

> share and he said yes.

>

> To be clear, it's not really about him at all, it's what I was

> projecting onto him. Inquiring really shifted where I was in that

> moment :-)

>

> Any comments or feedback appreciated - also, if you have any inquiries

> about me, more than happy to have them shared on here - I'd also be

> happy to publish them on my blog as a 'guest' entry.

>

> With love and thanks,

>

> Jon

>

> --------------------------------

>

> Inquiry: He shouldn't be such a clever shit

>

> Is that true?

> Yes :-)

>

> Can I absolutely know that this is true?

> Can I absolutely know that I would be happier if I got what I want?

> No

>

> How do I react when I believe this thought?

> I read the comments he adds and there's a tense feeling inside – it's

> like `does he have to dissect everything?!' – and at the same time I

> feel jealous – it's what I often hold back on doing, for fear of

> being

> disliked.

>

> I'm completely in his business when I believe this thought.

>

> Does this thought bring peace or stress into your life?

> Stress :-)

>

> Can I think of a single stress-free reason to keep this thought?

> No, not a single one.

>

> Can I think of a reason to drop this thought?

> Yes, J'm able to appreciate just how much he brings to the group.

>

> Who would I be without this thought?

> Really happy again – excited, energized, enthusiastic.

>

> Really able to appreciate the accuracy and razor-sharp insight that he

> has – he picks up stuff that I don't even see.

>

> Really able to appreciate how much of himself he brings to the group,

> without looking for approval or `softening' his words to avoid

> conflict (which is something I do).

>

> Turnarounds:

>

> He should be such a clever shit

> Yes, this is truer – he is – and I mean this in a really positive

> way

> – I'm really getting what has been said previously about him – he's

> really good.

>

> It's better for me that he is, because he helps me to shatter any

> illusions that I have about how `good' I am at this stuff – brings me

> back to earth.

>

> I shouldn't be such a clever shit

> Yes, I can see this – definitely when I'm dictating what he should

> and

> shouldn't do, as well as when I offer insights and play with beliefs

> without regard for how the people that are disclosing them are feeling.

> I can see a few situations in the last day or so where I've done the

> `clever shit' thing.

>

> I should be such a clever shit

> I can find other ways in which this is true – sometimes I hold back

> on

> what I can see for fear of offending or hurting people.

>

>