Warmup

[Guest guest]

Thanks to all for the warm welcome!

I've found myself holding off on an initial post because I feel like

it needs to be perfect - like I need to choose just the right topic to

work on, or like it needs to sound wise, or that I need to come across

well.

So, maybe that itself is a good topic to start on. As I untangle my

thoughts, I'll write them down . . .

- My first post needs to be perfect.

- I need people in this forum to respond well to me.

- If my first few posts are good enough, I'll be " accepted " in the

group. If they're not, I won't be.

- There's a lot at stake because the people here might have things in

common with me [e.g., finding insight in some the same books] and thus

there's potential for me to connect with and receive validation from

them. I'd better not blow it. (Unstated assumptions: People who have

enough in common with me to connect with me at a deep level are few

and far between. [scarcity thinking])

So, obviously there's a lot of image management going on in my head.

Instead of using actual problems from my life as jumping-off points,

the self-consciousness of trying to join into the group has sort of

reared as a " meta " problem, turning a happy thing (finding this group)

into a stressful thing (trying not to blow it).

I'm not sure which of these thoughts is the " best " one to start doing

the work on - they're just sort of a cluster of related thoughts, and

I'm sure some are more at the root than others. Any advice on where

to start?

Jeff