Re: The People We Meet

[Guest guest]

Bharat Sir

 

I found your article very tastefully written & crisp. The language is simple &

easy to understand even for a great Hinglish pundit like me! The article is a

purists view of assesing a person. To my mind, one only makes acquaintainces

after a certain age & time. These are people who can be useful to one's life &

are probably honest to one in this while. Let us all think carefully how many

real friends have we made in the last 10 years. I am sure the number is far &

few. The changing times has made it even tougher to rely on any person to be

called as friend in a short period & is a tough ask i believe. I think the real

friends are all made in one's childhood or college days & those associations are

very honest & without expectations from one another....lets see how many agree

with me!

 

Rakesh

My Best Regds

 

Rakesh Khera

Sr Consultant

Dept Of Urology,Robotics & Renal transplant

Medanta Medicity

Gurgaon

Cell- 9810549377

Subject: The People We Meet

To: " mgims " <mgims >

Date: Sunday, July 8, 2012, 4:10 PM

 

 I need not explain why I have written this piece. I would like to have your

comments on its quality. Please pay attention to language (Is it easy to

understand?), coherence (Do the thoughts flow out smoothly and are they linked

properly?) and logic (Have different points been explained adequately and

convincingly? ).

                                                     

       The People We Meet

We meet a number of

persons routinely for various reasons and in different circumstances. A few of

them become our friends. Others are just social acquaintances. Then there are

those who spend a lot of time with us at the workplace. Everyone has different

opinions and feelings about the people in their contact. In some way or the

other, we tend to assess anybody we meet. This judgment decides how close the

other person would be. It also helps us know how much we value that person and

how enjoyable a relationship with him would be. We carry out this social

appraisal all the time. It happens automatically and subconsciously.   

 

We can apply some

deliberate methods to evaluate a person. First, it should be clear as to what

needs to be checked. One would naturally like to know as much as possible about

others. Sometimes a complete assessment is imperative in formal settings. For a

simple assessment, one needs to know personal, social and functional attributes

of the person. An idea about that person’s intelligence, communication skills

and interests will complete the picture.

 

Knowing a person

completely is an elaborate process because of the complex structure of every

personality. Therefore, only a few easily observable and understandable

attributes should be the focus. These qualities are also important because they

are reflective of our basic personality and denote our real worth as a person.

Our

personality is the basis for the people to like us and establish a bond. The

important personal qualities are as follows:

1.    Honesty   It represents righteousness. Honesty gives solidity

to our personality. An honest person will be seen as credible and reliable.

2.    Confidence     A

person’s confidence reflects his self-esteem. Confidence enables a man to

handle all situations easily and effectively.

3.    Rationality    It

is easy to understand and accept a person with rational thinking. Rationality

has a tremendous effect on the functional life because it is equated with

reasoning,

problem solving and decision-making.

4.    Consideration    A

considerate person has due concern for others. He respects their views and

makes concessions for their feelings. He has patience for people with a

different and, sometimes, difficult nature, He has more tolerance and

acceptance for their shortcomings.  This

quality is essential for a true and long-lasting friendship.

5.    Modesty    Modesty is a sign of greatness. A         modest

person will never be overbearing

with others. He has the ability to see his abilities and achievements in

perspective.

6.    Warmth    It

is a special quality: easily felt, but difficult to describe. We immediately

know when we meet a person with an open mind and a warm heart. One feels

comfortable and good in the company of a warm person.

 

“Man is a social

animal†is an age-old cliché. However, this aphorism and its meaning will be

pertinent eternally. Everybody has a status and role in the society. However, at

the basic level, we are interested in a person’s behavior in the common social

settings. In such circumstances, we are judged by the degree of our social

refinement and adaptability. Our sociability is the factor that makes others

pleased with us.

 

Everyone spends a large

part of his life as a functional entity. We have to undertake some work either

for a living or, in a few cases, driven by a personal or public cause. The

output of our work and its quality defines our functional capacity. In our

work, it is important to have compatibility with others. This enables us to

integrate our ideas and initiatives with those of people working with a similar

purpose. Others also assess us with regard to the positive (and the negative)

influence

that we have on them. Authority is an integral part of our functional life. Our

response to superiors in the hierarchy shows our firmness (not to be confused

with rigidity) in our principles and the flexibility (not to be confused with

submissiveness) in our approach. Since power is an important test of a

person’s

beliefs and values, people always watch us to know how we use the authority

vested

in our position. We demonstrate our maturity and justness through our

authority. People constantly evaluate and appreciate our functional

accomplishments. 

 

We feel real

enjoyment in certain relationships. Going beyond enjoyment, some experiences

lead to enrichment. It is a privilege to be with an intelligent person. Common

interests give depth to our relationships. Even a person with a sharp intellect

and varied interests should be able to communicate his thoughts coherently and

precisely to engage others meaningfully. People who can match your

intelligence, share your interests and comfort you with their conversations

have a special place in your life.

 

There is a considerable

overlap between the different aspects of our character. We do not always deal

with others in totality. There are situations when we interact with people in a

restricted manner. Notwithstanding the nature and the strength of our

relationship with a person, we still assess him against our own and the general

standards. The real assessment demands that the assessor himself should have a

stable and positive personality without any gross aberrations. We must judge

ourselves before we decide to judge others.

Bharat

[Guest guest]

Bharat,

Please pay attention to language (Is it easy to understand?) YES

, coherence (Do the thoughts flow out smoothly and are they linked

properly?) YES

and logic (Have different points been explained adequately and

convincingly? ). YES

Coming to the people we meet.

Over the last many years 99% of the people I met have been my patients. And

I didn't ever need to judge them on any socio-economic

guidelines because the intention was never to form friendship. However a

different kind of relationship developed as we all term it the patient -

doctor relationship. Some considered me close and I was invited to

birthdays, anniversaries, weddings and even trayodashi sanskars. Therefore

on happy and sad occasions. But that I wouldn't term friendship.

Talking about friendship - 99% of the friends that I have (my " good

friends " ) are either those whom I know since school, or those who lived in

my neighborhood (they have now moved away and I'm still in touch and still

consider them good friends), or my batchmates from college, colleagues with

whom I have worked under the same roof. They are my good friends. But the

last category are friends because we share a common profession, interest,

schedule, etc.

If you note from the above, judgmental attitude may work at

a subconscious level - but that's about all.

Ravin '82

[Guest guest]

Dear Bharat,

I have gone trough your writings and(sorry to say), I feel that you have

deviated from your original line of thought as you have progressed in your

writings.

Are you trying to analyze as to what constitutes a real friendship vis-a-vis a

mere casual acquaintence?

Or, are you trying to analyze as to how does a true friend come to our life and

how does that person stay there and for how long ?

Or, do you want to know the qualities that fit into a befitting " true " friend

????

We all are aware that we make a select group of friends as we go along in life.

They are there to stay as a permanent phenomenon..whether we like it or not.

That special relationship can not be replicated ever.

However, we should not belittle the importance of our acquaintences. They

constitute our daily lifestyle and are the basis of what we do and respond on a

day-2-day basis. They can-not be wished away and they are the ones who shape our

understanding and our everyday behavioural patterns. If we are in a pensive mood

at the end of the day or we loose our sleep in the night , it is because of

these people and not because of people whom we have known all our life, are

comfortable with, but, still manage to meet them probably once a year.. Food for

thought ......

Sunil Takiar(76)

________________________________

To: mgims <mgims >

Sent: Sunday, 8 July 2012 4:10 PM

Subject: The People We Meet

 

 I need not explain why I have written this piece. I would like to have your

comments on its quality. Please pay attention to language (Is it easy to

understand?), coherence (Do the thoughts flow out smoothly and are they linked

properly?) and logic (Have different points been explained adequately and

convincingly? ).

                                                     

       The People We Meet

We meet a number of

persons routinely for various reasons and in different circumstances. A few of

them become our friends. Others are just social acquaintances. Then there are

those who spend a lot of time with us at the workplace. Everyone has different

opinions and feelings about the people in their contact. In some way or the

other, we tend to assess anybody we meet. This judgment decides how close the

other person would be. It also helps us know how much we value that person and

how enjoyable a relationship with him would be. We carry out this social

appraisal all the time. It happens automatically and subconsciously.   

 

We can apply some

deliberate methods to evaluate a person. First, it should be clear as to what

needs to be checked. One would naturally like to know as much as possible about

others. Sometimes a complete assessment is imperative in formal settings. For a

simple assessment, one needs to know personal, social and functional attributes

of the person. An idea about that person’s intelligence, communication skills

and interests will complete the picture.

 

Knowing a person

completely is an elaborate process because of the complex structure of every

personality. Therefore, only a few easily observable and understandable

attributes should be the focus. These qualities are also important because they

are reflective of our basic personality and denote our real worth as a person.

Our

personality is the basis for the people to like us and establish a bond. The

important personal qualities are as follows:

1.    Honesty   It represents righteousness. Honesty gives solidity

to our personality. An honest person will be seen as credible and reliable.

2.    Confidence     A

person’s confidence reflects his self-esteem. Confidence enables a man to

handle all situations easily and effectively.

3.    Rationality    It

is easy to understand and accept a person with rational thinking. Rationality

has a tremendous effect on the functional life because it is equated with

reasoning,

problem solving and decision-making.

4.    Consideration    A

considerate person has due concern for others. He respects their views and

makes concessions for their feelings. He has patience for people with a

different and, sometimes, difficult nature, He has more tolerance and

acceptance for their shortcomings.  This

quality is essential for a true and long-lasting friendship.

5.    Modesty    Modesty is a sign of greatness. A         modest

person will never be overbearing

with others. He has the ability to see his abilities and achievements in

perspective.

6.    Warmth    It

is a special quality: easily felt, but difficult to describe. We immediately

know when we meet a person with an open mind and a warm heart. One feels

comfortable and good in the company of a warm person.

 

“Man is a social

animal†is an age-old cliché. However, this aphorism and its meaning will be

pertinent eternally. Everybody has a status and role in the society. However, at

the basic level, we are interested in a person’s behavior in the common social

settings. In such circumstances, we are judged by the degree of our social

refinement and adaptability. Our sociability is the factor that makes others

pleased with us.

 

Everyone spends a large

part of his life as a functional entity. We have to undertake some work either

for a living or, in a few cases, driven by a personal or public cause. The

output of our work and its quality defines our functional capacity. In our

work, it is important to have compatibility with others. This enables us to

integrate our ideas and initiatives with those of people working with a similar

purpose. Others also assess us with regard to the positive (and the negative)

influence

that we have on them. Authority is an integral part of our functional life. Our

response to superiors in the hierarchy shows our firmness (not to be confused

with rigidity) in our principles and the flexibility (not to be confused with

submissiveness) in our approach. Since power is an important test of a

person’s

beliefs and values, people always watch us to know how we use the authority

vested

in our position. We demonstrate our maturity and justness through our

authority. People constantly evaluate and appreciate our functional

accomplishments. 

 

We feel real

enjoyment in certain relationships. Going beyond enjoyment, some experiences

lead to enrichment. It is a privilege to be with an intelligent person. Common

interests give depth to our relationships. Even a person with a sharp intellect

and varied interests should be able to communicate his thoughts coherently and

precisely to engage others meaningfully. People who can match your

intelligence, share your interests and comfort you with their conversations

have a special place in your life.

 

There is a considerable

overlap between the different aspects of our character. We do not always deal

with others in totality. There are situations when we interact with people in a

restricted manner. Notwithstanding the nature and the strength of our

relationship with a person, we still assess him against our own and the general

standards. The real assessment demands that the assessor himself should have a

stable and positive personality without any gross aberrations. We must judge

ourselves before we decide to judge others.

Bharat

[Guest guest]

I was very specific when I asked for your comments. It was strictly about the

three questions at the beginning. There was no intention to talk about

friendship. In fact, there is no mention of friendship in the article. Also,

there is no attempt to categorise people as good or bad (they are what they are

and they will be what they will be).

I was simply interested in knowing your opinion about the technical quality of

the write-up. However, whatever else anybody has to say is welcome. I am sure it

would be interesting.

Bharat 

________________________________

To: " mgims " <mgims >

Sent: Monday, 9 July 2012 12:00 AM

Subject: Re: The People We Meet

 

Dear Bharat,

I have gone trough your writings and(sorry to say), I feel that you have

deviated from your original line of thought as you have progressed in your

writings.

Are you trying to analyze as to what constitutes a real friendship vis-a-vis a

mere casual acquaintence?

Or, are you trying to analyze as to how does a true friend come to our life and

how does that person stay there and for how long ?

Or, do you want to know the qualities that fit into a befitting " true " friend

????

We all are aware that we make a select group of friends as we go along in life.

They are there to stay as a permanent phenomenon..whether we like it or not.

That special relationship can not be replicated ever.

However, we should not belittle the importance of our acquaintences. They

constitute our daily lifestyle and are the basis of what we do and respond on a

day-2-day basis. They can-not be wished away and they are the ones who shape our

understanding and our everyday behavioural patterns. If we are in a pensive mood

at the end of the day or we loose our sleep in the night , it is because of

these people and not because of people whom we have known all our life, are

comfortable with, but, still manage to meet them probably once a year.. Food for

thought ......

Sunil Takiar(76)

________________________________

To: mgims <mgims >

Sent: Sunday, 8 July 2012 4:10 PM

Subject: The People We Meet

 

 I need not explain why I have written this piece. I would like to have your

comments on its quality. Please pay attention to language (Is it easy to

understand?), coherence (Do the thoughts flow out smoothly and are they linked

properly?) and logic (Have different points been explained adequately and

convincingly? ).

                                                     

       The People We Meet

We meet a number of

persons routinely for various reasons and in different circumstances. A few of

them become our friends. Others are just social acquaintances. Then there are

those who spend a lot of time with us at the workplace. Everyone has different

opinions and feelings about the people in their contact. In some way or the

other, we tend to assess anybody we meet. This judgment decides how close the

other person would be. It also helps us know how much we value that person and

how enjoyable a relationship with him would be. We carry out this social

appraisal all the time. It happens automatically and subconsciously.   

 

We can apply some

deliberate methods to evaluate a person. First, it should be clear as to what

needs to be checked. One would naturally like to know as much as possible about

others. Sometimes a complete assessment is imperative in formal settings. For a

simple assessment, one needs to know personal, social and functional attributes

of the person. An idea about that person’s intelligence, communication skills

and interests will complete the picture.

 

Knowing a person

completely is an elaborate process because of the complex structure of every

personality. Therefore, only a few easily observable and understandable

attributes should be the focus. These qualities are also important because they

are reflective of our basic personality and denote our real worth as a person.

Our

personality is the basis for the people to like us and establish a bond. The

important personal qualities are as follows:

1.    Honesty   It represents righteousness. Honesty gives solidity

to our personality. An honest person will be seen as credible and reliable.

2.    Confidence     A

person’s confidence reflects his self-esteem. Confidence enables a man to

handle all situations easily and effectively.

3.    Rationality    It

is easy to understand and accept a person with rational thinking. Rationality

has a tremendous effect on the functional life because it is equated with

reasoning,

problem solving and decision-making.

4.    Consideration    A

considerate person has due concern for others. He respects their views and

makes concessions for their feelings. He has patience for people with a

different and, sometimes, difficult nature, He has more tolerance and

acceptance for their shortcomings.  This

quality is essential for a true and long-lasting friendship.

5.    Modesty    Modesty is a sign of greatness. A         modest

person will never be overbearing

with others. He has the ability to see his abilities and achievements in

perspective.

6.    Warmth    It

is a special quality: easily felt, but difficult to describe. We immediately

know when we meet a person with an open mind and a warm heart. One feels

comfortable and good in the company of a warm person.

 

“Man is a social

animal†is an age-old cliché. However, this aphorism and its meaning will be

pertinent eternally. Everybody has a status and role in the society. However, at

the basic level, we are interested in a person’s behavior in the common social

settings. In such circumstances, we are judged by the degree of our social

refinement and adaptability. Our sociability is the factor that makes others

pleased with us.

 

Everyone spends a large

part of his life as a functional entity. We have to undertake some work either

for a living or, in a few cases, driven by a personal or public cause. The

output of our work and its quality defines our functional capacity. In our

work, it is important to have compatibility with others. This enables us to

integrate our ideas and initiatives with those of people working with a similar

purpose. Others also assess us with regard to the positive (and the negative)

influence

that we have on them. Authority is an integral part of our functional life. Our

response to superiors in the hierarchy shows our firmness (not to be confused

with rigidity) in our principles and the flexibility (not to be confused with

submissiveness) in our approach. Since power is an important test of a

person’s

beliefs and values, people always watch us to know how we use the authority

vested

in our position. We demonstrate our maturity and justness through our

authority. People constantly evaluate and appreciate our functional

accomplishments. 

 

We feel real

enjoyment in certain relationships. Going beyond enjoyment, some experiences

lead to enrichment. It is a privilege to be with an intelligent person. Common

interests give depth to our relationships. Even a person with a sharp intellect

and varied interests should be able to communicate his thoughts coherently and

precisely to engage others meaningfully. People who can match your

intelligence, share your interests and comfort you with their conversations

have a special place in your life.

 

There is a considerable

overlap between the different aspects of our character. We do not always deal

with others in totality. There are situations when we interact with people in a

restricted manner. Notwithstanding the nature and the strength of our

relationship with a person, we still assess him against our own and the general

standards. The real assessment demands that the assessor himself should have a

stable and positive personality without any gross aberrations. We must judge

ourselves before we decide to judge others.

Bharat

[Guest guest]

Dear Bharat,

Wonderful,is the word which comes after reading your article.Even I had same

thoughts about the people , but you could very nicely put it into clear words

and precise manner. Keep it up ,all of us are witnessing the birth of a great

literary talent !

V.K.Gupta 76

________________________________

To: mgims <mgims >

Sent: Sunday, 8 July 2012 4:10 PM

Subject: The People We Meet

 

 I need not explain why I have written this piece. I would like to have your

comments on its quality. Please pay attention to language (Is it easy to

understand?), coherence (Do the thoughts flow out smoothly and are they linked

properly?) and logic (Have different points been explained adequately and

convincingly? ).

                                                     

       The People We Meet

We meet a number of

persons routinely for various reasons and in different circumstances. A few of

them become our friends. Others are just social acquaintances. Then there are

those who spend a lot of time with us at the workplace. Everyone has different

opinions and feelings about the people in their contact. In some way or the

other, we tend to assess anybody we meet. This judgment decides how close the

other person would be. It also helps us know how much we value that person and

how enjoyable a relationship with him would be. We carry out this social

appraisal all the time. It happens automatically and subconsciously.   

 

We can apply some

deliberate methods to evaluate a person. First, it should be clear as to what

needs to be checked. One would naturally like to know as much as possible about

others. Sometimes a complete assessment is imperative in formal settings. For a

simple assessment, one needs to know personal, social and functional attributes

of the person. An idea about that person’s intelligence, communication skills

and interests will complete the picture.

 

Knowing a person

completely is an elaborate process because of the complex structure of every

personality. Therefore, only a few easily observable and understandable

attributes should be the focus. These qualities are also important because they

are reflective of our basic personality and denote our real worth as a person.

Our

personality is the basis for the people to like us and establish a bond. The

important personal qualities are as follows:

1.    Honesty   It represents righteousness. Honesty gives solidity

to our personality. An honest person will be seen as credible and reliable.

2.    Confidence     A

person’s confidence reflects his self-esteem. Confidence enables a man to

handle all situations easily and effectively.

3.    Rationality    It

is easy to understand and accept a person with rational thinking. Rationality

has a tremendous effect on the functional life because it is equated with

reasoning,

problem solving and decision-making.

4.    Consideration    A

considerate person has due concern for others. He respects their views and

makes concessions for their feelings. He has patience for people with a

different and, sometimes, difficult nature, He has more tolerance and

acceptance for their shortcomings.  This

quality is essential for a true and long-lasting friendship.

5.    Modesty    Modesty is a sign of greatness. A         modest

person will never be overbearing

with others. He has the ability to see his abilities and achievements in

perspective.

6.    Warmth    It

is a special quality: easily felt, but difficult to describe. We immediately

know when we meet a person with an open mind and a warm heart. One feels

comfortable and good in the company of a warm person.

 

“Man is a social

animal†is an age-old cliché. However, this aphorism and its meaning will be

pertinent eternally. Everybody has a status and role in the society. However, at

the basic level, we are interested in a person’s behavior in the common social

settings. In such circumstances, we are judged by the degree of our social

refinement and adaptability. Our sociability is the factor that makes others

pleased with us.

 

Everyone spends a large

part of his life as a functional entity. We have to undertake some work either

for a living or, in a few cases, driven by a personal or public cause. The

output of our work and its quality defines our functional capacity. In our

work, it is important to have compatibility with others. This enables us to

integrate our ideas and initiatives with those of people working with a similar

purpose. Others also assess us with regard to the positive (and the negative)

influence

that we have on them. Authority is an integral part of our functional life. Our

response to superiors in the hierarchy shows our firmness (not to be confused

with rigidity) in our principles and the flexibility (not to be confused with

submissiveness) in our approach. Since power is an important test of a

person’s

beliefs and values, people always watch us to know how we use the authority

vested

in our position. We demonstrate our maturity and justness through our

authority. People constantly evaluate and appreciate our functional

accomplishments. 

 

We feel real

enjoyment in certain relationships. Going beyond enjoyment, some experiences

lead to enrichment. It is a privilege to be with an intelligent person. Common

interests give depth to our relationships. Even a person with a sharp intellect

and varied interests should be able to communicate his thoughts coherently and

precisely to engage others meaningfully. People who can match your

intelligence, share your interests and comfort you with their conversations

have a special place in your life.

 

There is a considerable

overlap between the different aspects of our character. We do not always deal

with others in totality. There are situations when we interact with people in a

restricted manner. Notwithstanding the nature and the strength of our

relationship with a person, we still assess him against our own and the general

standards. The real assessment demands that the assessor himself should have a

stable and positive personality without any gross aberrations. We must judge

ourselves before we decide to judge others.

Bharat

[Guest guest]

Hi Bharat ! Friendship just happens when u like/vibe with some one ! Its not

something deliberate post analysis or planned !! Few people get close to u

easily and few don't despite efforts !Friends may not have all the great

qualities u expect but u like them as they anyway !! Bye friend ! Vinchy

Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

The People We Meet

 

 I need not explain why I have written this piece. I would like to have your

comments on its quality. Please pay attention to language (Is it easy to

understand?), coherence (Do the thoughts flow out smoothly and are they linked

properly?) and logic (Have different points been explained adequately and

convincingly? ).

                                                     

       The People We Meet

We meet a number of

persons routinely for various reasons and in different circumstances. A few of

them become our friends. Others are just social acquaintances. Then there are

those who spend a lot of time with us at the workplace. Everyone has different

opinions and feelings about the people in their contact. In some way or the

other, we tend to assess anybody we meet. This judgment decides how close the

other person would be. It also helps us know how much we value that person and

how enjoyable a relationship with him would be. We carry out this social

appraisal all the time. It happens automatically and subconsciously.   

 

We can apply some

deliberate methods to evaluate a person. First, it should be clear as to what

needs to be checked. One would naturally like to know as much as possible about

others. Sometimes a complete assessment is imperative in formal settings. For a

simple assessment, one needs to know personal, social and functional attributes

of the person. An idea about that person’s intelligence, communication skills

and interests will complete the picture.

 

Knowing a person

completely is an elaborate process because of the complex structure of every

personality. Therefore, only a few easily observable and understandable

attributes should be the focus. These qualities are also important because they

are reflective of our basic personality and denote our real worth as a person.

Our

personality is the basis for the people to like us and establish a bond. The

important personal qualities are as follows:

1.    Honesty   It represents righteousness. Honesty gives solidity

to our personality. An honest person will be seen as credible and reliable.

2.    Confidence     A

person’s confidence reflects his self-esteem. Confidence enables a man to

handle all situations easily and effectively.

3.    Rationality    It

is easy to understand and accept a person with rational thinking. Rationality

has a tremendous effect on the functional life because it is equated with

reasoning,

problem solving and decision-making.

4.    Consideration    A

considerate person has due concern for others. He respects their views and

makes concessions for their feelings. He has patience for people with a

different and, sometimes, difficult nature, He has more tolerance and

acceptance for their shortcomings.  This

quality is essential for a true and long-lasting friendship.

5.    Modesty    Modesty is a sign of greatness. A         modest

person will never be overbearing

with others. He has the ability to see his abilities and achievements in

perspective.

6.    Warmth    It

is a special quality: easily felt, but difficult to describe. We immediately

know when we meet a person with an open mind and a warm heart. One feels

comfortable and good in the company of a warm person.

 

“Man is a social

animal†is an age-old cliché. However, this aphorism and its meaning will be

pertinent eternally. Everybody has a status and role in the society. However, at

the basic level, we are interested in a person’s behavior in the common social

settings. In such circumstances, we are judged by the degree of our social

refinement and adaptability. Our sociability is the factor that makes others

pleased with us.

 

Everyone spends a large

part of his life as a functional entity. We have to undertake some work either

for a living or, in a few cases, driven by a personal or public cause. The

output of our work and its quality defines our functional capacity. In our

work, it is important to have compatibility with others. This enables us to

integrate our ideas and initiatives with those of people working with a similar

purpose. Others also assess us with regard to the positive (and the negative)

influence

that we have on them. Authority is an integral part of our functional life. Our

response to superiors in the hierarchy shows our firmness (not to be confused

with rigidity) in our principles and the flexibility (not to be confused with

submissiveness) in our approach. Since power is an important test of a

person’s

beliefs and values, people always watch us to know how we use the authority

vested

in our position. We demonstrate our maturity and justness through our

authority. People constantly evaluate and appreciate our functional

accomplishments. 

 

We feel real

enjoyment in certain relationships. Going beyond enjoyment, some experiences

lead to enrichment. It is a privilege to be with an intelligent person. Common

interests give depth to our relationships. Even a person with a sharp intellect

and varied interests should be able to communicate his thoughts coherently and

precisely to engage others meaningfully. People who can match your

intelligence, share your interests and comfort you with their conversations

have a special place in your life.

 

There is a considerable

overlap between the different aspects of our character. We do not always deal

with others in totality. There are situations when we interact with people in a

restricted manner. Notwithstanding the nature and the strength of our

relationship with a person, we still assess him against our own and the general

standards. The real assessment demands that the assessor himself should have a

stable and positive personality without any gross aberrations. We must judge

ourselves before we decide to judge others.

Bharat